September, 2004
September 3rd, 2004, 12:26 p.m. - You have too many thoughts
How did September get here so fast?
I'm still unemployed. I'm a bum. It's kind of fun, actually. Well, for me. Not so much for my parents.
The anti-frizz stuff I put in my hair smells like bug spray. Maybe bugs will be confused and stay away from me anyway.
I think I'm going to get season 3 of Alias on DVD. Despite the fact that everyone else hated it, I didn't think it was that horrible. And I need my Michael Vartan fix.
This is the most appropriate Buffy quote to apply to my life right now:
8:09 p.m. - Everything's a trade-off
My hair still smells like bug spray. But it's not as frizzy, so I guess the benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
10:51 p.m. - You get what you pay for. Which was nothing
I think my cat just ran into my bedroom door. Beppe's going to get a good laugh out of that.
September 10th, 2004, 1:19 a.m. - HEEEEEEEEELP!
Lycos Sidesearch is making me pull my hair out. I've downloaded numerous anti-virus, anti-spyware, and anti-adware programs. I've hit "sidesearch off" twenty times. I've uninstalled it from various places on my computer. But it keeps. Coming. Back. If anyone has any suggestions (other than the two I've already considered - defenestrating my computer or finding a Lycos employee who I can stab with a rusty knife), I'd appreciate it.
September 15th, 2004, 4:09 p.m. - Employment, here I come!
I mentioned two or three months ago that I applied for a job with the government. They said that they would get back to me within 45 days, and if I didn't hear anything within that time, I shouldn't expect to hear anything at all. The 45 days ended some time in August, so I gave up. Today, however, I received a letter inviting me to take an online test, the second step in the process. The test examines my English, computer, correspondence, math, and proofreading skills, as well as my attention to detail. I also have to take a typing test, but that shouldn't be any problem (I only have to type 40 WPM with a maximum of 5 errors, and I'm pretty sure I'm doing that right now). If I do well enough for their tastes, I get to go "attend a presentation" and then get an interview.
Oh, my gosh, this is ACTUALLY HAPPENING.
September 18th, 2004, 2:42 p.m. - I thought that once you graduated, the tests were supposed to END
I just did my tests; they went pretty well. I type 89 WPM! I don't know how many people I'm competing against, but I might have a pretty good chance of making it to the next round. I can only imagine the kinds of questions they would ask me in an interview.
September 21st, 2004, 3:48 p.m. - Ode to The Amazing Race's Phil, Chip, Kim, Brendan, Nicole, Linda, and Karen (oh, okay, to Colin and Christie, too)
7 Philiminations. "You outsmarted a cow!" An unused Yield. "I need a doctor-o!" Killer Fatigue. "I want to have kids!" Roadblocks and detours and pit stops, oh, my! "Charla, I'm gonna die!" Lying to ticket agents. "Booby Cooper." Taxi cab karma. "That was a pretty quick 11-hour flight." A Flying Fox. "I'm going to jail." An ostrich egg. "Do you speak Swahili?" A pound of caviar. "…Like a hamster in a wheel…." Goats, camels, donkeys, and the world's most famous ox. "I'll make it up to you, baby." Zorbs. "That's the bad one." Ugly American Syndrome. "Everyone else just walked across the shallow water there." The world's hottest host. "My ox is broken!"
Go Chip and Kim!
September 25th, 2004, 1:21 p.m. - Hmmm...
Is it true that lavender makes you sleepy? If not, the soap I'm using contains the world's greatest placebo.
September 29th, 2004, 3:36 p.m. - I'm totally going to pretend I'm a spy
I've found the coolest (kind of part-time, possibly temporary, totally random) job - mystery shopping. I'll get to go to stores, scope out customer service and other stuff, and report back. Plus, I'll get some free stuff, including meals. Now I need some walkie-talkies and code names so I can pretend I'm on top-secret missions. Because, deep down, I'm still 6 years old.
"Basically, I got as far as Oxnard and the engine fell out of my car, and that was literally. So, I ended up washing dishes at 'The Fabulous Ladies Night Club' for about a month and a half while I tried to pay for the repairs. No one really bothered me or even spoke to me until one night when one of the male strippers called in sick and no power on this earth will make me tell you the rest of that story. Suffice to say, I traded my car in for one that wasn't entirely made of rust, came trundling back home to the arms of my loving parents, where everything was exactly as it was except I sleep in the basement and I have to pay rent." - Xander, "The Freshman"