January, 2014
January 4th, 2014, 12:43 p.m. - Insert Bernadette's fake laugh here
Top Chef - "Mississippi Mud Bugs": Noooo, not Carrie! And definitely not before Carlos and Nicholas! Now we have to put up with the Bickerson Twins for at least another week. Boooooo! Rating: 4 unclean knives
The Big Bang Theory - "The Hesitation Ramification": The show doesn't get serious that often, so it was nice to see Sheldon showing some compassion. I'm guessing Penny and Leonard will work things out, though, since it would be awkward for them to break up again. As awkward as Raj and Stuart trying to have a conversation. Rating: 3 people who didn't have their parts cut
January 5th, 2014, 10:51 p.m. - Playing origami with time
1. A Tale for the Time Being (Ruth Ozeki)
Up next: The Thieves of Manhattan (Adam Langer)
January 11th, 2014, 4:04 p.m. - "It seems like a dangerous precedent to let him think he can be right"
Modern Family - "And One to Grow On": There was a lot going on here, but it ended up coming together well. I really wish they would get away from the plots where Jay and Gloria try to meddle in Manny's life. Every time they do, it goes badly; whenever they don't, things turn out fine for him. Why haven't they learned anything? Rating: 4 coat pockets
Psych - "Lock, Stock, Some Smoking Barrels and Burton Guster's Goblet of Fire": I didn't enjoy the previous Depereaux episodes, but this one was great. Cary Elwes did both the helpless-leader-with-dumb-minions and criminal-mastermind characters well. I also liked the inconclusive ending. Sometimes it's nice when things aren't wrapped up all pretty. Rating: 4 wands
Top Chef - "Oui Si a Challenge": I actually have no problem with Nicholas not resigning. Yes, he should have been eliminated (if he hadn't been protected); yes, resigning might have led the judges to skip eliminating anyone this week; yes, he looks like a jerk for letting Stephanie get cut instead. But they're close to the end now, and if he was guaranteed a spot in the next round, he had every right to hold on to it. Plus, if there's anything we've learned from reality shows, it should be that you never give up protection. Rating: 4 pieces of chocolate chicken (ew)
The Big Bang Theory - "The Occupation Recalibration": I feel like we're recycling plots here. But I enjoyed Amy with Raj and Howard, and Bernadette with Stuart. Rating: 3 ruined comic books
January 14th, 2014, 10:08 p.m. - Put on your franzens (eh, ick)
2. The Thieves of Manhattan (Adam Langer)
Up next: The Girl Factory (Karen Dietrich)
January 19th, 2014, 1:12 p.m. - "There's a good chance that one of you might die today. Probably you"
How I Met Your Mother - "Slapsgiving 3: Slappointment in Slapmarra": Apparently I was the only person who liked this episode (minus the casual racism, of course). But I think so many people are done with this show that they'll hate anything. Rating: 4 lessons in accuracy that don't actually teach anything
Modern Family - "Under Pressure": Almost everything was good here, even though it was a little strange for the show to go somewhere serious. I will never be unhappy to see Jane Krakowski. I also enjoyed Jay reverting to childhood. Rating: 4 Styrofoam peanuts
Psych - "S.E.I.Z.E. the Day": I got bored in the middle. But yay for a Lassie episode, and yay for Trout, who I seriously love. Rating: 3 Chewbaccaccinos
Top Chef - "Po' Boy Smackdown": Freaking A, how is Nicholas still here? Even he thinks he should be gone! Rating: 3 uncomfortable critiques from Roy Choi
January 21st, 2014, 5:03 p.m. - Going nowhere, not getting there all that fast
3. The Girl Factory (Karen Dietrich)
Up next: Son of a Gun (Justin St. Germain)
January 25th, 2014, 2:07 p.m. - "That was the best mickey I've ever been slipped. I gotta find that guy and thank him"
How I Met Your Mother - "Unpause": Yay, we're doing stuff! We're moving plots along! Things are happening! Can we get Barney drunk again? Rating: 4 embarrassing stuffed animals
Modern Family - "Three Dinners": Cam and Mitchell's plot was so perfect for them. Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Eric Stonestreet do their best work in those sorts of situations. And I loved Haley showing that she has it together more than people think she does. Rating: 4 blog posts
Psych - "Remake AKA Cloudy...With a Chance of Improvement": This episode had me so confused. Confused and entertained. I don't get what the point was, but I liked it anyway. Rating: 4 green suits
Top Chef - "Leaving New Orleans": Yay, no more Carlos and Nicholas complaining about each other! Unless Carlos comes back, of course. And if he doesn't, Louis will definitely have earned his place, because MAN, did he kill Last Chance Kitchen. Rating: 4 biscuits Nina forgot (but it didn't matter – yay, Nina!)
January 26th, 2014, 1:02 p.m. - Sad and haunting
4. Son of a Gun (Justin St. Germain)
Up next: Doctor Sleep (Stephen King)
Good luck living up to these standards, every other book I read this year.
The first two sections were entertaining, even though not much happened in them. Then I got to the third section and couldn't read it fast enough. If you can get through parts 1 and 2, you'll be rewarded. Just suspend your disbelief.
I like Dietrich's writing, but I didn't like this book. It needed a ton of editing. It feels like it's stream-of-consciousness writing, but it's choppier than that. And really, nothing happens. There's a story here, but it doesn't emerge enough.
12 years after his mother was murdered by her abusive fifth husband, St. Germain set out to find out why she would get to a place where she could be murdered by an abusive fifth husband. I like St. Germain's writing style, and the way he handles such an emotional subject. He was clearly affected very deeply by what happened, and it still weighs on him.