General Hospital blog - July, 2011

July 1st, 2011

Spinelli pulls a gun on Sonny, who finds him less than intimidating. Maxie begs for Sonny to leave Spinelli alone, which Sonny says he'll only do if he finds the missing $20 million. Spinelli sees the two of them together and has one of those stupid character-thinks-something's-going-on-when-the-situation-is-completely-innocent moments. Dante tracks down Lulu, who won't listen to his pleas not to work at the brothel. He then tries to buy a night with her. Maxie informs Jason that Sam wants to get married, even if she hasn't made any indications of feeling that way, so now Jason's brain is working overtime to try to decide if she's right. Elizabeth realizes she was to blame for Siobhan's health issues and worries that people won't believe it was an innocent mistake. (At least Lucky does.) Helena tells Lucky that Elizabeth's lying and Aiden is really Nikolas'. Patrick still hasn't made peace with the fact that he couldn't save Jake.

This is the first time anyone's suggested trying to figure out what's wrong with Spinelli? Everyone's just been sitting around going, "La la la, he sure is acting weird, la la la...." Nice.

I don't think Jason has ever talked that fast in his entire life.

Maybe there should be more of a difference between containers of medication than their colors? Just throwing that out there.

Who knew Helena hated Irish people? Also, I can't believe she didn't mention Jake even once.

July 2nd, 2011

Next week: Lawyers. Lots and lots of lawyers.

July 5th, 2011

Ethan and his new haircut catch Anthony threatening Kristina and warn him to stay away. Kristina's all "oh, my hero!" about it, which makes Ethan uncomfortable again about her feelings for him. He begs Michael to talk her down, but instead, Abby steps in and suggests that Ethan pretend to date someone else. She even offers herself as his fake girlfriend. Michael's skeptical about telling Kristina that Abby cheated on him with Ethan, but when Kristina arrives, Ethan immediately puts the plan in motion, telling Kristina that he and Abby know each other from Vaughn's. Spinelli tries to seduce Maxie again, telling her it's "every man for himself." Then he threatens Anthony, who says he's just looking for an excuse to kill Spinelli in self-defense. Lulu agrees to sleep with Dante, who gets her to agree to go home with him if she hasn't learned anything about Luke by the end of her shift. He thinks that if Luke sees her at the brothel, things will get worse. Lulu, however, understands her father better now that she's seen where he grew up. Javier gets a call from Luke and keeps it from Lulu, but Lupe tells her, making Lulu think that Luke might show up soon. Carly tries to get Michael to leave ELQ, but Michael wants to stick it out. She tells Edward there's no way he'll take Michael away from her, and he replies that he knows a number of family-court judges and could get Josslyn taken away from her. Carly goes to Sonny and Brenda to complain about Jax calling Michael and Morgan as witnesses, and Sonny firmly lets Brenda know that he's not supporting her in this fight. Steven blames himself for Elizabeth's misstep in surgery, telling Olivia he's going to offer to resign. Sonny tries to get Alexis to quit as Jax's lawyer.

This Ethan/Kristin/Michael/Abby thing? LOVE! Though it's a little strange that Ethan's more concerned about Kristina's infatuation with him than the fact that an insane mobster just threatened her.

Today's MOTE goes to Julie Marie Berman (I think she's gotten the majority of them) for the look on her face after Dante asked to see the rest of the brothel's selection of blondes.

Wow, Edward went from merely manipulating to truly menacing in five minutes. Bad move.

That one scene with Alexis and Sonny felt really tacked-on. Strange timing.

July 6th, 2011

Ethan and Abby's plan is working, but it's also ticking Kristina off and making her turn against Abby again. Ethan tells Johnny to call Anthony off, though for some reason Johnny doesn't let him know that he sees Anthony as a threat to Kristina. Johnny tells Anthony he can do whatever he wants as long as he doesn't hurt any women or children, though he doesn't seem to have a problem with Brenda being a target. Jax plans to use Shawn's dishonorable discharge against him in the custody case, yet another move Alexis tries but fails to talk him out of. He also organizes a visit from the mediator, Grace, so she'll see Carly at her worst. Elizabeth tells Siobhan about the surgery mishap, then gets slapped with a three-month suspension, plus six more months out of the OR. Steven is put on probation for his part in the incident. Siobhan is very opposed to the outcome and announces that she's suing Elizabeth for malpractice. Carly makes Jason promise never to let her get married again, which makes him think about the M word some more. Sam tells him that she's fine not getting married.

It "may" backfire, Michael? Whatever gave you that idea?

Um...someone needs to send Siobhan to a psychiatrist.

How is Elizabeth not worried about where her income will be coming from for the next three months?

Ew, Sam mentioned Courtney. Thanks a lot, McCall.

July 7th, 2011

Anthony and Johnny agree that they want to break Sonny down until they destroy him. Johnny is still against involving women and children, but Anthony isn't. He sends a shooter after Brenda and Alec (just as a warning), thinking Sonny won't retaliate because of the custody hearing. He's wrong, though Carly asks Jason to hold off on payback until the hearing. Sonny threatens Jax in front of the mediator, giving her a front-row seat to see the role of violence in Josslyn's life. Carly begs Alexis to stop representing Jax, and Alexis, already on the edge, gives in and tells Jax she can't help him take Carly's child away from her. Ethan tells Kristina 5,000 things she needs to hear (she's naïve, she's too young for him, her life is always in danger, he's ticked off Zacchara because of her), but she doesn't seem to listen to any of them. Jason thinks Sam's saying she's okay not being married because it's what he wants to hear. In reality, he wouldn't be opposed to putting a ring on it.

Yeah, Anthony, keep pretending this is all about Claudia. We totally believe you.

Brenda, instead of whining about the danger, DO SOMETHING. Like leave. Now. I'll help you pack!

A for effort, Ethan.

Jason, you've only had bad experiences with marriage because you were married to annoying people. Whatever, I don't get the big deal. He and Sam are practically married already.

July 8th, 2011

Brenda is forced to testify that Sonny's dangerous to children. Lucky learns that Siobhan's suing the hospital and tries to convince her that Elizabeth would never deliberately try to hurt her. Siobhan thinks Elizabeth's jealous enough to resort to murder, and that Lucky isn't objective enough to render an opinion. Steven tries to resign but is instead suspended indefinitely. Robin is named as his interim replacement, a move everyone likes except Patrick. Lucky tries to explain DNA to Cameron, who doesn't even bother to ask where babies come from.

If Carly puts Josslyn in danger by being associated with Sonny, then doesn't it stand to reason that Brenda does as well? So why does Jax think it's okay for Brenda to be around Josslyn? Also, would someone please bring up the fact that his brother's a terrorist?

Nice job, writers: I was just starting to like Siobhan, and now you've made her a jealous shrew.

Wasn't Monica the chief of staff for, like, five minutes after Alan died? They should have her take the job back.

Speaking of the Quartermaine, the resurgence continues: Robin Christopher is coming back next month. Can someone make her bring Alcazar with her?

July 9th, 2011

Next week: "Someone dies." I assume it's too late to put in a request?

July 11th, 2011

Brenda tells the judge about the previous day's shooting, not realizing that it was never reported to the police. When Sonny's called in to testify, the judge lays into him about violence and his children. Carly puts a stop to things before they can go too far, knowing the damage is already done anyway. She's also pretty sure Jax paid off Grace, since she knows more about the situation than she could through interviews and depositions. Sonny confirms that Jax paid Grace $300,000 and uses it to get her to do what he wants. Lucky convinces Siobhan to drop the malpractice suit, though she's worried that he'll go back to Elizabeth. This would make Elizabeth very happy, as she admits to Robin that she still loves Lucky. Lucky makes sure she knows that Aiden's paternity doesn't change what went wrong in their relationship before he was even conceived. Brenda tells Jax that she thinks Carly's unstable, but her own life is messed up because she grew up without her mother, so she doesn't want Josslyn to be cut off from Carly. Patrick thinks Robin will quickly grow sick of being the chief of staff.

Okay, Jax, even Brenda thinks you've taken things too far. It's time to chill.

I love how Brenda's surprised that no one called the police about the shooting. How long has she known Sonny?

Judge: "Have any of your children been shot?" Sonny, if I were writing for him: "Yes, but only one of them by me."

Suggestion: Carly and Sonny get back together, and Elizabeth hooks up with Shawn. Okay, so mostly I just want to see more of Shawn. But it could work, right?

July 12th, 2011

Maxie thinks that if Jason proposes to Sam, Spinelli will be so happy that Jackal PI will go away. Jason tries out the theory, but it backfires, as Jackal PI is sexist and doesn't want Sam to leave work to start a family. Jason urges Sam to open up to him, since she usually avoids what she really wants, thinking she'll lose it. Sam tells him she wants to spend the rest of her life with him, but that doesn't mean they need to get married. Jason says he needs more, but just as he's seemingly about to propose, Maxie interrupts to tell them that Spinelli somehow gets his gun back and is going after Anthony. Javier tries to get closer to Lulu, and is later protective when a john gets out of hand. Dante tackles the guy and kicks him out, earning himself a job as a bouncer at the brothel. Lulu tells Lupe she doesn't want him working there because he's distracting. Lupe spots Dante's badge and gets suspicious. Michael turns out to be a natural at business negotiation, helping Edward land a major deal. Asher warns that the company's in a "weird place" and one wrong move could topple it. Siobhan encourages Lucky to go to grief counseling, worried that he'll lash out again in a way that's worse than arson. Anthony wants to invest in ELQ, and apparently also has the hots for Tracy.

Gotta love the irony of Maxie pushing Jason to propose to Sam, then interrupting what was most likely going to be that proposal.

Also, Sam, if you don't want your relationship with Jason to end the way it did last time, you just have to not sleep with Ric. I think it'll be pretty easy. There's only one step: Don't sleep with Ric. Who's in California. And probably makes you physically ill.

Why is Dante wearing his badge anyway?

Be careful, Michael. The guy who killed your father was also named Asher.

I don't get why Lucky would find the idea of counseling so ridiculous. He goes to NA meetings, which are basically a form of group counseling. Also, when you're yelling at your wife for making a simple suggestion, you're not okay.

July 13th, 2011

Anthony gets Spinelli's gun, but Spinelli's too fearless/dumb to realize that Anthony actually plans to use it. Jason rescues him and tries to distract him with a stakeout at a bakery he claims the Trujillos might be using as a front. (It's not.) Lupe tells Lulu that Dante's a cop, then starts to go tell Javier. Lulu says she'll blackmail Dante and get him to leave instead. Meanwhile, Dante learns that Javier has a little drug side business going. Javier goes to see Lulu at her hotel and overhears her telling Dante that Lupe knows he's a cop. Asher's in bed with Zaccharas, having been hired to destabilize ELQ so Anthony can use it as a front. Michael's help with the big deal went against Anthony's plans, but he thinks Michael being at ELQ can work to his advantage. Monica goes to ELQ to see Michael and instead finds Tracy, who mentions that Michael is Monica's only living grandson. This leads to the revelation that Jake was Jason's son. Monica's upset that Jason didn't tell her, and more upset about a moment months ago when missed an opportunity to connect with Jake. Sam thinks she's talked Jason out of marriage, though she doesn't seem happy about it. Jason tells Maxie the opposite � he's going to propose. Tracy thinks Edward's crazy for hiring Michael and Abby, telling Michael that he needs to leave ELQ before a) he makes a company-destroying error or b) Edward becomes convinced that he'll stay on past the summer. Kristina's sure that there's nothing going on between Abby and Ethan.

You know what would be funny? If the bakery really is a front for the Trujillos.

Today's lesson: Use your inside voices, Dante and Lulu.

See? Never trust a guy named Asher. (Exception: A guy I actully know named Asher.)

I'm not sure what I'm happier about: Monica coming back, or the inevitability of a Monica/Jason scene.

July 14th, 2011

Sonny makes Grace drug Jax and pretend he attacked her. Carly goes to Alexis and begs for one last try at getting him to compromise. She asks what Alexis would do if Ric told her he would take Molly away unless she cut ties with Sonny and Sam. Alexis brings up the same hypothetical to Jax, who tells her he would absolutely make her choose. Molly overhears Alexis and Carly talking about Jax taking Josslyn and Morgan not having any idea. She tells him Jax is going to make sure he never sees his sister, then comes up with a plan that most likely involves kidnapping Josslyn. Javier kills Lupe, then waves a knife around when Lulu arrives at the brothel. Dante shows up and Javier tells them Lupe's death was an accident. He sends Lulu away, keeping Dante behind to "clean up," then goes to Lulu's hotel room, where he finds her passport and learns that she's Luke's daughter. Sonny asks Olivia to keep her ears open for anything Jax says or does that he might need to know about. Olivia refuses to choose sides, but when she learns that Jax plans to take Josslyn to Australia to see Jane, she looks like she might share the news. Kristina still won't leave Ethan alone, so he tries to call her bluff by inviting her on a road trip to Vegas. It actually works. Brenda thinks Sonny's acting weird, but he says he's just trying to keep them out of Carly and Jax's issues.

A fake rape attempt? Really, Sonny?

Oh, Molly. Can't you just read a book and chill out sometimes?

Why did Dante stay at the brothel when Lulu left? And how did Javier get to Lulu's room first? They obviously skipped a scene, since we saw Lulu leave, then suddenly Javier was in her room, and we never saw what happened to Dante. Also, poor Lupe.

I assume it will come up later that Olivia saw Grace at both Sonny's and Jax's?

July 15th, 2011

Lulu and Dante come up with a really stupid plan that Lulu thinks will get her the information she wants on Luke. Instead, Javier has Dante detained by thugs and plans to rape Lulu. Jax gets arrested and is unable to convince Ronnie that he's innocent. Brenda believes his theory that Sonny's behind his drugging and Grace's "attack," and she goes to confront him. Morgan and Molly send Carly an e-mail trying to make her think Anthony grabbed Josslyn, but she and Jason see right through it. Ethan's sure Kristina's getting over her crush on him, but Johnny isn't so sure. He's right: Kristina sweet-talks Sonny into giving her money, then tells Ethan she'll go to Vegas with him.

A woman in danger? This must have been before the head-writer switch.

I'm surprised Ronnie isn't on Jax's side, since he's incapable of feeling anything but hatred for Sonny.

Yes, Brenda, please make it all about you. We just can't get enough of that.

For a plan Molly said she and Morgan would have to think through carefully, they...sure didn't think it through clearly.

July 16th, 2011

Next week: Our long national Jax-related nightmare is over.

July 18th, 2011

Dante manages to convince one of Javier's henchmen to let him go, then saves Lulu before she can be raped and/or murdered. Javier spills that Luke is working on some sort of scheme involving gems and a woman - Helena. Lulu decides to pull a Lucky and torch the brothel. Brenda tells Sonny she's leaving him because, boo-hoo, Carly is too annoying. Carly wants to bust Morgan and Molly, but Jason urges her to wait them out. They ask Kristina and Ethan to give them any help they can, and Kristina figures out where her brother and sister are and ends the charade. Carly's relieved that everything ended before Jax could even find out Josslyn was gone. Jax tells Michael that if Carly bails him out of lockup, he'll take it as a sign that she wasn't involve in his framing. Jason warns Carly not to fall into any traps, so she stays put. When Jax is released, he heads straight to Carly and tells her he doesn't believe she's innocent (after all, this wouldn't be the first time she�d drugged someone). Olivia tells Steven about seeing Grace with Sonny before she accused Jax of assault. She knows she could easily use the information to help Jax, but she admits that she doesn't want to go against Sonny.

I have so much to say just about the Lulu/Dante plot: 1) Lulu really thought Luke was running some sort of scam with Laura? 2) Are we to assume that Dante Lorena Bobbitted Javier? 3) What's with Spencers and fire? 4) Thank goodness Guza's gone, because I really, really do not need to see another woman almost get raped on this show.

Other people I'm grateful are (almost) gone: Brenda and Jax. Take your whiny, entitled, self-righteous, holier-than-thou butts somewhere else. No, faster than that.

(Though I did enjoy Jax ribbing Carly about drugging A.J. That was kind of awesome.)

Wait, Alexis was home when Molly got there? I thought no one could reach her. I'm sure Jax appreciates the fact that she was hanging around the house while he was in lockup.

Dear writers, I sense that you're thinking about putting Sonny and Olivia back together, what with her I-wish-I-could-quit-him attitude today. Do not - I repeat - DO NOT do it. Steven doesn't deserve that.

July 19th, 2011

Sonny's plan goes exactly as he hoped, and Carly gets full custody of Josslyn, even though she doesn't want it. Brenda, just leave already. Lucky and Elizabeth try to keep up a family-dinner tradition with Cameron and Aiden, though they do allow Siobhan to crash it. Molly's all, "Love never lasts, waaaah!" and Sam and Jason are all, "Uh...thanks?" Jason wants to do something romantic with Sam, and there's no way she's dumb enough not to know what's going on.

That's probably the first time Carly has ever been praised for cooperating. And it'll probably be the last.

Siobhan and Brenda would get along well.

Apparently Alan's coming back now? Hey, writers, if you want to pretend he never died, I will totally look the other way and go with it.

Spinelli bought $400 worth of cupcakes? Now I want to be friends with Spinelli.

July 20th, 2011

Jax is mad, blah blah blah. Brenda's leaving Sonny, blah blah blah. Carly tells her to go back to Sonny or she'll take him back herself. She also tells Sonny that Brenda will probably come back, which she does, but since Carly's still there, it's probably not going to work out. Jason tells Maxie he's going to propose to Sam, and she takes over the planning of the grand event. Then she drops the ring off the balcony. Sam hesitantly tries to tell Alexis that she and Jason are getting serious. Siobhan accuses Elizabeth of using Jake's death to get sympathy, so Elizabeth kicks her out.

So Jax, it's totally okay for you to take Josslyn away from Carly, but it's completely unacceptable for her to take Josslyn away from you? I HATE YOU. Get off my TV. NOW.

Take that simpering shrew Brenda with you, too.

And Siobhan. Seriously, can we just round up all the annoying characters and have them all die in a plane crash or something?

Maxie: "It's the ring Prince William gave to Kate Middleton." Jason, if I were writing for him: "I don't know what any of those words mean."

July 21st, 2011

Brenda finally takes Alec and jets off to Rome, accepting a last-minute offer from Jax to fly with him. Jax is taking his ball and going home, telling everyone he's going off on business. Alexis gives Sam her blessing, and Sam tells her that if Jason does propose, she's going to say yes. Despite the loss of the ring, Jason asks Sam to marry him, and despite what she told Alexis, she takes her time answering, telling Jason that she doesn't want him to propose because he thinks that will make her happy. He admits that he actually wants to get married, and she accepts. Left ringless, Jason gives her a bolt. Sonny learns that Brenda and Jax left the country together and decides to go off on his own trip.

They're gone! They're gone! Hallelujah! If I cared, I might ask if Jax is even allowed to leave the country. But I don't, so I won't. Good riddance!

I always like Jason and Sam's dialogue. I think they communicate with each other really well, and they say things people in a relationship should actually be saying to each other. I really enjoyed their scenes together today. I just wish Maxie had run in with the ring at the last second.

Why didn't we get to see Jax say goodbye to Alexis? Alexis even mentioned their marriage today! She's the one person in town who can actually tolerate him! Why do I feel ripped off?

Look on the bright side, Carly - now Shawn can hang out with you again!

July 22nd, 2011

Mac reluctantly gives Lucky a case involving a prescription-drug ring at the hospital. It's nice timing for Lucky, since Elizabeth has just been reinstated at the hospital and can help him keep an eye out. Lucky's first step is to contact an old dealer, which is probably a really, really bad move. Steven begs Elizabeth to continue her leave of absence, and Siobhan's ticked that her suspension's already over. Lulu and Dante are now in Greece, where she has him infiltrate Helena's household staff to find out what Luke's up to. Helena is somewhat suspicious, but more interested in the idea of a new boytoy. Maxie tries to re-Spinelli Spinelli, with poor results. Patrick, Matt, and Steven commiserate over Robin's new rules and policies, which are driving them crazy. Matt gets Patrick to try to loosen Robin up so all their lives will be easier. Anthony again asks to invest in ELQ, mentioning a deal Edward and Tracy were hoping to land, but which was supposed to be a secret. Anthony's hoping to make Tracy suspicious about Michael's loyalties, which is exactly what happens.

Didn't we do a prescription-drug plot a few years ago? With Ian? And Matt was a suspect, because he was new in town and no one knew he was Noah's son? Anyone?

Yes, Dante, take off your shirt! Listen to the old woman!

Mmmm, that evidence looks good.

They're recasting Kate. But I love Megan Ward! Though this probably answers the question of who Sonny will be with next.

July 23rd, 2011

Next week: Did you miss Nikolas? You can have him back. For one day. Also, Monica gets to do stuff.

July 25th, 2011

Helena lets Dante know that she knows exactly who he is, then tries to convince him and Lulu that their relationship is doomed. She adds that Luke is on his way to meet her but she'll let Lulu go in her place. Lulu is dumb enough to believe her and Dante is dumb enough to leave her alone there. Lucky tries to get Siobhan to calm down, then counterintuitively tells her about his new assignment. Siobhan fills Ethan in, asking him to talk some sense into Lucky, which he attempts but isn't successful in doing. Siobhan blasts Elizabeth for supporting Lucky in his new assignment, telling her over and over that she's self-absorbed and accusing her of wanting Lucky to crack so he'll go back to her. She's bold/hateful enough to say that Jake died because Elizabeth was too wrapped up in her paternity-test scheming to pay attention to him. Spinelli spots Johnny at the bakery he thinks is a mob front and heads over to confront him. Maxie gets there first and asks Johnny to pretend he's intimidated. Anthony shows up in the middle of everything and tells Spinelli he's right about them using the cupcakes for contraband. It doesn't seem to be true, but it may have given him an idea. Steven asks Elizabeth to reconsider coming back to work, then asks Robin to withdraw her reinstatement. Both conversations go nowhere. Robin busts Patrick for his machinations but will probably still submit to his hospital picnic anyway.

Writers, can you stop making Dante and Lulu so dumb? Thanks.

The Ethan/Lucky scenes would have made more sense if they were Nikolas/Lucky scenes.

They should've killed Siobhan off in the OR. Yeah, Elizabeth would've gotten in a lot of trouble, but we'd all be a lot better off.

Maxie and Johnny have become one of my favorite pairs to watch. They have better chemistry than some of the actual romantic couples on the show.

July 26th, 2011

Helena tries to play mind games with Lulu, saying she's trying to be like Laura because she doesn't know who she is. She wants to "free" Luke from his family ties to make him grateful, and therefore malleable, as well as hurt the Spencers. Lulu still wants to hang out and wait for Luke, but it's Nikolas who shows up instead. Siobhan lays into Elizabeth to the point where she goes crying to Jason for comfort. Later, Siobhan finds Elizabeth on the roof and practically threatens to throw her off. Monica confronts Jason about keeping Jake a secret, giving a picture of himself from his childhood. Patrick and Robin totally get it on in the hospital, but he still can't sway her when it comes to being chief of staff. Lucky scores some pills. Molly finds a scrap of paper in one of Stefan's old poetry books that indicates something bad is coming. Kristina asks Johnny to fire Ethan, which he does (though it's not clear if he's serious). Johnny also urges Ethan to be honest with Kristina about his feelings. Kristina's...sick?

Helena's totally right about Lulu trying to be like Laura. Nice observation.

I can't believe Elizabeth was the first person to find out about Sam and Jason's engagement. He should've told Monica!

I really hope it turns out that Siobhan suffered a massive personality shift when she was injured, and that's why she's acting like this. If not, "something wicked," kill the redhead!

Okay, guys, you can't wave around a photo of Jason as a kid and not show it to us.

So Epiphany interrupted Robin and Patrick, and then they...kept going? What weird people.

Lucky's dealer was in Pentonville at the same time Zacchara was. Hmmm...

Molly, your "something wicked" is named Franco, and he'll be here in September.

There's no way Kristina can be pregnant, right? Just checking. By the way, the last time she was seriously ill, Sam's baby saved her, so...you might need to get cracking, Sam and Jason.

Two different characters mentioned Stefan today - should I read anything into that?

July 27th, 2011

Helena urges Nikolas to show his true Cassadineness, and he warns her to be careful what she wishes for. Shawn and Carly chat about his time in Afghanistan and what he's missed in Port Charles before he heads to D.C. for a job possibility. Steven's turned on by the fact that Olivia can fix an air-conditioner. Siobhan continues to be a horrible, horrible person. Lucky seems tempted by the pills. Monica's upset with Elizabeth for not telling her about Jake. Jax...something.

Not that I don't appreciate Tyler Christopher getting to come back, at least for a day, but what was the point of that?

That makes two omens of something bad coming. If it's not Franco, who (or what) is it?

Geez, Monica, way to make Elizabeth's horrible day even worse.

I could never be a prescription-drug addict. For one thing, those pills are huge. How can people swallow them?

July 28th, 2011

Maxie takes Spinelli back to the sewers, telling him she's looking for the ring but really trying to remind him of some of their old times together. Spinelli finds frosting and thinks the tunnels are being used to traffic drugs. The two hear something, but before they can investigate, Maxie gets them caged in, which she's thrilled about. Nikolas acts really weird, acting like a Cassadine and telling Lulu she wants to be a hero just like Laura. She decides she's seen enough of her relatives' childhood homes and wants to go back to Port Charles. Helena asks Nikolas to stay in Greece, but he has other plans in mind. She calls someone to report that they're in something or another alone, but the Spencers are now more vulnerable than ever. Helena also meets with Luke, who has diamonds and somehow double-crossed Javier. Anthony tries again to get on Tracy's good side, then calls someone about a transfer of information. Alexis freaks out over Sam and Jason's engagement. Abby's still worried about Michael going to the dark side. Michael still needs therapy.

Did Nikolas hit his head or something? I don't get his behavior.

I wonder if fake Luke was played by the same person who used to play fake catatonic Laura.

As if Tracy or Anthony would ever set foot in Jake's. Although...didn't Tracy and Coleman once have some sort of deal going? Or am I thinking of someone else?

Michael's just now realizing that Sonny's gone? He's been out of town for a week! That's just sad.

July 29th, 2011

Lucky's dealer, J.T., is in Anthony's pocket, and Anthony puts the idea in his head that Lucky only bought from him in order to bust him. Siobhan catches Lucky going into her purse and accuses him of taking the pills he bought. This leads to another big fight, which ends with Siobhan in tears and Lucky going off to meet Elizabeth, who caught a new orderly acting squirrelly. Siobhan spies the two of them hugging, which makes her day even worse. J.T. finds Lucky and notes that he hasn't taken any pills, so he must be working a case. Lucky tries to get away, but two masked men ambush him and inject him with something. Patrick and Carly chat about the custody case and are a lot friendlier than Robin would like, so of course she catches them together. Patrick accuses her of being jealous, but Robin just wants to complain about all the wrongs Carly has done Sonny. Speaking of Sonny, he seems to be in Bensonhurst. Anthony still won't let up on Tracy. Siobhan isn't doing so hot. Carly learns from Elizabeth that Jason and Sam are engaged. Anthony sends someone a present, asking again for that "transfer of information." Someone's following Carly.

Why didn't J.T. just give Lucky a cupcake?

Dear tiny baby Jesus, please let the rumors about Siobhan dying by the end of the month be true.

Another new Emma? This one is by far the cutest of them all.

Please tell me I'm not the only person who thinks the orderly looked frighteningly like James Franco.

July 30th, 2011

Next week: "Jax has a picture of Josslyn." What kind of teaser is that??

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