Everyone gets emotional, especially Josslyn, who can't bring herself to stay for the whole reading. Then things threaten to get messy, because Oscar has left his ELQ shares to a surprise guest: Shiloh. Sam takes Carol's statement to the PCPD and presents it to Robert, Mac, and Chase. Robert doesn't think it can be useful, since there's no proof that it wasn't coerced, and there's no corroborating witness to back it up. Chase gets more and more frustrated over the fact that Willow's stuck in lockup while the rest of them are unable to do anything to help her. He and Sam discuss the possibility of getting Diane to subpoena Carol for Willow's defense, which could possibly lead to her testifying against Shiloh. Then Jason takes things into his own hands, turning himself in at the station with the news that he has a witness to back up Carol's story. Shiloh introduces himself to Sasha, who almost immediately pegs him as bad news. Michael literally tackles him to let him know it's not okay to talk to Sasha. This show of affection makes it a little harder for Sasha to stick to her agreement with Valentin to leave town after the wedding. A conversation with Carly about building a new life for herself helps her decide to stay in Port Charles. Kim feels so bad about her near-rape of Drew that she's willing to suffer any consequences, including criminal charges. Drew won't go that far, but he wants her to get help. Fortunately, she's already met with a psychiatrist and hopes to start getting better. While Brick finalizes Dev's paperwork and helps him learn the details of his fake life, Jason questions Sonny's decision to move a stranger into his house.

Don't worry, Qs – Shiloh will either be in prison or dead soon, so you'll get the shares back.

Sasha was a better judge of character in ten seconds (re: Shiloh) than most people on this show are over multiple years.

"What you did last night, it crossed a line," Drew says in the understatement of the decade.

How weird to see Carly actually liking someone Michael's with.

How about we stop treating Carly – who's been pregnant half a dozen times – like she doesn't know how to take care of herself?

July 11th, 2019

Jason brings in Harmony to tell Robert and Mac about Shiloh's crimes, which include embezzling from DOD members. She has copies of records attesting to that, but Robert knows that Shiloh will just accuse her of doctoring them. Jason brings up the drug Shiloh used to sedate Trust initiates, and Harmony details the initiation process and their use of the drug. In the end, Robert and Mac put protection in place for Carol, start to get the charges against Jason dropped, and get moving on tracking down Shiloh. The man in question is one step below gloating over his ELQ shares, which absolutely no one wants him to have. Fortunately, Michael knows that after the will was written, Oscar made an addendum designating his shares for a foundation. That plus delays Alexis can deploy will keep the will in probate for a long time, preventing Shiloh from ever actually getting the shares. Shiloh just brushes this off, turning his attention to "Wiley" when he gets a call letting him know the paternity-test results are in. Michael overhears him getting the call and alerts Sam and Jason that he's heading to GH. Lucas is already there, and is present when Shiloh gets the results. Meanwhile, Harmony is put in lockup with Willow and tells her she's going to testify against Shiloh and accept whatever punishment she's given. Willow is surprised to hear that her roommate is Nelle. Hayden continues walking around town like she didn't commit a crime and flee the country just a couple years ago. Finn finally gets her to talk to him, and though she doesn't disclose any secrets, he can sense that there's something she's not telling him. Chase is still annoyed with the justice system's failure to do anything for Willow, but he continues doing his job anyway. First he interviews Obrecht, who continues to believe she was pushed off the yacht (though she can't think of any suspects or motives, and gets distracted when Chase tells her Hayden was on board). Then he runs into Hayden and asks to have a chat. Franco asks Obrecht for details on the secret she said she was keeping about Brad, Lucas, and "Wiley." She walks back her drunken talk, but Elizabeth, who's just learned from Lucas that "Wiley"'s adoption could be in question, thinks she knows something.

What's with Robert and Mac letting Jason conducting the questioning of Harmony?

Shiloh's been stalking Sam for YEARS? He's really bad at it.

I can't believe Shiloh had the paternity test done in the lab where Brad works. When the results say he's not "Wiley"'s father, he's just going to accuse Brad of tampering with them.

Here's an amusing possibility: Hayden being put in lockup next to Willow, and Finn and Chase visiting them at the same time.

Chase, step it up. You left all three yacht suspects off your list.

July 12th, 2019

Shiloh spends so much time rubbing the test results in Lucas' face that he runs out of time to open them before Lucas attacks him. Jordan and Curtis are nearby, but both pretend they didn't see anything. Shiloh demands Lucas' arrest, so it's convenient that the acting commissioner arrives just then...only he's there to arrest Shiloh. Shiloh's in denial that Harmony would turn on him, and he figures that since he beat the charges before, he'll beat them again. Lucas has a hard time calming down after Shiloh came so close to reading the DNA results, so Sam tries to reassure him. When Michael joins them, he convinces Lucas to tear up the results without looking at them. Chase takes Hayden to the PCPD to interrogate her about possibly pushing Obrecht off the yacht. Hayden is surprised to learn that he's Finn's brother, and Chase is equally surprised to learn that Finn was engaged to someone before Anna. Hayden won't answer questions without a lawyer, but Chase presents a deal: He'll tell her a Finn story for every piece of information she gives him. Unfortunately, that bonding experience ends before it can begin when Chase has to admit that surveillance footage on the yacht shows that Hayden was never anywhere near Obrecht. Nina asks Jax about his relationship with Hayden, but he wants to keep their personal lives to themselves. As it turns out, Hayden and Jax aren't actually together, and she kissed him to either bug Finn or get his attention. Also, Jax is bringing her on as his CFO, so I guess she's staying in town. (Still no word on her kid.) Maxie and Peter go to Ithaca, but Dante refuses to see them. Maxie forces her way into the room where he's hanging out, and seconds later, someone gets shot. Sonny fills Dev in on some of his enemies to look out for, including Jax. Dev wants to be a mini-Sonny, and has no interest in going to school in the fall. Sonny won't entertain the idea of hiring Dev for the organization and instead sends him to the Metro Court for work. Dev's pickpocket instincts kick in and he's about to snag Laura's purse when Jason catches him. Lulu tells Laura how hard it is to have Dante out of touch, even though she knows he's trying to do what's best for himself. Ultimately, it's too much for her and she asks Sonny to track him down again. Michael tells Willow that Shiloh's about to be arrested, but he's also about to get the paternity test results. He's not worried about them, though, since they're not admissible in court. As soon as Shiloh's in custody, the judge agrees to let Willow go, so she's free while Shiloh's in lockup. Valentin tells Nina that Curtis found files on him and Cassandra in Jax's office and hasn't been able to find out what's in them yet. Nina first wants to share this with Drew, but then she realizes the significance of Jax having a file on Cassandra when he has no reason to know about her connection to Nina and Valentin unless he's been in touch with Cassandra himself. It's basically an afterthought that Jordan's doing well enough to possibly go back to work already.

WE WERE SO CLOSE TO MOVEMENT ON THE BABY SWAP. THANKS, MICHAEL.

Shiloh's been assaulted three times in three episodes (by Michael, Drew, and Lucas), and really, it couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

Oh, so we really are pretending that Hayden didn't commit a bunch of crimes last time she was in town.

Aha! Hayden and Jax being together never made sense, since he moved to town without her and never mentioned to Josslyn that he was dating someone.

Make me care about Dev, show. I dare you.

I wonder how Drew will react when he learns that Jax hired Hayden.

July 15th, 2019

Dante shoots Peter, who's not injured too badly and handles the whole thing much more calmly than Maxie does. At the very least, this makes Maxie see with her own eyes that Dante isn't himself right now. She blames herself for dragging Peter along after he and multiple other people told her to leave things alone, but Finn thinks she should forgive herself, since she had good intentions. Lulu may not feel the same way. Instead of lecturing Dev or telling Sonny what he did, Jason first talks to Carly about what he's like. She thinks he's mostly a good kid, and she and Sonny really want to help him. Jason chooses to keep Dev's near-theft of Laura's purse to himself but warns Dev to make better decisions so Jason won't have to save him from himself. This is similar to how Jason always has to save Carly, though Sonny and Carly both think Dev is more like Sonny. Kristina's gone from being at the center of one of the biggest plotlines to eavesdropping while Ava and Julian talk about Sibley. Julian thinks Ava's being used, Ava's desperate to contact Kiki, Kristina thinks Sibley is the real deal, blah blah blah. Lulu is torn between wanting Dante back, fearing that they won't make it if he doesn't come home, and knowing he needs to get help. Alexis and Julian call a truce, but that's never going to last once she finds out about his part in the baby swap. Laura and Hayden catch up and discuss fresh starts and stuff. Finn talks to Alexis a little about Hayden's return and how they've both moved on.

Maxie made Peter wait an hour and a half for medical treatment because she doesn't know if doctors in Ithaca are trustworthy? And then he was treated by some no-name doctor at GH? Okay.

No mention of how Maxie might be traumatized not just because of Peter's shooting but also because Nathan was shot?

"Grief makes people do desperate things." Yeah, but at least Ava's not committing a crime by seeing a psychic, so just leave her alone and worry about Kim, Julian.

Speaking of things we're pretending about Hayden: She and Laura are basically friends now.

Also, I guess someone explained the Jason/Drew thing to Hayden, since she didn't ask who Drew was when Laura mentioned him.

July 16th, 2019

Peter swears Finn to secrecy about his shooting, not wanting it to bring Anna back to town for a mother/son reunion. Robert has already heard through WSB channels and offers to tell Anna himself, since he's not restrained by HIPAA. Finn worries that that will ruin whatever relationship Peter and Anna have started to build, which is just a bonus for Robert. Lulu gets mad at Maxie for meddling, as if she didn't just ask Sonny to do exactly what Maxie did. Laura helps Lulu see that Maxie didn't mean to cause a disaster, so they make up pretty quickly. Also, Lulu's convinced that this means Dante will never go back to normal, so now she can move on. Sibley channels Kiki, who doesn't want to talk to Ava and refuses to ever have anything to do with her again. Ava's like, "Well, you hurt me, too," because why not fight with the spirit of your murdered daughter? Kiki goes away, then comes back long enough to say that she wants Avery to know she misses her. Ava considers that an insult. She asks Sibley to channel Nikolas next, but Sibley can't find him "on the other side." Drew is unhappy to learn that Jax has hired Hayden as his CFO. Jax knows all about Hayden's criminal history and tendency to do things like steal money from the company she's working for, but he's not bothered by it. Drew figures there must be something else going on there, and he's right – Jax and Hayden are plotting to somehow take down Valentin. Drew won't tell Curtis who drugged him, since the person realized what a mistake she'd made and wants to make amends. Kim worries that Julian will want to break up in the wake of what she almost did to Drew, but Julian understands that her grief made her make bad decisions, and he still wants to be with her. Nina asks Curtis to feed her any information he gets on Jax before he gives it to Valentin.

Finn, why are you blaming Peter for being shot?

So...does this mean Dante's never coming back?

Only Ava would have someone channel her daughter, then have a fight with her.

Just for the record: a) Nikolas' body was never found, b) they've been mentioning him a lot lately, and c) Tyler Christopher left Days of Our Lives.

Can we send Sibley around town to psychically read people and spill their secrets?

I'm not sure how working at Aurora will help Jax and Hayden ruin Valentin, but I'm willing to be patient and find out.

July 17th, 2019

Josslyn starts to see that her behavior toward Dev isn't always warranted, and he must have had a tough life in Turkey, so she should be kinder. Carly tells her that his presence in their house is a family decision, so if she ever decides she really can't handle him being there, she should speak up. It turns out Carly herself is under the impression that this is just a temporary arrangement, and she thinks boarding school is a good option for Dev. As he listens in, Sonny tells Carly that he wants Dev to want to be with them. Carly agrees to keep him there, which pleases Dev. Diane tells Willow, Brad, Lucas, and Alexis that while Shiloh's facing criminal charges, all of his attempts to get "Wiley" have been suspended. If he somehow manages to get out from under all the charges, he'll have to start the custody case over from the beginning. That means, at least for right now, "Wiley" isn't going anywhere. After a brief celebration, Lucas makes the excellent point that they should get Shiloh's medical records in case there's anything in them they need to know for "Wiley." Nina still thinks Obrecht fell off the yacht, and she still thinks she was pushed, though she's willing to accept that Hayden probably wasn't the culprit. An Insider column about Shiloh leads to Nina discovering that Willow was once involved with him, which makes her realize that she may have been the reason he found out he had a child. Sonny warns Ava not to say anything more to Avery about possibly talking to Kiki. Julian admits that he agrees, though he waits until Sonny's gone before he says that. Ava tells him that the channeling actually made her feel better – if Sibley had said Kiki was happy to hear from Ava, Ava would have been suspicious, but since Kiki was mad, that must have really been her. Now Ava's determined to convince Kiki that she really feels bad about the way things were between them when Kiki died. Trina's a little suspicious of Dev's criminal instincts and devotion to Sonny. Josslyn tries to keep his cover, and even defends him Franco and Elizabeth tell Cameron he can keep Oscar's car, as long as he behaves himself and helps pay any associated costs. While looking at pictures from the reception, they spot someone watching Franco and Obrecht while they were discussing "Wiley." Brad seems to have nefarious plans for Obrecht.

Do I get a vote on what happens with Dev? I vote for boarding school. I have no use for him.

Josslyn's shirt is uglier than Valentin's soul.

"If Dev was three years older, I'd have him live with Milo and Epiphany." Yeah, like Epiphany would agree to that.

Honestly, Elizabeth and Franco lucked out. Cameron will never bug them for a car, and they didn't even have to pay for it.

July 18th, 2019

Nina feels horrible that she may have tipped Shiloh off to the fact that he has a child. Obrecht hints that he may not be the father after all, but the conversation gets interrupted before she can elaborate. Franco and Elizabeth take the pictures to the PCPD, then tell Obrecht that they think she was pushed after all, but by a man, judging from the clothes. She goes back to keeping mum about any secrets she might be in on. Willow can't have her old job back after all, thanks to the contempt-of-court stuff, but she has a lead on a job being a governess. The whole audience: "Well, obviously it's for Charlotte." Willow: "I have no idea who I would be working for." The whole audience: "Freaking A." When she finds out she'd be working for Valentin and Nina, she immediately backs out, running off before Nina can apologize for screwing up her life. Sasha tells Valentin that she's staying in town, which he predictably doesn't like. He reminds her that the risk of Nina finding out the truth goes up as long as she's around. She reminds him that they both want her to be happy, and if having Sasha around is what makes her happy, they all win. The Morgans discuss tattoo removal and moving on from the whole Shiloh thing. Jordan and Curtis are very cute, and are happy that Jordan's almost healthy enough to have sex again. ELQ and the PCPD play each other in a softball game. It may just be an excuse to put Chase, Michael, and Mac in uniforms.

Nina's a "crusader for children"...how?

Mac and Jordan: (giggling over Obrecht's attack). Mac ten minutes later: "We're taking this very seriously."

As if anyone in town other than Valentin would want a governess.

Speaking of tattooed Trust members, where did Daisy end up?

July 19th, 2019

Thanks to Daisy, Shiloh's out on bail and sure he'll eventually beat all the charges. He tells Laura that one day, they'll be working together to improve the town. Unfortunately for him, his money has all been frozen, and Daisy's used the last of her trust fund on his bail, so he has no money for a lawyer. Shiloh and Daisy go to Charlie's to make amends with Kristina, but she's in no mood for their attempts to win her back. With her family's support and love, she plans to testify against Shiloh and protect any victims he might have his eye on. Shiloh then visits Harmony, who's just learned from Willow that he was arrested. Willow wants Harmony to keep her distance from Shiloh, and though Harmony accepts Shiloh's visit, she's grown a backbone and orders him to stay away from her, Willow, and "Wiley." Drew and Jason start fulfilling their promise to Oscar by working on the treehouse, then voluntarily hanging out together at the Floating Rib. They discuss Oscar's ELQ shares and the legal complications that have developed from his conflicting designations. That leads to a conversation about Shiloh and why he was so interested in Drew when he first came to town. Jason guesses that Drew knows something about Shiloh that Shiloh is glad he doesn't remember. Shiloh shows up and can't keep his mouth shut about how he cared for Oscar after he left home, and the rewards he's going to reap from Oscar's trust in him. Drew and Jason aren't sure that Shiloh and Drew were actually buddies in Afghanistan, as Shiloh claims, but a flashback reveals that at the very least, they knew each other by name. Willow's having a good day, with Shiloh in custody and her relationship with Harmony improving. It gets even better when Nina apologizes for the Shiloh stuff, which Willow graciously forgives her for, noting that the truth would have come out eventually. Chase has to reluctantly ruin it all by telling Willow that Shiloh made bail. Jordan and Curtis go to Pentonville so Jordan can thank Ryan for the kidney donation (uh, not that he actually had anything to do with it). Ryan taunts that her morals are now as compromised as Curtis' are, and things will only get worse with a serial killer's body part inside her. Jordan isn't thrilled about the way the donation happened, but it's not like she's going to give the kidney back, so she's just going to find a way to move on. After all the struggles he's had over the year, Aiden gets a fun, carefree day (and lots of baking-related gifts) at his birthday party. Ryan meets Harmony, who's on library duty at the prison, and takes a copy of Shiloh's book off her hands. Dante sends Lulu divorce papers. Elizabeth still thinks Hayden's keeping secrets.

Oh, there's Daisy. Learning nothing and making no progress.

I highly doubt that Shiloh's allowed to have any contact with Harmony.

That spine looks good on you, Harmony.

Ryan, you're in prison for life (I assume). It doesn't matter how many kidneys you have. Move on.

I just realized that now we have a Hayden and an Aiden. That could get confusing.

It would be hilarious if Ryan changed his whole demeanor and became a good person because of Shiloh's teachings.

July 22nd, 2019

Lulu has 20 days to either fight or accept Dante's divorce filing; if she does nothing, he can proceed. Olivia votes fight, while Laura tells Lulu she needs to decide what's best for her and the kids. Lulu doesn't think it matters, since either way, Dante might never come back. Olivia thinks she and Sonny could change Dante's mind if they had access to him, but Sonny suspects that he's going to cut his parents out of his life as well. Shiloh enrages Drew by mentioning Oscar and the ELQ shares, and Curtis has to pull Drew off Shiloh before any blood is shed. While Curtis encourages Drew to leave Shiloh in the past and stop wasting energy on him, Shiloh has more flashbacks, finally letting us discover the dirt Drew would have on him if he hadn't lost his memories: Shiloh and a buddy named Tex were selling oil to insurgents, and if Drew had had the chance to turn him in, Shiloh would be on the hook for treason. Shiloh is now focused on getting the million dollars he got from the sale, and...something about Kim that I'm not quite clear on. Ava's Crimson article is almost ready for publication, but Jax isn't pleased, since Nina didn't tell him about all of Ava's past misdeeds. (To be fair, that would take a long time.) When he mentions that she was present when Valentin killed Nikolas (...allegedly), Nina defends her fiancé, then angrily asks Jax what he knows about Cassandra. Valentin walks in at that exact moment, but he and Jax both keep poker faces, and Jax doesn't give up any information. Jordan urges Stella to pay the subscription fee and find out who her long-lost relative is. Stella spends, like, ten minutes saying she doesn't need to dig into any family secrets, then admits that she already paid the fee, but the match didn't, so she's stuck. Jordan offers to do some digging around for her. Alexis and Neil spend more of a therapy session discussing whether she still needs his help instead of the stuff that brought her there in the first place. He thinks she should go on a date to see if his guidance has helped her figure out her issues with men. Alexis basically says that she's fine never dating again.

Two things that cracked me up today: 1) Sonny greeting a softball-uniform-wearing Olivia with, "Hey, batter batter." 2) Alexis turning Neil's statues around so they weren't looking at her.

Nina, stop saying things you'll regret when you finally realize what a horrible person Valentin is.

If Curtis and Jordan don't want Stella's groceries, I'll take them. Anything to save me a trip to the store.

Another Jerry mention! Thanks, Neil!

July 23rd, 2019

Maxie's solution to Lulu's woes is a night out drinking. They run into one of Lulu's fake dates, Dustin, and though the three have a nice conversation, Lulu ruins it by blurting out that her husband served her with divorce papers. Maxie decides that taking your depressed friend out when she can't stop crying is a bad idea. Josslyn needs to use an inside voice when discussing Dev's criminal leanings (even when she's outside), because Trina and Cameron almost hear their conversation. Remembering how the will reading made her feel sends Josslyn to the bridge, where Cameron's most recent community-service task was removing the locks hung there, including Oscar and Josslyn's. Dev follows her there and comforts her. Maxie volunteers Peter to watch Rocco, who's struggling with Dante being gone and worries that he wasn't ready to be a father. Peter can relate a little, since he didn't have his mother around when he was a kid, and he assures Rocco that Dante's departure has nothing to do with him. Michael was planning to take Sasha to the island this weekend, but he needs to postpone so he can attend "Wiley"'s first birthday party. Lucy thinks Sasha has model potential and says that a few years ago, she would have made a great Face of Deception. Sasha almost panics until Lucy explains what she means. She tells Michael she did try modeling right after high school, which he notes is the first piece of information she's told him about her past. Curtis has tried to figure out why Jax has a file on Cassandra but I think is more interested in why he has one on Valentin. Valentin tries to get in touch with Anna, then goes to Finn when she won't take his call. Finn has pretty much figured out that Nina was the one who put Cassandra in the coma, but he's not going to say anything, since he knows it had to have been in self-defense. Hayden's still being all secretive and stuff. Sonny and Carly discuss a bunch of stuff and contribute nothing to the episode.

Being depressed is not excuse for whatever Lulu was wearing today.

I can't tell if Trina's trying to get to know Dev better because she likes him or because she's vetting him for Josslyn.

Heh, of course Michael's taking Sasha to the island.

At this point, I'm less interested in Hayden telling Finn about the baby than I am in just knowing what happened to him or her.

Thanks for doing nothing today, Carly and Sonny. It was a great use of everyone's time.

July 25th, 2019

It's Wiley and Jonah's birthdays, and Michael and Willow chat about their respective losses and how the past year has been for them. Michael wants to focus on what he has rather than what he's lost, which means celebrating "Wiley"'s birthday even when he can't celebrate Jonah's. Nelle calls Michael from prison, but he knows she's going to use Jonah to manipulate him, so he won't accept the call. Josslyn laments the loss of the lock, which Cameron confesses he removed. While he and Dev go Dumpster-diving and retrieve it, Josslyn tells Trina that she dreads the day she starts getting over Oscar because she's afraid she'll be disrespecting her memory. Trina reminds her that Oscar never wanted anyone to cry over his death, so he won't be upset to see her move on. Nina tries again to get Jax to talk about Cassandra, but he claims he's not familiar with her. He asks her and Valentin to dinner, and Nina makes arrangements for the three of them and Hayden to eat together at Wyndemere. She tells Curtis this will give her the opportunity to ask more questions. Jax also has an ulterior motive – he and Hayden will have access to Wyndemere so they can search it. Robert has heard about Finn's call to Anna about Valentin and Cassandra, and he tells Finn that Cassandra has been spotted in Europe with an unidentified man. Carly tells Jason about the baby's spina bifida and how scared she is for what it could mean. Jason realizes later that the Corinthoses have told so few people that even Michael doesn't know. Meanwhile, the Corinthoses learn that the baby will need surgery right after birth. Chase has a bunch of stuff planned to keep Willow's mind off of Wiley's birthday. They both mention that they want children in the future, a topic Chase wants to discuss because that's what people in love do. This leads to them saying "I love you" for the first time. Chase tries to draw some more information out of Finn about his past, since he never knew Finn and Hayden almost got married. Finn tells him a little about the relationship and the baby, but he doesn't want to go into any details. Sonny bugs Robert about Dante and Shiloh, and Robert tells him they're going to need to develop some boundaries now that he's the DA.

Cam, next can you find the dragon and the phoenix?

Do you think Curtis says anything to his friends more often than, "What the hell were you thinking?"

Chase was adorable today, with his declaration of love for Willow and his discussion of having kids and his threat to hug Finn.

I want to go to the outdoor screening of The Princess Bride! Or, as a second choice, I will binge-watch the first five seasons of Grey's Anatomy with Trina.

It makes me so happy every time Michael Easton remembers to clean his silverware before he eats.

Robert's accent makes "Shiloh" sound like "Charlotte," which could lead to some interesting misunderstandings.

July 26th, 2019

Everyone's thrilled with "In the Garden of Good and Ava," except Ava herself. She finally figures out that Nina's plan all along was to expose her vanity and self-centeredness while reaping the benefits of ad sales and increased circulation. Ava says she's been where Nina is now, and Nina should be careful because she has a long way to fall. Carly and Jax celebrate Crimson's success, but also lament together that they're the reason Nelle is in Michael's life. Jax is sure that Michael will be smart and won't let Nelle get into his head. Later, Nina asks Carly what Jax is like, and Carly has only good things to say. Nelle guilts Michael into visiting her, to Carly's dismay. Harmony realizes that Jonah and Wiley had the same birthday, and she and Nelle discuss how important it is for parents to protect their children. For the first time, Nelle learns exactly what kind of threat Shiloh could offer to "Wiley" (and to her master plan). Chase shows Obrecht an enlarged picture from the reception, but it's impossible to tell who the person is watching her and Franco. Valentin comes to take her to Wyndemere, since Nina wants her to stay there until her attacker is found, and I don't think Obrecht gets that he should be on her suspect list. Ava has hired another psychic, Chelsea, who tells Franco that Kiki's happy he's happy, then warns him not to take a drive. Chelsea also has the same message for Ava that Sibley relayed from Kiki: Leave her alone. Hayden and Chase agree to wipe the slate clean now that she's staying in town.

Please tell me Jax isn't still in love with Carly. Please tell me we're not going back to that love triangle.

That Crimson issue is huge. Are September issues really that big?

Do we need another medium? Can't Olivia just be psychic again?

I am completely serious when I say that after Nina and Valentin inevitably break up, he should get together with Ava. At the very least, they should have hate sex.

July 29th, 2019

Nelle is supposedly about to tell Michael the truth about Jonah when she sees a text Carly sent him including a photo of Sasha with "Wiley." Nelle's upset about Carly's involvement and just says she had a dream about Jonah and some angels. Michael tells her they're done for good and she'll never see him again. Nelle tells Harmony that she changed her mind about spilling the truth because Michael didn't deserve it. She encourages Harmony to do whatever's necessary to keep "Wiley" from Shiloh. Willow tells Julian she's lifting the ban on him spending time with "Wiley," so he can go to his "grandson"'s first birthday party. Lucas then invites Willow, and he and Brad tell her they'd love for her to be a part of "Wiley"'s life. Shiloh crashes the party to blah about being with his son and eventually getting custody. His present is hard to resist, though – it's his medical records. Brad grabs them before anyone can look at them, and Michael roughs Shiloh up and literally throws him out of the party. This isn't a deal-breaker for Sasha, by the way. Shiloh has a new lawyer, Elena, who's upfront about his poor chances for beating all the charges against him. His options are to plead not guilty, go to trial, and most likely go to jail for life, or plead guilty and do 14-20 years. Shiloh's confident that he'll get away with everything and eventually get "Wiley," but he's also considering disappearing. He'll need resources for that, and that's somehow connected to Drew. Chelsea tells Ava yet a-freaking-gain that Kiki doesn't want to talk to her and is still upset with her. Specifically, she's upset that Ava fell in love with a serial killer (to be fair, she didn't know he was one) who encouraged all of her bad qualities (okay, that's fair). Chelsea says something about Ryan still having Ava's heart, so Ava goes to see him at Pentonville. Drew learns that Oscar and his assistant conspired months ago to get the Navy to send Drew his military medals. Franco praises Drew for all his heroics, but since one of those heroics involved saving Shiloh, it's kind of bittersweet. Drew wishes he remembered everything about their shared past, but if his only way of getting the truth is using the flash drive, he'll just stay in the dark.

But WHY was Nelle going to tell Michael the truth? I don't by that she would just have a change of heart out of the blue.

Sam missed her godson's birthday party because...?

I'm enjoying the continuing trend of Shiloh getting beaten up in, like, every other episode.

Kiki's condition for speaking to Ava again should be therapy. Because...come on.

"How could I be friends with a guy like that?" Drew asks his new BFF, Franco.

Franco ate something – drink!

July 30th, 2019

Obrecht moves into Wyndemere, where Valentin barely hides his disdain for her and keeps making comments about how she almost drowned. He's decided it's better for Sasha to stay in town than to leave, though Obrecht remains a loose end that hasn't been tied up. Thanks to Ava's article, Crimson is doing awesome, so Nina's in a great mood and really looking forward to getting married in September. Sasha's looking forward to leaving town with Michael and getting away from the crazy people. Ava wants Ryan to apologize to Kiki so her soul will be at peace, which will then somehow help mother and daughter repair their relationship. Ryan berates her for listening to a psychic and trying to turn away from the evil person she is. Ava tells him she wishes the people who stole his kidney had left him dead. Jordan has learned that Stella's long-lost relative appears to be a closer relation than they thought – close enough that she and Curtis suspect that Stella had a child she secretly gave for adoption years ago. Stella denies this and continues to push back at their desire to press the issue. Drew shows Kim his medals and shares his regret over saving Shiloh's life, even if he didn't know then the sort of person Shiloh was. Kim points out that he also saved Tex (though in Shiloh's flashback, Drew said he didn't survive, so...I don't know), who might be able to provide some information on Shiloh. It's a good thing Drew hired Curtis to do security for Aurora, because it's badly needed, since Shiloh's able to get someone to break into Drew's safe and steal the flash drive. Lulu's doing totally fine, if totally fine means day-drinking and yelling at Peter for saying that Dante's departure is selfish. Shiloh continues proving his idiocy by trying to chat with Danny while Sam and Jason are nearby. Jason is three seconds from beating him up, child witness or no child witness.

Best parts of today's episode: 1) Lulu drunkenly saying she writes great article, and Wes Ramsey's delivery of, "I know. I publish them." 2) Nina exclaiming over a text message, and Obrecht asking whose body was found. 3) Stella middle-naming Curtis, which I think made Briana Nicole Henry break.

How does Ryan apologizing to Kiki repair her relationship with Ava?

If Ryan committed rape by deception, then guess what, Ava? You did the same to Morgan. Also, interesting that a few years ago, the showrunner dismissed a fan who said Elizabeth did this to Drew, but now it's being acknowledged.

Yes, Obrecht, there is an "alarmingly low number of convictions" of criminals in Port Charles. You would know.

Peter, as usual, you're not helping. Shut it.

Hilariously, just as Jason was threatening Shiloh, a chyron came on my screen that said, "Severe thunderstorm warning: Morgan."

I love Morgan Family Togetherness Time as much as the next person, but it's no excuse for Sam missing "Wiley"'s party.

July 31st, 2019

Finn goes to Wyndemere to let Valentin and Nina know that Cassandra has resurfaced with an unknown companion. As he's leaving, Jax and Hayden arrive for the world's most awkward dinner party/secret hunt for something unnamed. Things start off horribly when Valentin remembers that Hayden used to live there with Nikolas (whom he killed), and Jax remarks that of course Valentin and Nikolas never got to know each other well, because of the murder and all. Valentin plans to slip Jax some truth serum so he'll spill his ties to Cassandra, but loud thunder outside distracts Valentin, and the drinks don't go to their intended recipients. Then, to make things even more awkward, the thunderstorm strands Finn on the island and in the house with his ex. Drew tells Shiloh that he regrets saving him in Afghanistan and is going to talk to Tex about everything that happened there. Shiloh tells him that Tex is dead, but Drew still thinks he can get to the truth. When he gets to his burglarized office, he realizes that the flash drive has been taken, and he, Jason, Sam, and Curtis easily agree that Shiloh was probably the culprit. They don't think he took it to destroy it, but they also don't think he's holding it for ransom. Shiloh is five steps ahead of them, having already figured out what to do with it. He meets with Cabot to determine if the memories from the flash drive can be implanted in someone else, such as Jason. In Puerto Rico, Sasha encounters Cassandra, who easily gets her to open up about Nina and Valentin. Michael finds Cassandra familiar, and Cassandra has a weapon ready in case she needs to silence him. Sonny offers Neil any favor he may ever want as thanks for helping out with Kristina. He also wants to make sure that Neil will never write about Kristina in a book. Like Diane, Sonny has done his research into Neil's personal life and knows that his daughter, Joanna, was in a cult. He guesses that after Neil tried to get her out, she killed herself. Diane is now a devoted Alexis/Neil shipper and urges Alexis to make a move. Alexis admits that she might be okay with never dating again, which cracks Diane up. As Neil is rushing to be somewhere, he and Alexis get stuck in a Metro Court elevator together. Maxie and Peter are the filler.

Fingers crossed that Hayden got the truth serum.

"Why were the two of you coming to see Drew in the first place?" Well, to break into his safe, of course! Come on, Curtis.

I don't get why Shiloh would want to put Drew's memories in Jason. Why not use a Shilohtologist?

The WSB let Cabot go? Why do they suck so much??

Me at the beginning of the episode: "Ugh, Michael and Sasha are going to be boring." Me halfway in: "...Never mind."

Are Maxie and Peter ever going to get something to do other than talk about other people's secrets and hidden agendas?

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