December, 2016
December 3rd, 2016, 2:24 p.m. - "Is this what you do when I'm not here – make really good points?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine – "Skyfire Cycle": I liked that Terry got a spotlight, but the plot itself was kind of dull, and the sub-plots weren't much better. I do wish we'd gotten to hear more of Holt's 40-minute rant, though. Rating: 3 pairs of socks
Teen Wolf – "Sundowning": I'm still so confused. Why do some people remember more than others? Are Melissa and Chris going to get to be in the main story? WHY IS CLAUDIA HERE? Rating: 3 pineal glands
Speechless – "R-A-Y-C-Ray-cation": The main point of the main plot seemed to encapsulate the show pretty well – how can J.J. become his own person if he still relies on others? I like the way this was portrayed this week. He's a nice guy who would make a great boyfriend, but he doesn't come into the relationship by himself. Rating: 4 creepy clown dolls
Modern Family – "The Alliance": This was really clever. Who knew Phil, Gloria, and Cam could outsmart the others? Rating: 4 trips to get "orange juice"
The Big Bang Theory – "The Property Division Collision": Speaking of clever, nice trick played by Sheldon. And it was great seeing Christopher Lloyd. He needs to do more stuff. Rating: 4 giant paintings of Penny and Amy that we haven't seen in years
Supernatural – "Rock Never Dies": I can't say I'm sorry to see Vince go. He just wasn't working for me. Is there any way we can bring back Mark Pellegrino? Rating: 3 leather jackets Dean can wear any time he wants, as far as I'm concerned
December 10th, 2016, 1:28 p.m. - "I think of the Heimlich as an act of love between two consenting adults, one of whom is choking"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine – "The Overmining": Lots of good stuff here, especially Ken Marino, and the Holt vs. Gina dynamic. And now we know exactly how far Gina's willing to go to get what she wants. Rating: 4 space heaters
Teen Wolf – "Relics": Okay, it's starting to come together a little. Is there a way they can get more hellhounds? Why is Jordan the only one? P.S. How long until Chris and Melissa hook up? Rating: 4 wallpaper tears
Speechless – "S-L-E-Sled Hockey": I liked all of the plots this week. Dylan is really becoming one of my favorite TV characters, with Kenneth very close behind. Rating: 4 knocked-out teeth
Supernatural – "Lotus": Talk about hitting close to home. Is 2016 going to end with, say, Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders going to jail? Rating: 3 burning Bibles
December 11th, 2016, 9:32 p.m. - If you'd told me 15 years ago that one day I'd enjoy reading about science, I would have stared at you, speechless
34. Grunt (Mary Roach)
Up next: Before the Fall (Noah Hawley)
December 17th, 2016, 2:07 p.m. - "We should toilet-paper their houses." "With rocks"
America's Next Top Model – "Business, Boss, Brand": Different but still familiar. I'm a little excited. My early favorites are Giah and Coryanne. Rating: 4 times I said "you met her five hours ago" to Starr's histrionics
Brooklyn Nine-Nine – "Captain Latvia": This was an awesome display of Joe Lo Truglio's talents. I enjoyed the drunk caroler, too. Rating: 4 fake calls about bombs
Teen Wolf – "Radio Silence": I propose a spin-off where it's just Peter Hale reluctantly helping people every week. You know people would watch it. Rating: 4 key rings
Speechless – "C-H-O-Choir": Someone yelling, "Stick to singing, J.J.!" at the end of the episode was possibly the high point of this entire TV season. Rating: 4 missing vans
Modern Family – "Snow Ball": Pretty unmemorable. I think the Manny/Luke dynamic has been played out. Let's do something different. Rating: 3 confiscated drinks
The Big Bang Theory – "The Birthday Synchronicity": Aw, Halley is a good name. I just wish we'd gotten to see Bernadette after the birth, to show that she's really happy, since she wasn't as into having a baby as Howard was. Rating: 4 Wizarding World costumes
December 22nd, 2016, 6:36 p.m. - The message of this book is, no joke, men ruin everything
35. Before the Fall (Noah Hawley)
Up next: Evicted (Matthew Desmond)
December 24th, 2016, 11:22 a.m. - Stacey McKenzie, come back any time
America's Next Top Model – "Lights, Camera, Catwalk": I know I put Coryanne on my list of early favorites last week, but I'm not that imrpessed with her anymore. I actually think she should have gone home instead of Justine, who should have gotten a second chance. And now I think the twins are forces to be reckoned with. Rating: 4 voguers who didn't actually contribute anything
December 28th, 2016, 7:51 p.m. - Welcome to America. It sucks. (Also, year-end book roundup)
36. Evicted (Matthew Desmond)
Up next: The Regional Office is Under Attack! (Manuel Gonzales)
And now, the year-end book roundup, with everything I read and learned in 2016:
1. In the world of used books, those in excellent condition are called "very fine as new." (Finders Keepers, Stephen King) – New Hampshire, Massachusetts
The best: Shrill, Big Little Lies, You Will Know Me, Commonwealth
The worst: The Nix
Book that Entertainment Weekly named one of the ten best that I disagreed with the most: The Nix
Favorite characters: Pete Saubers (Finders Keepers), Madeline Mackenzie (Big Little Lies)
Least favorite characters: Bert Cousins (Commonwealth)
Book that most lived up to its hype: You Will Know Me
Books that least lived up to their hype: The Nest, The Nix
Book I was looking forward to that didn't disappoint: Grunt
Books I was looking forward to that did disappoint: City of the Lost, The Fireman
Books I'm most looking forward to in 2017: Meg Gardiner's UNSUB, John Darnielle's Universal Harvester
December 29th, 2016, 9:16 p.m. - Oh, stuff it, Marissa
America's Next Top Model – "Make Your Mark": Everyone needs to CALM DOWN. Especially people named Marissa and Tash. P.S. Is Coryanne's hair a joke? Like, they gave her that hairstyle as a test, and she reacted well, so her reward is to get it changed? Please. Rating: 4 non-apologies – I didn't hear the words "I'm sorry," Marissa
The next time someone asks me who I'd want to eat with if given the choice of anyone, living or dead, I might answer Mary Roach. I would learn SO MUCH and have fun doing it.
There's a lot of good stuff here, but I'm not sure how I feel about the ending. I guess I was looking for more. I do like how Hawley writes dialogue, though. It's very realistic. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, since he writes for TV.
This book is so frustrating. Why aren't there more policies in place to protect people without money? Why do people feel it's okay to profit from exploiting vulnerable people? Why do I feel like this isn't going to get better anytime soon? Wait, I know the answer to that one.
2. If employees at your local big box store are acting weird, they might be in a cult. (You Too Can Have a Body Like Mine, Alexandra Kleeman) – U.S.
3. You can race barges. (The Crooked House, Christobel Kent) – U.K.
4. The prosecution's portion of the O.J. Simpson trial alone equaled 34,500 pages of transcripts. (The Run of His Life: The People v. O.J. Simpson, Jeffrey Toobin) – California
5. Bones can be used to determine where a person has lived. (Black-Eyed Susans, Julia Heaberlin) – Texas
6. In Japanese, dead spirits that haunt the living until wrongs have been righted are called yurei. (The Boy Who Drew Monsters, Keith Donohue) – Maine
7. You can make a thermometer out of a jar, a straw, Play-Doh, and rubbing alcohol. (The Passenger, Lisa Lutz) – U.S.
8. Austria doesn't have a navy. (Memory Man, David Baldacci) – U.S.
9. Nanny cams can be hacked. (Fool Me Once, Harlan Coben) – New Jersey, New York, Pennsylvania, Connecticut
10. Sudden, strong labor (as in having a baby) is called precipitate labor. (The Nest, Cynthia D'Aprix Sweeney) – New York, somewhere in the Caribbean
11. People who aren't Chechen don't want to be mistaken for Chechens. (Relief Map, Rosalie Knecht) – Pennsylvania, California
12. What's worse than getting raped in Montana? Trying to take the rapist to court. (Missoula, Jon Krakauer) – Montana
13. It's easier to recognize someone you've never met if you see moving footage of that person, rather than just a photo. (Version Control, Dexter Palmer) – New Jersey, D.C., New York
14. Germany, the Netherlands, and Belgium could all fit in the Yukon. (City of the Lost, Kelley Armstrong) – Canada
15. Our brains produce oxytocin when we receive praise or acceptance from a group of people. (The Fireman, Joe Hill) – New Hampshire, Maine
16. The Hindu god Ganesh is believed to remove obstacles and ease journeys. (American Gods, Neil Gaiman) – U.S., Iceland
17. Noe Valley isn't really a valley. (All the Birds in the Sky, Charlie Jane Anders) – Massachusetts, Connecticut, California, Colorado
18. The guys in the band Spoon don't have a great sense of humor. (Shrill, Lindy West) – Washington, California
19. Australia's school year starts in January. (Big Little Lies, Liane Moriarty) – Australia, Canada
20. I'm not saying I ever want to, but I could probably skin a squirrel now if I had to. (The Last One, Alexandra Oliva) – U.S.
21. During the Cold War, Some people built their own hot-air balloon and used it to fly over the Berlin Wall. (The Husband's Secret, Liane Moriarty) – Australia
22. When giving first aid, remember DRS ABCD: danger, response, send for help, airway, breathing, CPR, defibrillator. (Truly Madly Guilty, Liane Moriarty) – Australia
23. There's a giant fountain in Houston called the Waterwall. (Good as Gone, Amy Gentry) – Texas, Washington, Oregon, California
24. The world's tallest statue is China's Spring Temple Buddha. (Harmony, Carolyn Parkhurst) – New Hampshire, D.C.
25. Scarlet fever is gross. (You Will Know Me, Megan Abbott) – U.S.
26. The Norwegian word "gift" means both "married" and "poison." (The Nix, Nathan Hill) – U.S., Iraq, Norway
27. There are mines called Claymores, but there are also swords with the same name. (A Dirty Job, Christopher Moore) – California, Arizona
28. People pay a lot of money for Swiss walking sticks. (Commonwealth, Ann Patchett) – U.S., Switzerland
29. "Black-ops reputation management" is a thing. (So You've Been Publicly Shamed, Jon Ronson) – U.K., U.S., Morocco
30. I learned some British slang, in case I ever need to use that. (The Wicked Girls, Alex Marwood) – U.K.
31. Clapham Junction is the busiest tube station in the U.K. (The Killer Next Door, Alex Marwood) – U.K.
32. There's quicksand in the U.K. (The Darkest Secret, Alex Marwood) – U.K.
33. In Greek, the prefix "a" means "without." (Inherit the Bones, Emily Littlejohn) – Colorado
34. Julia Child worked on an OSS project that aimed to develop shark repellent. (Grunt, Mary Roach) – U.S., Djibouti
35. Airlines decorate apartments in different cities the same to help their employees deal with jetlag. (Before the Fall, Noah Hawley) – U.S., U.K.
36. It's illegal to refuse to rent a home to a family just because they have children. (Evicted, Matthew Desmond) – Wisconsin