General Hospital blog - June, 2007

June 1st, 2007

Lucky arrests Jason in front of Elizabeth and Jake. Sonny has Jason shoot down a statue Kate is having brought in via helicopter. After he learns that the statue had sentimental value, Sonny asks Carly to help him find another one. And then there’s something with sprinklers and Sonny and Kate should just make out already. Jerry sneaks into the PCPD to steal the blood samples that will prove he’s Craig. Robin and Patrick still have a boatload of issues and are possibly still in junior high, but at least they both hate Scott. I seriously couldn’t care less about what Sam and Amelia have to say to each other.

I know Carly is going to do something completely childish with regards to this statue, but I still can’t wait to find out what happens. Sometimes she’s hilarious when she’s petty and territorial.

See what happens when you kill people, Jason? You get arrested in front of your four-month-old newborn son.

I wonder if Kin Shriner enjoys knowing that he was brought back mostly so people could hate him. I would probably have a problem with that. Unless, of course, he just really needs the money.

Next week: Patrick gives Robin a note that says, “Do you still like me? Check yes or no.”

June 4th, 2007

Elizabeth protests Jason’s arrest but there’s nothing she can do about it. Kate is also arrested when she hits an officer trying to take her in for questioning about Sonny. Ric lets Sonny go but doesn’t give in to Kate’s attempts to charm him. Jerry can’t find his blood sample - because Jax has already switched it. Logan attacks Spinelli, then kisses Lulu.

“He assassinated my centaur.” LYLAS, Kate.

Grow up, Elizabeth, Also, liars aren’t allowed to complain when their lies cause problems.

Well, Logan lost his little mind, didn’t he?

If Georgie were my sister, I wouldn’t want to spend time with her either.

June 5th, 2007

Jerry is about to leave town when two Russians come after him looking for money, making him escape through a window. Sonny talks Ric into dropping the charges against Kate, but she’s not that grateful. Maxie encourages Logan to seduce lulu to keep her away from Coop. Logan makes her agree to sleep with him if he succeeds. Emily makes Elizabeth admit that she still cares about Jason.

Yeah, I’m really sure Jerry’s dead. Those Russians really took their time getting to his room, though, didn’t they?

I’m sure LOgan will really fall for Lulu, and then she’ll find out about Maxie’s part in this, and then Logan will have to convince Lulu that he really loves her. I saw 10 Things I Hate About You, people.

Dear Sonny and Kate: just make out already.

Is anyone going to tell Sam that her boyfriend is, you know, going to jail for murder? Just wondering.

June 6th, 2007

The judge gives Scott guardianship of Laura. Spinelli has a plan to help Jason escape from lockup, but Jason isn’t game. Carly and Jax disagree over whose crimes are worse between Jason and Jerry. Robin admits to Patrick that she blames herself for how Jason has turned out. Ric threatens to arrest Spinelli as Jason’s accomplice if Spinelli doesn’t spill everything he knows about Alcazar’s disappearance. Spinelli sics Milo on Logan.

It’s the Jason Show! Not that I’m complaining, of course.

How long have Jax and Carly been married? Yeah, I’d say they’re about due for a divorce.

How nice to see Robin and Patrick talking about something other than living arrangements. They’re still not that interesting, though.

Whatever, there’s no way Georgie would even consider being friends with Lulu. Just because girls are the same age doesn’t mean they’ll be friends.

June 7th, 2007

After Michael and Morgan kill her koi, Kate confronts Sonny yet again. This leads to another Carly/Kate fight, which leads to Kate asking her old friend Jax to help broker a truce between them. Sam returns from a business trip and learns of Jason’s arrest from Ric. Luke plans to try kidnapping Laura again. Logan takes advantage of Lulu’s sadness to get started on his deal with Maxie. Lucky blasts Elizabeth for visiting Jason in lockup but not coming to court. After a desk romp with Amelia, Sonny finds her file of background info on Sam.

Anyone else think Scott is going to end up dead in a gutter?

Shut up, Elizabeth. Man, I hate her.

I think Alexis and Kate should become friends. They have so much in common: hating Carly, being from New York, hating Carly, being friends with Jax, hating Carly, having dated Sonny, hating Carly...

‘Bye, Luke! Send us a postcard from your vacation!

June 8th, 2007

Amelia spills everything about Sam to Sonny, who in turn tells Jason everything. Jason doesn’t agree with Sonny’s worry that Sam is trying to play him, but he wants to talk to Amelia anyway. Luke and Tracy enlist Spinelli to find out where the judge moved Laura, not realizing that Scott plans to kidnap her as well. Carly gets revenge against Kate in the form of a huge, ugly statue. Alexis overhears Ric taunting Jason about Sam sleeping with him, then quickly bonds with Kate. Lucky doesn’t like Spinelli hanging around Jake.

It definitely says a lot about Jason that he doesn’t care about Sam’s past. Also, now that he knows her secret, maybe it’s time for him to spill his to her?

Silly Scott! You’ll never outsmart the Jackal!

Dear writers: thank you a million times for having Kate and Alexis meet and bond. You won’t regret it.

Kate’s statue makes me think, “It’s a big rock. I can’t wait to tell my friends. They don’t have a rock this big.”

Arrested: Jason Morgan, Kate Howard
On the run: Jerry Jacks
Proud new blender owner: Mike Corbin

June 9th, 2007

Next week: Robin and Patrick discuss children, Nikolas surprises Emily (and not in a good way), Sonny continues to delight me by torturing Kate, and Jake probably gets sick and needs a transplant from Jason. Or something.

June 11th, 2007

After Patrick sees Robin holding a baby, the two try to dodge the inevitable conversation about having children. She tries to convince him that she doesn’t want kids, but he’s not appeased. He winds up drinking and complaining with Stan, but they’re joined by Robin, Lainey, and Kelly. Despite Nikolas and Alan’s protestations, Luke and Tracy pull the Laura switcheroo and Luke heads out of town with Laura. Kate hits her head on the statue, so Sonny invites her to spend the night at his house. (No, seriously.) The blender earns its SAG card.

Whatever. Patrick would be an awesome father. And interesting how no one has mentioned whether or not Robin should have biological children when she has HIV. Also, hi, Stan! I was just wondering when he would pop up again.

Between the blender and the statue, the props are taking over the show. (By the way, major props to the camera guy who got the shot of teeny-tiny Kate next to the big, huge statue.)

Nikolas? This is one of those times where you should just sit there and look pretty, mmmkay?

It’s not a good sign that when Coleman and his mountain-man beard appeared on screen, my mom and I both said, “Ewwwwwwwww.”

June 12th, 2007

Amelia tells Jason that Sam knows he’s Jake’s father. Robin and Patrick literally kiss and make up. Bernie, Milo, Max, and Diane all caution Sonny against a relationship with Kate. Scott has Tracy arrested for helping Luke kidnap Laura.

Amelia is a freaking idiot.

So when does Stan get some love? Maybe Kelly and Lainey will show him some...

Awww, I like Alexis/Sam scenes now that they’re getting along.

Hey, where is Dillon anyway? He needs to make things even more awkward.

June 13th, 2007

No one cares about Tracy’s arrest except Lulu, who bails her out of jail. Scott comes after her and threatens her, but Logan takes care of him, of course, and implies that he has history with him. Jason keeps mum about everything Amelia told him. Carly and Jax get silent phone calls and wonder if Jerry is trying to get in touch with them. Robin and Patrick babble a lot about babies and then go to bed. Alexis doesn’t trust Amelia.

Dear Jason: SAY SOMETHING. Freaking idiots, all of you.

Can Alexis get a storyline so she can stop bumming off of other people’s?

I thought Anna was coming today. She at least would have made Robin and Patrick’s scenes more interesting. Of course, the blender could have done that, too.

Maxie realizes that if she sleeps with Logan, eventually Coop will find out, right? Oh, wait, that requires thinking ahead, something she is incapable of doing. Forget I asked.

June 14th, 2007

Jason tells Sonny that he’s Jake’s father. Sonny thinks he should claim Jake, but Jason still doesn’t think it’s safe. Jane refuses to support Jax’s plans to continue to help Jerry. Elizabeth visits Jason, leading Diane to warn him that she could be forced to testify in court and whatever they’ve talked about could be revealed. Nikolas hires someone to bug Jax and Jane’s phones so he’ll know if Jerry contacts them. He also asks Alexis to help clear Emily’s name preemptively. Ric still wants to get a mole in Sonny’s organization. Carly isn’t thrilled to learn that Kate spent the night at Sonny’s. No babies for Sam.

Of course Elizabeth is one of those women who cries to get her husband to stop fighting with her.

Hee, I love how Kate just won’t engage Carly anymore. Now Carly can’t complain that Kate is mean to her because Kate just...won’t talk to her.

What’s up with this Jolene chick? Is she going to be important later on? Or did the actress just win a contest?

Speaking of winning a contest, Substitute Ric was SO ANNOYING. Hurry back, Rick Hearst!

Sonny made “perfectly roasted chicken”? He should be on Top Chef! “Sonny...please pack your knives and go.” “Knives? I’ll show you knives!”

June 15th, 2007

Jake is kidnapped. Jason is denied bail again and worries that Diane won’t be able to successfully defend him in court. Sonny and Jax agree to remain peaceful and have a barbecue together with the boys. Carly and Kate’s peace, however, is not that easy. Lulu tries to keep Spinelli quiet around Elizabeth and Sam.

Um...where’s Anna? I was told there would be Anna.

Sucks to be you, Elizabeth. Still hate her. I’m guessing Amelia is behind the kidnapping, not Sam.

I hope Alexis and Kristina come to the barbecue, and not just because most of the time they’re the only people I actually like. Alexis and Kate can hang out together and Kate can be totally shocked that Alexis and Sonny have a kid together.

Awww, Emily and Nikolas are the new Robin and Patrick - boring, repetitive, and fast-forward-worthy.

Kidnapped: Jake Spencer
On the run: Luke Spencer (and Laura Spencer)

June 16th, 2007

Next week: I pull out my hair because it’s all Jake all the time.

June 18th, 2007

As the kidnapping investigation begins, Mac suspects a postpartum-depression-suffering Elizabeth, Nikolas suspects Jerry, Lulu suspects one of Sonny’s enemies, and Amelia (the most likely culprit) suspects Sam. Carly takes potshots at Kate all throughout the barbecue, and Sonny continues to wield power over Kate. However, she’s the only one who notices that he’s having a hard time accepting that Jax is in Michael and Morgan’s lives now. Nikolas goes off to find Jerry, despite having no leads or proof that he had anything to do with Jake’s disappearance. Spinelli tries to convince Coop to let him tell Jason that Jake is missing.

I know Elizabeth is all traumatized and stuff, but she’s also a little dumb. The six-week-old isn’t going to respond when you call his name honey.

Poor Kristina didn’t get to spend Father’s Day with her dad! And we didn’t get to through Alexis into the already-awkward mix! I’m so disappointed.

I figured Nikolas suspected Sam, not Jerry, but then I remembered that he never sees his cousin anymore. And that everyone on this show is dumb.

I bet Kate came back for cookies. That’s why I would’ve gone back.

June 19th, 2007

Worried that Sam was behind Jake’s kidnapping, Jason asks Sonny to bug her phone and have her tailed. Lucky blames Elizabeth for Jake’s disappearance. Kate admits to Sonny that she sometimes regrets not having a family. Maxie is eager for Logan to get a move on in their deal so he can break Lulu’s heart already.

Wow. Even I wouldn’t have said what Lucky said to Elizabeth, and I hate her!

Can we please have a Carly-free day? I would really appreciate it about now. It would be like summer vacation.

I can’t believe more people don’t suspect Sam of kidnapping Jake. Hello? Can’t have kids? Doesn’t like Elizabeth? Idiots.

I can’t wait for Coop to find out about Maxie and Logan’s deal. Then he can go off and be with someone who deserves him, like...actually, there’s really no one left. Maybe he and Lulu can be together. She wouldn’t cheat on him with his so-called friend.

June 20th, 2007

Spinelli disproves Sam’s alibi, leading Jason to suspect her even more. Sam gets drunk and almost spills to Carly that Jason is Jake’s father. Jason demands that Diane try again to get him out on bail, though she’s not comfortable helping him when he’s obviously keeping something from her. Lucky continues to be a huge jerk to Elizabeth, Emily, and Jason. Edward wants Tracy committed, mostly so he can be the CEO of ELQ again. Jax has something no doubt annoying planned for Carly. More Lulu/Logan/Maxie stuff.

Can we just turn drunk Sam loose on everyone so she can let everyone’s secrets out in the open?

Wow, Lucky is actually making me feel sorry not just for Elizabeth but for Emily. That’s pretty impressive.

Enjoy Ferncliff, Tracy! Or maybe Shadybrook. Or Roselawn. Dang, Port Charles has a lot of psychiatric facilities. And it explains why they had to write in Lainey.

Hi, Dillon! ‘Bye, Dillon!

June 21st, 2007

Sonny and Spinelli tell Diane that Jason is Jake’s father, but she’s sure the judge won’t care. Sonny wants to announce Jake’s paternity, but Lulu vows to stop him. Sam expresses her lack sympathy for Elizabeth, then rushes to the police station to spill everything to Lucky. Tracy is committed and is upset to see that Alan is coming along for the ride. Dillon rushes to her aid and she asks him to blackmail Edward. Having heard about a forthcoming tabloid report about a relationship between her and Sonny, Kate asks him to have an affair with someone with a high profile. Jax has a renovation project for Carly, who thinks he’s trying to distract her so he can go look for Jerry. Ric tries to recruit Logan as his mole.

Yes! Sam! Tell him! TELL HIM NOW! I’m so sick of this storyline.

I’m guessing Kate will suggest Amelia for Sonny’s high-profile affair. Also, there goes my theory that Kate is Logan’s mother.

Yay for original Ric!

Dear writers: all is forgiven for the Alan-haunting storyline. We cool? Don’t send him away in August!

The news about Anna coming this week was obviously wrong. Now I hear she’s coming July 11th. Mateo also returns in July. And Ned comes back next Friday. Yay!

June 22nd, 2007

Jax takes off to meet up with Jerry (and Carly wants to go after him) but winds up on the wrong end of a gun instead. This isn’t the Jake you’re looking for. Jason asks Spinelli to bust him out of jail after all. Kate pushes Sonny’s affair more, then sort of catches Sonny and Amelia together. Sam finds Amelia’s file o’ info.

I totally spaced for most of the episode (planning a spin-off for Mike’s blender and Sonny’s lighter), so...yeah. That boring.

Committed: Tracy Quartermaine
Out of town: Nikolas Cassadine, Jax Jacks

June 23rd, 2007

Next week: Sam and Jason FINALLY get everything out on the table, Carly gets trapped in a boiler room, and Nedly!

June 25th, 2007

Sam remembers killing Bill Monroe, visits her baby’s grave, and tells Jason that she knows he’s Jake’s father. Kate interrupts Sonny and Amelia’s love fest by setting off the fire alarm. Sonny quickly figures out she’s to blame and confronts her. I have no idea what’s going on with Jerry, but Carly possibly saves Jax’s life, or something. Who cares? Lucky and Elizabeth fight about her attachment to Jason. Alexis confronts Amelia about the way she treats Sam, then learns of Sam’s past. Spinelli refuses to break Jason out of jail, worrying that he’ll be spending so much time looking over his shoulder for the cops that he won’t be able to concentrate on looking for Jake.

Thank you, Sam, for actually doing something smart and mature for once.

Once again, an inanimate object gets more screentime than many of the main cast members.

Why would Clarice drop something off for Kate, then sit around her hotel room in the dark? Freak.

Today I’m on Lucky’s side. He deserves better than Elizabeth!

June 26th, 2007

Sam and Jason get everything out on the table, but it’s no remedy for their broken relationship. Sonny calls the hotel staff for help when Kate drops a necklace down a grate, but she’s worried that people will talk about their non-existent relationship. Unfortunately for her, that’s exactly what happens. Jax ditches Carly to go find Jerry. Elizabeth dreams that Jason brings Jake home and declares his love for her. After Maxie comes by to tell Lucky and Elizabeth she’s sorry about the kidnapping, Lulu warns her to stay away from her brother.

Why do I care what happens with Jason and Sam? Oh, right, I don’t.

Dude, if my infant had just been kidnapped, I’m not so sure I’d be up for sex, even with my semi-hunky husband.

Amelia is an idiot. Did she really think this whole thing through?

‘Bye, Jax! Lucky guy gets six weeks away from Carly.

June 27th, 2007

Carly complains to Jason about Jax leaving, even though Jason is a little busy with his own issues. When she returns home, she finds Jerry there waiting for her. Jason finally gets out on bail and immediately gets to work investigating Jake’s kidnapping. Maureen may have taken Jake. Lulu throws her support to Tracy, trying to convince her that Luke loves her. Tracy gets some dirt on Scott, discovering that he has a son. Sam tells Alexis about her past, and Alexis warns that Amelia is out to destroy her. Amelia, however, seems to have different ideas. When Logan finally beds Lulu, Maxie wants to watch.

This is how the holding-room conversation should have gone:
Carly: “Waaaaah! My perfect husband who I treat like dirt left me to go help out his brother! I’m all alone and can’t take care of myself because I’m just a girl! Waaaaah!”

What do you want to bet Jerry lured Jax out of town again so he could come back? Jax isn’t too bright, it seems.

Scott has a son? Gee, who do you think it could be? Surely not the guy who talks just like him, uses the same body language as him, and even looks a little like him!

Dear Maxie: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Also, ew. P.S.: EW!

June 28th, 2007

Jason is called away to deal with Carly’s neuroses (instead of looking for Jake), and the two of them get locked in the hotel’s boiler room together. Of course, Carly sets off a steam valve and Jason has to take his shirt off to fix it. Lulu thinks Logan is Scott’s son and tells him so, even though Spinelli can’t find any connection between them. Tracy tries to use news of Scott’s son to blackmail him into getting her out of the institution, but he doesn’t care if he has a kid. Kate meets Jerry, who tells her that everyone at the Metro Court is afraid of him because he “looks like” Craig. She later overhears Sonny warning Craig to stay away from his family. Kate asks Amelia to go public with her affair with Sonny, but Amelia won’t give in. Robin goes behind Patrick’s back and gets Noah to a do a surgery Patrick won’t do.

Dear baby Jesus: thank you for making Jason take off his shirt. Even though it’s in the middle of a completely ridiculous and contrived storyline. And even though I still can’t get past his stupid hair.

I wonder if the Scott/Logan thing is a fake-out. It would be smart, which is why I’m inclined to think the obvious is true. Wouldn’t it be funny if, say, Spinelli were actually Scott’s son?

I can’t believe I still like Kate! Good call on the character, writers. Sometimes you do something right.

Why do they even give Robin and Patrick scenes anyway?

June 29th, 2007

Sam refuses to let Lucky and Elizabeth come on Everyday Heroes to make an appeal to the kidnapper. Lucky suspects that Amelia may have kidnapped Jake to air a reunion and get high ratings. In reality, Sam saw Maureen kidnap Jake and has kept quiet the whole time. Amelia hears the baby at Maureen’s house again and tells Jason. Scott denies that he has a son, but Logan has known for a while that Scott is his father. Tracy asks Lulu to convince Logan to help her blackmail Scott. Carly goes back to the boiler room to get her purse and Jerry locks them both in there. Kate decides she doesn’t want to live next door to Sonny after all. Robin and Patrick are really boring.

I have to say, I like the twist of Sam seeing Maureen kidnap Jake. Nice one, writers!

Oh, Kate. Just admit you’re under Sonny’s spell and stay put. We all know you’re going to.

Once again...why can’t Robin and Patrick have something interesting to do?

I WAS PROMISED NED. WHERE IS NED? Okay, now they’re saying he’s coming on July 4th. Why do they keep changing things?

Back in town: Jerry Jacks
Left town: Jax Jacks

June 30th, 2007

Next week: Jerry tries to manipulate Carly, Sonny targets Sam, and Jason literally makes Elizabeth’s dream come true.

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