October, 2014
October 4th, 2014, 4:43 p.m. - What a weird book
31. The Bone Clocks (David Mitchell)
Up next: Hand to Mouth (Linda Tirado)
October 5th, 2014, 3:22 p.m. - Cyrus, what are you doing?? Cyrus, staaaaahp!
The Big Bang Theory – "The First Pitch Insufficiency": Eh. Mostly predictable stuff. I don't care about Leonard and Penny's relationship as much as the show wants me to. Rating: 3 relationship quizzes
Survivor – "Method to This Madness": Also predictable. The only purpose John Rocker serves right now is giving me someone I want to punch in the face more than Jeff Probst (which, admittedly, is pretty impressive). Rating: 3 sexist remarks
Modern Family – "Do Not Push": They better not be giving even a hint of an impression that Alex wants to go to Cal Tech because of a guy. In other, better news, Sarah Hyland was terrific this week. Rating: 3 big red buttons
Scandal – "The State of the Union": Nice try, Abby, but you just don't give a rallying speech like Olivia. One of you needs to go talk to Cyrus, though. He's in some troubleeeeeee... Rating: 3 corkscrews used as weapons
How to Get Away With Murder – "It's All Her Fault": Again with the predictability. Of course Wes was on the phone with Rebecca. Of course the daughter was this week's murderer (we all saw Legally Blonde). Of course Sam is shady. Let's pick things up a little here. Rating: 3 super-creepy expressions from Steven Weber
The Amazing Race – "When You Gotta Go, You Gotta Go": Every time someone complains about a task this season, I want Bethany to respond, "Okay, but did you do it one-handed?" Even if she doesn�t win, she'll inspire a ton of people. Rating: 4 pancakes
America's Next Top Model – "The Guy Who Wears Heels": I also want to punch Denzel in the face more than Probst this week, so there's that. I was so glad Will wore his heels to panel. He should wear them everywhere the rest of the season. Rating: 4 additional points Shei should have gotten for the acting challenge – she was robbed
October 11th, 2014, 12:29 p.m. - A mixed bag here
32. Hand to Mouth (Linda Tirado)
Up next: Bad Feminist (Roxane Gay)
October 12th, 2014, 1:12 p.m. - What did Misha Collins do to deserve such a boring plot?
Homeland – "The Drone Queen"/"Trylon and Perisphere": We're off to a great start. That bathtub scene was haunting, and should be the only thing Claire Danes needs to clinch another Emmy. I'm slightly disappointed that Corey Stoll was only in one episode, since I thought he was going to stick around for the season, but he's in everything else right now, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Rating: 4 ugly cakes
The Big Bang Theory – "The Hook-Up Reverberation": They should have stuck with the comic-book-store plot. The Penny/Emily stuff was lame. Rating: 3 hypothetical vans to pick up children
Supernatural – "Black": I spent the past six months bingeing on Supernatural, and now I'm a super-fan. And also a Dean girl.
But this episode...ugh. So boring. I didn't find anything interesting until the last scene. One of the best parts of the show is the guys' interaction, so if you have an episode where they barely interact, there's a huge piece missing. And I like the idea of Dean as a demon, but not much happened there. We need to know more about what Crowley's up to. We also need way less of Hannah. Like, none of Hannah. No Hannah at all. Poor Cas must be as bored as I was. Rating: 3 bad karaoke performances
Survivor – "Actions vs. Accusations": Thank you, smart Survivors, for getting rid of John Rocker. He was not entertaining TV. He was disturbing TV. And the "we need to keep him around because he'll be good in challenges" excuse doesn't fly when you've lost all but one challenge. Rating: 3 instances of trash-talk
Modern Family – "The Cold": Okay, show, stop giving Julie Bowen physical-comedy bits. You're better than that. Give us more of Haley and Andy; they're really interesting together. Rating: 4 world capitals
Scandal – "Inside the Bubble": Scott Foley, never leave us. You are so needed on this show. Same to you, Bellamy Young. Rating: 4 glasses of Scotch
How to Get Away With Murder – "Smile or Go to Jail": After last week's disappointing episode, I was pleased that the show got back to what I expected it to be. I like the idea of getting to know each character a little more every week. Next can they give Liza Weil more to do? Rating: 4 lost engagement rings
The Amazing Race – "Get Your Sheep Together": Stubborn animals are always comedy gold on this show. I could watch those sheep hop around all day. Rating: 5 uncooperative ponies
America's Next Top Model – "The Girl Who Says It's Over": I love Cory, but having him pose as a robot was such a waste of his skills. Still, can we swap Denzel out for him? Rating: 3 half-topless shots
October 18th, 2014, 12:48 p.m. - Another mixed bag here
33. Bad Feminist (Roxane Gay)
Up next: Broken Monsters (Lauren Beukes)
October 19th, 2014, 1:20 p.m. - Yay, Denzel's gone and Chantelle might come back!
Homeland – "Shalwar Kameez": Carrie, keep your hands to yourself! Or at least get on birth control! Saul, you need to be in charge again. Rating: 3 empty bottles in Quinn's apartment
The Big Bang Theory – "The Focus Attenuation": Drunk Bernadette is always funny. Drunk Amy = also funny. Studious Penny was a nice change, though. Rating: 3 countries shaped like body parts
Supernatural – "Reichenbach": Hannah's growing on me. If she smacks Metatron around a little more, I'll really like her. But Demon Dean was the best part of this episode, and I'm excited to see what else he has to offer. Rating: 4 times I rolled my eyes at Cole
Survivor – "We're a Hot Mess": Yay for good decisions! Yay for Drew going away! What else is there to say? Rating: 4 recovered pieces of flint
Modern Family – "Marco Polo": Jay and Gloria didn't let the Dunphys stay with them instead of a hotel? That whole plot shouldn't have happened. And why can't poor Manny catch a break with a girl? Girls have liked him in the past. He needs a slightly nerdy girl who writes poetry and likes to go to museums. Rating: 4 boxes of wine
Scandal – "The Bleep": Funny how they overhyped the ending of How to Get Away With Murder when Scandal had the better ending. This is a show that knows how to turn up the suspense. Poor Jake. Rating: 5 sex tapes starring the president's daughter
How to Get Away With Murder – "Let's Get to Snooping": A solid, though not great episode, with Elizabeth Perkins making up for a slightly predictable plot. (I knew Sara Paxton had to be involved because they wouldn't bring her in for just one scene.) If nothing else, this show is terrific at casting guest stars. Rating: 4 recorded phone calls
The Amazing Race – "Thinly Sliced Anchovies": I really like Kym and Alli, and I'm happy they did so well this week. I think they're dark horses. I also really like Maya and Amy, who have a great mix of nerdy and cool. They all seem to be having so much fun that it makes them fun to watch. Rating: 4 cakes
America's Next Top Model – "The Guy Who Wows Betsey Johnson": I'm so glad Shei is finally getting the recognition she deserves. She's another dark horse. I mean, clearly the winner is going to be Lenox or Will, but Shei's holding her own. Rating: 4 cartwheels Betsey Johnson can't do
October 25th, 2014, 1:26 p.m. - "Not since I fell off the roof while they were delivering our trampoline have things come together so perfectly"
Homeland – "Iron in the Fire": Carrie, I told you to KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF! Please use protection. Maggie isn't going to raise any more of your babies. Rating: 3 secretly alive terrorists
The Big Bang Theory – "The Expedition Approximation": Eh. Could have used more Amy. Rating: 3 Hannah Montana DVDs
Supernatural – "Soul Survivor": I wish we'd gotten more of Demon Dean's havoc, but I can't blame the writers for cutting it short. I really liked the cat-and-mouse game in the bunker; I'd been looking forward to it. Hannah's growing on me, and I feel bad for her – she got stabbed, Cas shut her down, and she had to sit in the car during all the fun stuff. Better luck in the future. Rating: 4 injections
Survivor – "Blood Is Blood": Hi, let's start voting strategically, shall we? Thanks. Rating: 3 sandbags
Modern Family – "Won't You Be Our Neighbor": I liked all three plots this week! That doesn't happen a lot. Tyne Daly, Steve Zahn, and Andrea Anders were all perfectly cast, and I hope to see them again in the future. Rating: 5 Sock 'n' Rolls
Scandal – "The Key": Mostly boring, except for the Jake stuff. I'd love to know how they're going to keep him alive. Rating: 3 poorly wrapped presents
How to Get Away With Murder – "We're Not Friends": Nothing happened. The plot didn't go anywhere. Everything that happened was predictable. Let's move things along, huh? Rating: 3 glimpses of wallpaper
The Amazing Race – "Morocc' and Roll": Who thought having only one arm would actually work to Bethany's advantage on a task? She and Adam are just so likable. Also likable: Kym and Alli. Dark horses, I'm telling you. Rating: 4 tea sets
America's Next Top Model – "The Girl With the Bloodcurdling Scream": Chantelle is back and Mirjana's gone! Is it my birthday? Rating: 4 condoms that were only flimsily connected to the photo shoot
5:54 p.m. - "The Banksy of serial killers"
34. Broken Monsters (Lauren Beukes)
Up next: Station Eleven (Emily St. John Mandel)
Great, except for the fifth section, which was so confusing and full of incomprehensible language that I just kept praying for it to end. Still more accessable than Cloud Atlas, though.
I liked the book, and I think it's an important read, but Tirado comes off almost as judgmental as the people she rails against. It's a 200-page rant. And yes, a lot of that rant needs to be said, but it made me feel bad for being middle-class. This would have worked better as a blog or a long article.
Gay makes a lot of good points, but, like Tirado, she does a lot of ranting. I'm kind of hesitant to say anything negative because I'm afraid she'll yell at me.
I was lukewarm on Beukes' The Shining Girls, but I thought Broken Monsters sounded interesting and wanted to give Beukes a second chance. As has happened in the past, that second chance was a good idea. Broken Monsters is creepy, well-paced, and perfect pre-Halloween reading.