March, 2006



March 1st, 2006, 6:34 p.m. - "Put on Some Pants, It's Time to Dance!"

Aaaand they're off!


March 4th, 2006, 11:38 p.m. - You're a Democrat. We get it

4. The Partly Cloudy Patriot (Sarah Vowell)
I really wanted to like this book. I really wanted to like Sarah Vowell in general. I tried Assassination Vacation because I thought it would cute and quirky, but I could barely make it through the first chapter. I moved on to The Partly Cloudy Patriot instead because it covered more topics than just the sites of presidential assassinations. I liked this one at first, but then it just got old. I think Vowell wanted to expose some of the quirks of America, but she wound up not really exposing anything. There wasn't really anything new there. And she spent every other page talking about her political believes, like, yeah, I don't like Bush either, but I shut up about it every once in a while. But she tried, so there's that. And she's freaking friends with Buffy's Doug Petrie, so I have to respect that.

Up next: My Fundamentalist Education (Christine Rosen)


March 6th, 2006, 6:13 p.m. - Double your Apprentice articles...

...double your...something.

Apprentice Corner Office and Mailroom Assignments

"Seduced by Brainpower"


March 7th, 2006, 8:33 p.m. - Time for a career change!

You know what would be the coolest job? Backup singer on American Idol. You get to sing a bunch of new songs on TV every week (actually, three times a week) and you're never in danger of being voted out. So how do I go about getting this job, hmmmm?


March 10th, 2006, 12:04 a.m. - It's so weird writing something new

Apprentice Corner Office and Mailroom Assignments


March 14th, 2006, 1:56 p.m. - Something old, something new

"Trumptastic" - thought this was up already. Oops! Also, somehow the title disappeared. Oh, well.

"Shark Bait" - I Ivanka'd The Apprentice for Betsy last night. Also, the title reminds me of Finding Nemo, which makes me laugh.


March 15th, 2006, 8:52 a.m. - See, it's a double entendre...

"Valley of the Dolls"

Isaac Hayes is a Scientologist? Who knew?

Anne Proulx? Shut up. Just because you're all progressive or whatever because you wrote a story about gay cowboys doesn't give you an excuse to insult other movies. You're bitter. Get therapy. Actually, everyone who didn't like Crash? Shut up. Get over it. It happened. Deal. Stop talking about it.


March 16th, 2006, 5:39 p.m. - Early this week!

Apprentice Corner Office and Mailroom Assignments


March 20th, 2006, 2:08 p.m. - Shut up, Andrea

"Teed Off" - also, I'm never doing three Apprentice articles in one week again


March 22rd, 2006, 8:50 a.m. - Gnomes again?

"Gnome-Man's Land"

6:17 p.m.

5. My Fundamentalist Education (Christine Rosen)
Rosen is a great storyteller. Basically the book is just a bunch of stories, but she pieces them together nicely and makes you wonder what the end result will be. The book is her memoir of attending a fundamentalist elementary school and mostly believing things that she was taught even if she didn't completely understand them. Having been raised in the church, I related to her a lot. There are a lot of things we teach children and expect them to understand that they just can't grasp at a young age. And how many times do we basically tell kids, "Believe this or you'll go to Hell"? It's a little scary. I'd like to read more about the rest of Rosen's life, as she left the school after eighth grade and she and her sisters are no longer fundamentalists. I'd like to follow her through high school and college and see how her earlier experiences colored the later ones.

Up next: This Day (edited by Joni B. Cole and others)


March 23rd, 2006, 10:37 p.m. - Boo!

Apprentice corner office and mailroom assignments


March 26th, 2006, 4:28 p.m. - Gimme more! Gimme more!

6. This Day (edited by Joni B. Cole and others)
This should tell you something about my feelings on this book: I finished it yesterday, and today I went out and bought the sequel. I loved it. My only complaint is that it was too short. I wish they'd included more about some of the women who weren't featured much. The book is a compilation of diary entries from hundreds of women around the country (and some in other parts of the world). They're all fairly normal women (with a couple of celebrities in there) and it's really interesting to read about a regular day in their lives. Some of them are really great writers, even though they have no experience. I can't wait for the second one.

Up next: This Day in the Life (edited by Joni B. Cole and others)


March 27th, 2006, 2:05 p.m. - It should've been Andrea

"The Melancholy Woes of Brent Michael Buckman"


March 29th, 2006, 7:59 p.m. - Miscellaneous thoughts

"I Don't Know, I'm Just a Girl!" - seriously, shut up, Michelle

A got a Christmas gift today. It was a tree ornament. If you're going to give me a Christmas gift three months after the holiday, at least make it something I can use in the next nine months.

I was fast-forwarding through commercials today and realized that they were showing an Alias commercial because I caught a glimpse of Scary Teeth-Pulling Asian Guy. I think that proves how much of a fan I am.

Apparently my talkative, pregnant sister-in-law joked to her friends that she's going to have a silent birth. Their response was, "Have you ever had a silent moment?"


March 31st, 2006, 12:03 a.m. - All aboard the anti-Andrea train!

Apprentice corner office/mailroom assignments



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