January, 2018



January 6th, 2018, 2:01 p.m. - "Oh, I don't answer questions that prove someone else's point"

The X-Files – "My Struggle III": I'm clinging to the probability that CSM is lying about being William's father, but if he's not, Chris Carter can bite me. Rating: 3 unnecessarily long car sequences

Speechless – "N-E-NEW Y-YEAR'S E-EVE": Drunk Jimmy is spectacular. The most spectacular. The spectacularest. Rating: 4 bananas

Modern Family – "He Said, She Shed": How many problems on this show could be solved by people just talking to each other and being honest? [Insert gif of West Collins saying, "So many."] Rating: 3 fake letters

The Good Place – "Leap to Faith": Aw, I wanted to see more of Mindy. I assume the next time we see her, she'll be coked out of her mind. Rating: 4 bands that make Janet act drunk (Drunk Janet is also spectacular)


January 10th, 2018, 10:37 p.m. - Who run the world? Girls

1. The Power (Naomi Alderman)
So if women developed a physical advantage over men and rose to power around the world, they would do the same things to men that men currently do to women?

Really?

Up next: Away With Words (Joe Berkowitz)


January 13th, 2018, 2:13 p.m. - "The real Bad Place was the friends we made along the way"

Ghosted – "Snatcher": I'm still not completely sold on this show, but I keep watching because I at least get a few laughs out of it every week. This episode was kind of slow, though. And the B-plot was total filler. Rating: 3 abandoned cabins

America's Next Top Model – "The Boss Is Back": If I had to place a bet on the winner right now, my money would be on Rio. Mark my words. Rating: 4 times I rolled my eyes at Liberty's name

The X-Files – "This": I loved this episode. So many fun moments and quotable lines. The bar is high for the rest of the season, guys. Don't blow it. Rating: 5 muffins

Speechless – "THE H-U-S-HUSTLE": The kids' plot was eh, but the stuff at the fundraiser was fun. John Ross Bowie remains a virtually undiscovered gem. Rating: 3 pairs of platform shoes

Modern Family – "Dear Beloved Family": Joe having an existential crisis and then passing it on to his friends was awesome. Rating: 4 massages from Fred Savage

The Good Place – "Best Self": This felt like a placeholder episode. Not bad, just...not great. Rating: 3 hot-air balloons


January 19th, 2018, 8:31 p.m. - Dad jokes... So many dad jokes...

2. Away with Words (Joe Berkowitz)
This was a fun read, but by the end, I was like, "Okay, enough already."

Up next: Playing Dead (Elizabeth Greenwood)


January 20th, 2018, 1:24 p.m. - "I'm so relieved! I don't have to kill your mother!"

America's Next Top Model – "Beauty Is Los Angeles": Rio didn't do anything this week, but she's still my pick to win. I think Khrystyana might be in the finals with her. Also, I wish I could remember anyone else's name. Rating: 3 skateboarders

The X-Files – "Plus One": I thought this episode was going to be more fun than it was. But hey, I'm not complaining about the sex! Rating: 3 hangman games

Speechless – "D-I-DIMEO A-C-ACADEMY": A good, solid episode. I wish more people watched this show. I enjoy it so much. Rating: 4 rented cars

Modern Family – "In Your Head": How dare they underuse Cheyenne Jackson! It's an outrage! Nice use of Mira Sorvino, though. Rating: 4 jars of caviar

Supernatural – "Wayward Sisters": If the spinoff gets picked up, I'll absolutely watch it. They've lined up an excellent group of characters. I love that they ended this episode with a cliffhanger, to make people want to watch the spinoff and find out what happens next. Rating: 4 lizards that taste like lizard

The Good Place – "Rhonda, Diana, Jake, and Trent": Honestly, right now I'm mostly interested in finding out who the ultimate judge is. I can't wait. Rating: 4 thumbs-down pins


January 27th, 2018, 2:05 p.m. - How to fake your death (or not)

3. Playing Dead (Elizabeth Greenwood)
I was actually a little disappointed about how short this was. I really liked Greenwood's writing and would love to read something else by her.

Up next: Exit West (Mohsin Hamid)


January 28th, 2018, 3:16 p.m. - "Guys, if this turns out to be killer cats, I'm going to be very disappointed"

America's Next Top Model – "Beauty Is a Trademark": The makeover episode almost isn't worth it if no one has a total breakdown. This one was weak. Rating: 3 times I wanted to go back in time and punch Ashley's father for calling her dumb as a child

The X-Files – "The Lost Art of Forehead Sweat": At one point, I was laughing so loudly that I had to cover my mouth so my neighbors wouldn't wonder what was going on. Brian Huskey is excellent in everything he does, and he was perfectly cast here. I'm not familiar with the actor who played Dr. They, but he was also terrific. Rating: 5 gelatin molds made in impressions of Bigfoot's foot

Supernatural – "Breakdown": This is the most I've ever liked Donna. She's usually the comic relief, but I enjoyed seeing her more serious this time. This episode made me look forward to the spin-off even more. Rating: 4 auctioned body parts

The Good Place – "The Burrito": I adore Maya Rudolph, and her work in this episode was perfect. More Jen, please! (We do not have a boring name!) Rating: 4 bottles of envy sauce


January 31st, 2018, 6:05 p.m. - "We are all migrants through time"

4. Exit West (Mohsin Hamid)
No wonder this was on so many Best of 2017 lists. The story is enchanting. The run-on sentences made my anxiety flare up, but I loved them anyway.

Up next: Bonfire (Krysten Ritter)



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