General Hospital blog - June, 2022

June 1st, 2022

The judge declares that she agrees with Michael and Willow that Nina is bad for Wiley, so her request for visitation is denied. Nina desperately pleads to Michael and Willow for mercy, but instead they basically laugh in her face and tell her to enjoy the consequences of her actions. Michael thinks something's up when Carly wants to confirm that Willow doesn't have any regrets about how the way things have turned out. It turns out Carly has already opened the test results, and yep, Nina is Willow's biological daughter. Nikolas starts to put the brakes on before he and Esme can get too far, but she stomps on the gas and they end up having sex. Both claim to not want Spencer to find out, so they agree to keep the affair a secret. Ava and Spencer are both in the house while this is going on, but they have no clue what their respective partners are up to. Spencer asks for his first allowance payment, but Ava refuses to give him anything until he and Esme have actually moved out. Britt gets drunker, complains that there are no eligible bachelors in Port Charles, and makes a public rant about how love is pointless. A parachuter crashes the event and Britt ends up in the pool. Anna and Valentin flirt at the shooting range and engage in a little competition. She wins but he gets the prize, which is the invitation to spend the evening with her. Of course, that's when Victor calls. Chase agrees to help Brook take down Linc after all, as long as they don't do anything illegal. Dante tells Drew that he thinks Michael is going to use ELQ resources to go after Sonny. Drew swears he didn't know anything about that and he hopes Michael doesn't let his anger lead him to make decisions he can't take back. Sam gets Spinelli to admit that he's up to something, but not what it is.

After all these years, this show can still surprise me. I definitely didn't expect Nina to lose.

I feel like the Willow/Nina stuff is going to wander into Sam/Alexis territory, with them finding out about it while Willow's on her deathbed.

"We never have to see that awful woman again." You live in the same town and know all the same people. You'll see her again in, like, five minutes.

Esme is soooooo going to end up pregnant.

Hey, Nikolas: What the %$@#?

They need to give Britt more funny stuff to do. Kelly Thiebaud is great at comedy.

Terry: "Do something!" Brad, pressing record: "I am." Heh.

Was that Josh Kelly as the parachuter? If so, there goes the theory that he was going to play Jason, because there's no way Jason would have that reaction. And there goes the tiny shred of hope I was clinging to that he would be a Nathan recast.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: They missed out on a goldmine by not putting Ava and Valentin together.

I've decided that when Brook and Chase finally get together, it should be in front of a bunch of people who can give them a round of applause.

June 2nd, 2022

Carly considers telling Willow that Nina's her mother, but Willow's so relieved to be done with Nina that Carly can't bring herself to do it. She lies to Drew that the DNA test disproved what Harmony told her, but I'm 95-96 percent sure he doesn't believe her. Sonny talks to Phyllis about the hearing, and it's pretty clear that while he claims he wants what's best for Wiley, he really wants what's best for Nina. He's worried that he hasn't heard from her, and he starts worrying more when they learn that her petition for visitation was denied. Spencer and Ava go looking for Esme and Nikolas, the latter of whom claims he fell asleep reading behind a locked door that isn't usually locked. Esme hides on a parapet while Ava tells Nikolas she doesn't want to give up on their marriage just yet. Spencer panics over not being able to find Esme and the possibility that his plan is going to fall apart. Cameron is tired of being caught in the middle of Spencer's drama, and he announces that if Spencer doesn't do something – anything – to sort everything out tonight, Cameron will take matters into his own hands. Drew asks Michael if Dante's right about him wanting to use ELQ to take down Sonny. Michael doesn't hide his intentions, but he promises not to involve ELQ or risk the futures of anyone in their family. The parachuter is Cody Bell, a childhood friend of Dante's. Britt wants to press charges against him, so Dante goes through the motions to arrest him for reckless endangerment, then takes him to Charlie's instead. Sam's curious about why Dante's never mentioned Cody, and I think it's safe to assume that it's because they got into some kind of trouble when they were younger and vowed to never tell anyone about it. Brook encourages Chase to think less and act more (because that's always worked out so well for her), and he agrees to give it a shot. His first act will be doing anything he can to help Britt get back her music. His second probably would have been to kiss her but Finn just had to text right then. Brad is interested in Cody, but Britt calls dibs, not because she wants to date him but because she wants to sue him (and probably eventually date him).

Carly should tell Michael about Nina and Willow and let him decide the best way to break the news to Willow.

I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if Nina kidnapped Wiley. Calling it right now as a definite possibility.

Nikolas is totally going to play the "we were on a break" card when this all comes out.

Go, Cameron! Thank you for forcing Spencer's hand!

Start making guesses now about what Dante may have done in the past that only Cody knows about.

I'm surprised Britt isn't demanding to speak to the event organizers.

June 3rd, 2022

Nina's headed for the airport when she realizes she lost her half-heart necklaces. She goes back to the cemetery, where Sonny has found them and had Brick discover that she wants to leave Port Charles. He urges her to stay and find another way to see Wiley; she should just think of the visitation ruling as a setback. Nina eventually agrees to stay, though she's not sure she'll be able to handle watching Wiley grow up from afar, being told who knows what about her. Nikolas is only half listening when Ava tells him she can get past their issues. He's not happy that she offered Spencer money to leave or that Spencer chose that money over staying and working things out with Nikolas. Ava offers to change the conditions of the deal so Spencer has to stay. Nikolas tells her that he and Esme seem to be over, so that'll work out perfectly. But Spencer convinces Esme that he wants to work things out yet again, so they're both staying. As Ava assures Spencer that she'll put up with Esme if she has to, Nikolas and Esme agree not to tell them about their affair. Dante and Cody catch up, revealing that Dante was a bit of a troublemaker as a preteen and teen. Cody shows interest in sticking around Port Charles, and Sam offers to help him get a job at the Quartermaines', but Dante clearly doesn't want him in town and Cody knows it. After spending a fun evening together, Trina and Rory have to endure the ritual known as Young Woman's Father Interrogates Her New Love Interest. Taggert is, unsurprisingly, in no-one-is-good-enough-for-my-little-girl mode, but Portia keeps things civil, and she clearly loves the idea of Trina and Rory getting together. Josslyn gets a surprising apology from that classmate who harassed her back in March. He credits the Invader article with making him see what a horrible experience Josslyn and Cameron went through.

Of course Nina wanted to leave town. It's what she always does when she doesn't get her way.

Heh. It's funny when Ava's wrong about something.

The jury's still out on Cody but I'm enjoying Josh Kelly already.

Réal Andrews was perfect today.

All Trina and Portia need to say to make Taggert come around on Rory is, "Would you prefer if he were Spencer?"

Aw, Alexis will be happy to know that her article about Josslyn and Cameron got through to at least one person.

June 6th, 2022

Finn visits Elizabeth at Shadybrook, though she'd previously asked him to stay away. She explains that he always makes her feel like things will be okay, which keeps her from being realistic and doing the work she needs to do. Finn discusses things with Laura and Terry, and they all wonder if this is about something other than grief – maybe Elizabeth is dealing with a repressed memory that's somehow been brought back to her attention recently. If that's the case, it looks like Elizabeth might know exactly what it's about. All Terry and Finn can guess is that it involves her parents. Curtis admits to Portia that he blames himself for Marshall's mugging because his lack of trust sent Marshall away. Portia points out that he's justified in not trusting Marshall since Marshall didn't earn his trust. Marshall's finally ready to tell Curtis everything, even though he's scared he'll damage the family again. He explains that he got really involved in protests after serving in Vietnam, and he became both rundown and paranoid. The day he was arrested, the police took him to a psych ward and he was diagnosed with schizophrenia. Valentin makes another appeal to Ned for an alliance, willing to give up half his power at ELQ if it means he doesn't lose everything to Michael and Drew. Ned isn't down to betray his family or take on a role other than CEO, so he's still resisting, but Valentin remains optimistic. Olivia's like, "Ned, if you're such a good business man, use your business skills to get a good business position with your business colleagues, you business moron." Willow tells Carly that dealing with Nina made her realize that sharing biology with someone doesn't ensure a connection or love. She's decided she doesn't want to search for her biological parents, which thrills Carly. Michael and Drew set out to discuss Ned and ELQ but instead talk about Michael's quest to destroy Sonny, like he's a comic-book villain now. Stella urges Curtis to propose to Portia, like, we're not even sure his divorce from Jordan is final because of you, so go find something else to do, please.

FINN. NO. You've already disrespected Elizabeth's boundaries once. DO NOT call her parents.

Interesting that they have a character with schizophrenia but aren't starting with a mental-health crisis and diagnosis like you'd expect a show to do.

Michael is absolutely right – Ned is throwing a tantrum and they shouldn't give him what he wants. That's the only thing he's right about, though.

So when is Willow going to start dying or whatever?

Wait, Drew DOES believe Carly about the DNA test? Come on, man.

Why did the horse get more screentime than T.J. today?

June 7th, 2022

Marshall tells Curtis more about his decision to leave his family and his fears that his schizophrenia would ruin their lives. Curtis still thinks he should have stayed and let his family help him, but he also seems understanding and sympathetic. He does wonder why Marshall didn't come back sooner, since he's been stable all this time. Marshall says he saw Curtis buying the Savoy as a sign that it was time to reunite with his son. Brad and Obrecht stage a mini-intervention for Britt to discuss her drunken outburst (which has gone viral thanks to Brad's video). She doesn't think she has anything to be confronted over, and they need to stop bugging her about finding a boyfriend. Eventually she confides to Obrecht that she doesn't feel like she'll ever find a guy as good a fit as Jason was, and she doesn't see much point in making her life meaningful because she's just going to die anyway. Obrecht wants her to stop moping over Jason and start feeling grateful that she still has time left, no matter how little she has. Ned proposes that he, Drew, and Michael split leadership of ELQ equally. Michael's hesitant to agree to that, which makes Ned throw another hissy fit and consider accepting Valentin's deal. Brando still wants to fix things between Sonny and Michael, and he offers to work with Dante to arrange some kind of peace summit for them. Sonny advises him to stay as far away from the inevitable mess as he can. It's definitely getting messier, since a recent coffee shipment has been held up at the harbor thanks to a personnel change, and a bunch of Corinthos Coffee vendors have refused to accept deliveries because they're going with a competitor. Sonny suspects that Michael is behind both of these complications. Brando gets suspicious of Dex, who has a gun, and since he shows up at the Quartermaines' to see Michael, I think we should all be suspicious of him. Carly still wants to help Drew and Michael by investing in Aurora, no matter how much Drew protests that she shouldn't. She feels like she owes him, partly because she's keeping the secret about Nina and Willow from him and partly because she basically ditched him when Jason came back. Drew assures her that he never felt like he was ditched, and he knows they would have rekindled their friendship at some point. He admits to feeling like an outsider with the Quartermaines sometimes, though it's better than feeling fully Quartermaine, which might involve acting like Edward. Carly says Drew is more like Lila and promises to help him stay on that path.

Great work from Robert Gossett today.

I don't think Curtis gets the realities of what it would have been like to have a mental illness in the '70s. "But there were hospitals where you could have gotten help" – yes, the compassionate and comfortable psychiatric wards the U.S. was famous for 50 years ago.

Why do Brad and Obrecht think one drunken meltdown is going to ruin Britt's reputation? The woman stole a baby! She did jail time – and it WASN'T for stealing the baby! Not to mention that Obrect's one to talk about Britt making the family look bad. The fact that she's never killed anyone or given anyone unnecessary ECT puts her way ahead of both of her parents and one of her brothers.

If Ned wants to run a company so badly, he should just start his own. He should go back into the music business, start his own label, and get Brook's music back from Linc.

June 8th, 2022

Dante and Brando chase Dex off the Quartermaines' property before he can do anything to Michael. Brando takes him to Sonny, who warns that if Dex does anything to hurt any of his kids, Sonny will kill him. Dex says he was just trying to handle a problem proactively, and he thinks Sonny would prefer a worker like that to a robot who just blindly follows orders. Sonny's like, "No, I want someone who just blindly follows orders." Selina has concerns about how Michael's actions are affecting Sonny's business, but Sonny assures her that he's handling everything. He's not, because Dex is actually working for Michael, who hired him to help take Sonny down from the inside. Not only has Britt's pool flop gone viral but the hospital board would like to discuss it with her. She takes out her anger on Brad (totally justified) and Cody (less justified but definitely a Britt thing to do). Brad thinks something's up with Britt and urges her to fill him in. She's about to when Cody distracts her and she just ends up yelling at him some more. Gladys is keeping a close eye on Sasha so she doesn't have a chance to even think about relapsing. Sasha promises she's not going to, but a surprise delivery she ordered for Liam months ago and a big task for Deception make her shaky and could easily lead her to backslide. Brook is curious about why Gladys thinks Sasha needs a babysitter. Dante asks Michael if destroying Sonny's business is going to be worth it or make him any better than the man he's trying to take down. Michael doesn't care for Dante's opinion since he's clearly on Sonny's side, so that's another relationship Michael wants to distance himself from. Brad tells Selina that he's enjoying working for her and is ready for more responsibility so he can make a bigger contribution to the family business. She says he needs to observe and learn more, then undergo training. She also implies that a family member disappointed her in the past and paid for it.

A mole! I didn't see that coming.

If Brando thought Dex was going to hurt Michael, why didn't he tell Michael or Sonny?

Ugh, of course Michael is a guy who says "circle back."

Again, why isn't Britt going after the person who hired Cody?

Does everyone in this town mispronounce "gif"?

You're telling me Gladys hasn't searched Sasha's stuff?

Time to jettison Brando, Sasha, and Gladys. I can't imagine anyone cares about them enough to be upset if they left.

June 9th, 2022

Cody encourages Britt to sue the Metro Court and Society Setups for not ensuring her safety (and also because they're rich corporations and deserve to lose some money). He offers to testify on her behalf to make sure she wins. She thinks he's pressing this so he can get some of the money, so she pushes him in the pool. They get a visit from Zelda, Society Setups' matchmaker, who chastises Cody for not being more careful and makes a deal with Britt to give her six months of free service in exchange for dropping any complaints against Society Setups. In the end, Cody's out some money because of his error, but Britt's content and Spinelli's happy – because, as everyone in the audience has probably guessed already, he's behind all this. Ava tells Spencer and Esme that in order to keep receiving an allowance from Spencer's trust fund, they'll both have to be on their best behavior. They object, but Spencer eventually gives in so they can keep the peace. They all agree that they want to live together in harmony. Nikolas makes it clear to Esme that what happened between them meant nothing to him and will never happen again. She tells him that if he decides to come clean to Ava, she'll support him. Spencer asks Ava to release him from his restitution obligation so his proximity to Trina won't cause more problems for him and Esme. Plus, he doubts Trina wants to be around him, especially now that she's spending time with Rory. Ava easily figures out that he's jealous because he has feelings for Trina. Sam and Carly are concerned about Spinelli, since he's been dressing differently and seems to be hiding something. They get even more worried when they spot him fighting with someone at the Metro Court. He tells them he's been seeing a therapist, but there was a mix-up with payment and he had to deal with an angry bill collector. Sam and Carly don't buy this, so they decide to take him out and get him to open up to them. Josslyn suggests that she and Trina study abroad during sophomore year, but Trina can't think that far ahead, since she could be expelled and/or in prison by the end of the summer. Josslyn turns their focus to Esme, still wanting to find a way to break up her and Spencer. Trina objects, since alienating Esme from the Cassadines, like Josslyn wants, might lead her to leave town and evade punishment for everything she's done. Josslyn confides that she's worried that whatever Cameron's keeping from her will affect Trina's trial. Sasha and Gladys tag-team a lie to keep Brando from finding out about Sasha's relapse. He suggests pushing back their wedding reception, but Sasha promises she can handle any stress it brings her way.

Me about five minutes in: "Can't Britt just push Cody in the pool and call it even?" Me about half an hour in: "Ah. Okay, I guess not."

Only Esme and Spencer would have a problem with the simple instruction to behave themselves.

Bradford Anderson deserves a lot better than what they're giving him here.

If Carly and Sam want to take Spinelli hatchet-throwing, fine, I won't object, but they really just need to get him drunk if they want him to talk.

June 10th, 2022

Curtis tells Portia about Marshall's diagnosis and calls him brave for both leaving the family and coming back. He realizes schizophrenia can be genetic and considers undergoing genetic testing to see if he's at risk for developing it. Portia quietly panics, then calls a genetic counselor as soon as she's alone, so I'd say that's a pretty good indication that Curtis is Trina's biological father. The PCU Title IX investigation finds Trina guilty, so she'll most likely receive sanctions, if not expulsion. She sees it as kind of a blessing in disguise since now she's freed up to dig up something on Esme. Josslyn and Rory both offer to help but Trina doesn't want them dragged into a situation that could get them in trouble. She decides her best bet is to find out what Esme was really up to the night the recording was taken. Esme is delighted to tell Ryan that she slept with Nikolas, so their plan is going in exactly the right direction. Ryan is proud until he learns that she hasn't told Ava about it. Finn confides to Gregory that he feels unable to help Elizabeth, and he's thinking about contacting her parents. Gregory is a lot kinder than I would be when he tells him not to. Spencer tells Cameron that he's figured things out with his plan and will need to quit his job to spend more time on it. Laura just talked Cameron into going on a camping trip with Finn, Gregory, Violet, Jake, and Aiden, so Cameron tells Spencer he has to work one last shift at Kelly's first. Nikolas wants to make things up to Ava by divorcing her (I assume so they can get remarried). Spencer denies that he has feelings for Trina but Ava is smart enough to know better. She wonders whose side he's really on. Epiphany reconnects with Marshall, who's thrilled that she's going to try to go to med school, and also definitely wants to date her. Mac and Felicia finally communicate and agree that they don't want any more children.

So are we doing a big summer plot or what?

"There's a fine line between helping and interfering." Thank you, Curtis. Please talk to Finn.

Brook Kerr did great with the oh-crap-don't-let-him-see-you-freaking-out stuff.

"Miss Muffet"? You can do better, Ava.

So Ryan's a vampire? Makes sense.

Finn: "I'm thinking about--." Me: "No."

June 13th, 2022

-Felicia approaches Ryan, who it turns out never told Esme about their history. Felicia warns her not to let him turn her into his latest obsession, adding that once he's gotten whatever he wants out of her, she could end up dead. Esme isn't happy about that but she's still committed to her and Ryan's plan. She's going to keep quiet about her fling with Nikolas for now, and she's going to keep in mind that that might not be all it takes to drive him and Ava apart, but she's confident that she can blow up the family for good. Laura's pleased that Spencer wants to fix his relationship with Nikolas (and says he would have done it even without Ava's caveat that he stay at Wyndemere) but doesn't think it'll happen as long as Esme's around. Spencer somehow has an epiphany that Esme's past is the way to bring her down. Thanks to Carly, who bought shares of Aurora despite Michael telling her not to, the company is doing great and the merge is shaping up to be a huge success. Still, Michael's worried that if things go wrong, Carly will lose a bunch of money. He and Drew try to sway things in their favor by getting Lucy on their side, and though she's very interested in what supporting them will do for her, she doesn't make a firm commitment. Martin and Valentin already think Lucy's going to vote Valentin's way, and that Martin can convince her to if he thinks she isn't. Valentin won't consider any kind of plan B, though he knows that losing ELQ leaves him with little else. Nikolas talks Ava into getting a divorce so they can go into a new marriage with the right intentions and a new outlook. Sonny bugs Jordan about a shipment of his that the harbor master won't release, though she can't do anything about it. He confides that he's having trouble with Michael, and she reminds him that she and T.J. used to have a rocky relationship, but since they fixed it, Sonny shouldn't give up on Michael.

Yo, Esme, you gotta do your own research. How could you NOT know about Ryan's past with Felicia?

I'm going to guess that even if Esme doesn't get pregnant, she'll fake a pregnancy.

Kiki mention – drink!

"The key to Esme is her past." Yeah, that's why you gave Sam info to help her look into Esme's past. Wake up, Spencer.

I can't believe Michael's surprised that Carly bought shares behind his back.

If Nikolas thinks that Ava might be so tempted by getting half his assets that she would walk away from their marriage, they...really shouldn't do this.

Why is Sonny acting like he's never been frozen out by one of his kids before (including Michael)? He SHOT DANTE and look at their relationship now.

June 14th, 2022

Dante and Sam run into Cody as he's trying unsuccessfully to get the $500 Zelda shorted him on his paycheck. He tells them he's saving up to start a ranch, though he's said before that he doesn't like to stay in one place for too long. He decides to approach Zelda one last time before leaving town, and he catches her going into a hotel room to see Spinelli. Josslyn and Trina meet with Spinelli, hoping he can help them tie Esme to the video. The only helpful info he can give them is that the phone the video was recorded on seems to have been stolen. He mentions a bar where someone could get a stolen phone, then regrets accidentally pointing them in a direction they shouldn't go. They tell him they won't follow up, then immediately head to the bar. Everyone on the Chase/Webber family camping trip is having a good time except Cameron, who feels like they're just sweeping their problems under the rug and pretending everything's okay. He feels even worse when he learns the results of Trina's Title IX investigation. Finn isn't sure how to reach out to him so he asks Gregory to do it. Since Gregory's a professor and knows stuff about Title IX, this works out surprisingly well, since Cameron gets some questions answered but also realizes that Finn cares about him. Maxie fills in as a P.C. Pioneers chaperone on a camping trip, which allows her to spend some time with Austin. They're definitely more comfortable with each other now, and the atmosphere is fun and casual, but it looks like someone's watching them. Britt and Nina...whatever, and then Britt gets the good news that Cody's leaving town. Sonny and Carly rehash the same stuff they've been fighting about for months, but now Carly's also mad that Sonny's Team Nina instead of Team Michael. As usual, Sonny then goes to Nina for comfort.

Josslyn: "I'm my mother's daughter, Spinelli." Spinelli: "Precisely what I'm worried about." I mean, right?

An outdoorsman like Austin can't pitch a tent without instructions?

This camping stuff is boring. Someone get eaten by a bear or something.

Enough with Wyatt, please.

Why did Carly want to talk to Sonny in the first place?

June 15th, 2022

Josslyn and Trina are able to meet the guy who sold Esme the burner phone and confirm that he sold it to her. Unfortunately, another patron at the bar recognizes them from media coverage and outs Trina as the daughter of a former cop. Long story short, a big bar fight breaks out and the cops get called. Brook spots Linc talking to Selina and summons Chase to help her spy on him. Chase wants to put that whole thing on hold for one evening, but he accidentally gives Brook the chance to snoop in Linc's things when he confronts Linc for being...well, Linc. She finds a card from the Savoy with a password written on the back, since Selina invited Linc to a poker game. Chase tries to convince Brook not to follow up, but it's Brook, so of course she does. Cody eavesdrops as Spinelli and Zelda talk about hiding what they've been up to. He blackmails Spinelli for hush money and somehow gets a seat at Selina's poker game. Maxie and Austin think there's someone or something lurking in the woods, but when they run into Gregory and Violet, they figure it was just them. Later, Austin slips away to talk to an unseen person who was watching them, telling the person never to approach him when he's not alone. Sonny tells Nina that he's ready to pursue something with her, but he makes the mistake of mentioning that he made the decision after fighting with Carly, and it kind of sounds like he's only going after Nina because Carly is no longer an option. T.J. tries to talk to Curtis about Marshall, but all Curtis can focus on is getting rid of him before he finds out about Curtis' dealings with Selina. Sam wants more information on Dante and Cody's friendship, so Dante tells her how Cody was nicer than expected when he realized city-kid Dante was a little afraid of horses during his first experience in the great outdoors. Cameron catches on that Finn is trying to help him and his brothers however he can, and he appreciates that someone's looking out for them.

When did Josslyn and Trina get fake IDs?? Their parents would be furious.

I'm not saying anyone should strive to be the reason a bar fight breaks out, but it would definitely give you a good story to tell.

They didn't even try to make the bar look different from the Floating Rib.

Chase leaving Brook messages because he doesn't know where she is just makes me think he shouldn't be a detective. She found a card for the Savoy! Where do you think she is?

I didn't realize yesterday that Maxie customized her P.C. Pioneers shirt with glitter. Perfect.

June 17th, 2022

Sonny and Nina finally address the fact that Scott trashed Michael in court. Sonny's not happy about it, of course, but he believes that Nina had nothing to do with it and that she didn't know what really happened to Claudia. Nina does her thing, whining about how she feels like no one understands her except Sonny. Surprisingly, though, she doesn't want to rush into a relationship, and he agrees to take things as slowly as she wants. Linc flirts with Britt, who couldn't be less interested in someone like him. Brook ignores Chase's attempts to get her to behave herself and approaches Linc. She ruins his chance to sell one of her songs, and in response he makes gross comments and gets himself punched by Chase. So just days before he's supposed to get off suspension, Chase gets arrested for another assault. Brad lets Cody into the poker game, where he proceeds to clear out all his opponents in eight hands. Selina's not happy with that, since she'll have to extend credit to the other players to keep the game coming, and she punishes Cody by having a minion beat him up. Britt finds him behind the Savoy and takes pity on him. Josslyn and Trina luck out when Rory is one of the officers responding to the bar fight and he offers to let them off with a warning instead of arresting them for trying to use fake IDs. They're back to square one on getting incriminating evidence against Esme, though. Carly tells Drew that now that she's seen how different Sonny is, based on how he went to Nina instead of Michael after Scott went after Michael in court, she feels like she's really free of him. Drew wants to celebrate and tries to convince her to go skinny-dipping with him in the Metro Court pool. They settle for ice cream instead, but I feel like this isn't the last time one of them will try to get the other naked. Valentin takes Anna to a drive-in for their first date, but when the conversation turns to Jennifer Smith and her mysterious French Naval officer, Anna suspects that this was just a way for Valentin to try to get information out of her.

It's gross how okay Sonny "Every Single Thing I Do Every Minute of Every Day Is for My Kids" Corinthos is with Nina being willing to drag Michael down to make herself look better.

I'm surprised that when Selina's goon was beating up Cody, Brad didn't yell, "Not his face!"

Time for Josslyn and Trina to team up with someone who's over 21. I suggest Kristina.

I'm sorry but Drew is too good for Carly. They don't seem like a good match to me.

Valentin is the dictionary definition of trying too hard.

June 20th, 2022

Laura tells Martin that she thinks Victor was behind both their safehouse attack and Luke's death. She's working on having him deported, which will hopefully keep him from influencing Nikolas and Spencer, and put a halt to Operation Demeter. Alexis calls to tell her that she's learned of something catastrophic coming her way that most likely can't be stopped. Esme is enrolling in PCU and wants to study psychology, but she needs to do a study of a patient and she's, of course, chosen Ryan. She asks Kevin for assistance, but he doubles down on the importance of her not getting anywhere near Ryan. Esme asks if Ryan has ever had a healthy relationship with anyone, and if not, if that's a hereditary thing. Mac isn't happy to learn that Felicia confronted Ryan, even though he's supposedly harmless now. Felicia mentions Esme to Kevin, who realizes she lied about keeping her distance from Ryan and reacts by getting her fired from her internship at Spring Ridge. Trina tells Portia, Taggert, and Curtis about her and Josslyn's adventures, and though they're not happy about the risks they took, they're kind of proud. Curtis even secretly tells Trina that he would have done the exact same thing. Trina's worried that the guy who sold the phone to Esme will be hard to track down, but Taggert and Curtis assure her that he can't hide from them. Spencer tells Victor about the current living arrangements at Wyndemere and his desire to keep Esme close. He reveals that he wants to find Esme's birth parents, allegedly in hopes of helping her get through her abandonment issues. Victor agrees to help track them down. Anna and Valentin are definitely developing something, what with their makeout session and their agreement to go on a second date.

Laura: "There's probably lots of people who want you dead." Martin: "You're just saying that to make me feel better." Heh. Who gets offended because they WEREN'T the target of a murder plot?

"Dr. Collins, what is wrong with me?" Sorry, Esme, we don't have time for that. The show's only an hour long.

Trina, you don't have to tell your parents everything.

Why did Spencer ask Victor to help find Esme's parents when he could just ask Sam? Actually, that might work out well. Maybe Sam will turn up something while Victor pretends he couldn't find them.

Okay, I'll admit that Anna offering Valentin popcorn and him saying, "No thanks, I'm driving" was funny.

"You have another woman stashed somewhere?" Not since he lost track of Claudette. Hi-yo!

June 22nd, 2022

The thing Alexis warned Laura about was an op-ed trying to rally support for her to be recalled. A group of Laura's supporters band together to find out who's involved in the group behind it, the Friends of Port Charles. Laura suspects Victor (not his style) and is frustrated when Bobbie's name turns up on a petition supporting the recall (she thought she was signing one to save the whales). Sonny and Curtis trace the money to Selina, who tells them who wrote the letter: Cyrus, who's recently been moved to Pentonville. When Laura visits, he frames his criticisms of her as calling her out for her sins. She questions how he was thinking about God when he went after her so viciously. Then she shocks him by saying she forgives him. After spending the day with various Port Charles citizens and seeing how they support each other, Laura writes a response to the op-ed talking about how wonderful the community is and how she's okay being recalled if her job is taken over by someone who loves the town as much as she does. Scott proposes to Obrecht, who says no since things are already so great between them. Maxie wonders if Elizabeth might get better faster if she were around her kids.

No one said "15,000" in honor of the 15,000th episode! I feel cheated.

No Martin? No Cameron, Jake, or Aiden? Violet, who doesn't even know Laura, was the only kid?

The Cyrus reveal might have been a surprise if Jeff Kober hadn't been in the cast photo released when this episode was taped.

If a rise in crime was a good reason to recall a mayor in Port Charles, they would have a never-ending string of recall elections.

Imagine having a grudge against someone for 40+ years because of freaking Scott.

Valentin in a baseball cap is a weird look.

Oh, good, another summer hearing about softball games we don't get to see.

What a ridiculous way to shoehorn Maxie into the episode.

How did Carly go from calling the Quartermaines snakes to apparently playing on their softball team all in one episode?

June 24th, 2022

The ELQ shareholders gather, each side sure that they'll win the fight over either ousting or keeping Valentin on as CEO. Lucy tells Ned that cutting Valentin might not actually be the best idea – he's made the company stronger, and he's united the family, even though it's against him. If he's gone, they'll just turn on each other again. Ned shocks his family by voting with Valentin, which ties the vote and leaves the decision to Lucy. She chooses to keep Valentin, which means the merger won't be happening. Brook decides to embellish the threat Linc posed to her at the Savoy to make it look like Chase punched him to save her, Chase won't let her lie, and he's ready to take responsibility for his actions, even if they lead to him losing his job. While he meets with Jordan, who tells him his fate rests in the hands of a civilian review board, Brook tells Linc she'll partner with him again if he drops his charges against Chase. She doesn't realize that Jordan has already talked him into doing that. Linc turns Brook down anyway, since he's determined to get Chase fired. Dante tells Cody all about Britt, her parents, her past crimes, and that whole thing where she stole Dante and Lulu's kid. Cody's thrown for a loop but just seems more intrigued by Britt than ever. He tells Dante that he's not supposed to leave town right now, because of his injuries, but that doesn't seem to be the truth. Carly's optimistic about how the ELQ vote will go and thinks the merger with Aurora will turn out great. She reveals to Olivia that she got the money for her Aurora investment by selling her half of the hotel to some venture company. She'll have 30 days to buy it back, and she doesn't see any reason to believe that won't happen. Britt forgives Brad for the whole taking-video-of-her-that-went-viral thing, partly because she wants him to help her figure out what happened to Cody. Brad tells her about half of what happened, leaving out the part where Selina had him roughed up. He asks Britt again about the secret she's been keeping, and though at first she seems willing to talk, she later decides to keep it to herself. Willow is definitely either pregnant or dying.

Does Ned truly believe that Valentin will follow through on his offer? Because I don't.

"I know that face. That is your plotting face." Nah, that's just her normal face.

"Don't they make an ointment to get rid of you?" Rock on, BLQ.

"Don't interrupt me – I'm in the middle of the curse." Please give Olivia more screentime.

Place your bets now on who will end up owning Carly's half of the hotel. I say Nina.

June 27th, 2022

Valentin, Ned, and Lucy all vote against the ELQ/Aurora merger, and Drew decides to try to salvage at least a little family unity by siding with them. Valentin makes Ned the chairman of the board and heads out to plan a celebration. Michael and Drew tear into Ned for bugging them about keeping the family business going, then turning on them because he couldn't take a lesser role for the good of the company. Ned accuses Michael of being more interested in the merger than in ELQ for selfish reasons. Drew predicts that sooner or later, Valentin will betray Ned, and when it inevitably happens, Ned shouldn't expect Drew or Michael to come to his rescue. As Drew goes to break the news to Carly that the merger isn't happening, Michael calls Dex, ready to step up whatever he's planning for Sonny. Nina and Sasha butt heads with Olivia when they try to hang out at the Metro Court pool, since that's Carly's territory. The battle doesn't really go anywhere, though. Nina and Sasha talk about Sonny, because of course, and things get tense again when both he and Willow show up. The woman are really worried about Willow, who's definitely sick, and she ends up passing out. Chase tells Brook that he's been suspended indefinitely and has to face a civilian review board. She's desperate to help him save his job, and she's still willing to work with Linc to make it happen, even if it means writing more songs that only he will profit from. Chase tells her that while he loves his job, there's something more important than it, and though he doesn't say, it's safe to assume he means her. Brook seems poised to do something reckless, but instead, she calls Gregory and Violet to come hang out with Chase. Carly gathers Josslyn and Bobbie to celebrate her impending windfall from the ELQ/Aurora merger and Michael's business successes. Bobbie's the only one who seems realistic and doesn't want her to count her chickens before they've hatched. Sonny wants Brando and Dex to make peace, and Dex plays along perfectly, pretending that Brando kept him from making a huge mistake by going after Michael.

A great twist would be that Ned did all this to get Valentin to trust him so he could keep an eye on him and eventually bring him down from the inside. That at least would have redeemed Ned.

Sasha's an idiot for asking Nina to meet her at the pool and Nina's an idiot for not suggesting a different location. Team Olivia.

Great makeup on Katey MacMullen today. She looked horrible.

Me: "Brook, don't do anything stupid." Brook: (calls Gregory and Violet to cheer up Chase) Me: "Thank you, Brook."

June 29th, 2022

Obrecht takes charge of Willow's care, and Sasha and Sonny take her to the hospital. Michael almost completely ignores Sonny, of course, but he does listen when Sasha tells him that Sonny took good care of Willow. (He also takes pretty good care of Sasha, trying to keep her from fearing the worst since she only associates the hospital with horrible things.) T.J. and Epiphany run tests as Willow downplays the fact that she's fainted twice in the past few months and had additional spells where she felt dizzy or weak. Just as the audience is placing bets on what life-threatening illness she has, T.J. steers the plot in another direction and tells her she's pregnant. Carly admits to Drew that she bought her Aurora shares with money she got from selling her half of the hotel. Her financial manager breaks the news to her that the venture company she sold to doesn't have to wait the full 30 days to let her buy back her half if she can't prove that she can afford it. Right now, she can't, so unless someone comes through with a loan or a really generous gift, she's out a lot of money. Olivia's upset with Ned for his ELQ stunt not just because he made a stupid move but because he didn't say anything to her about it beforehand. He says it was all for his family, by which he means her, Leo, and Brook – he doesn't need the other Quartermaines. Olivia points out that Leo could suffer the consequences if Ned distances himself from the others. Victor tries to butt into Anna and Felicia's conversation when he hears them talking about Victor. Neither has any interest in talking to him, and they're a little disturbed that Valentin feels differently, even though he says he's keeping Victor close to keep an eye on him. Anna thinks he's up to something beyond just maintaining his hold on ELQ. Nina questions Obrecht's decision to turn down Scott's proposal, though Obrecht makes a good point when she says he did it on a whim because he'd done something to upset her. Nina guesses that if he asked again under better circumstances, Obrecht might give him a different answer. She's happy to be in a relationship that's much less complicated than the ones she had with Faison and Victor. Speaking of Victor, he heard about how she declined the proposal and thinks it's because she's not over him. He tells her that they're meant to be together.

Sorry, but Willow dying would be a more interesting story than Willow being pregnant. Wait, maybe she's pregnant AND dying.

They missed a great opportunity to have Willow hit her head and fall in the pool, then have Sonny or Nina save her.

I'm almost impressed that the show found a way to make the ELQ/Aurora mess about Carly.

Anna considers Victor the only complication Valentin brings with him to a relationship? Really?

Please tell me they put Victor and Valentin in nearly identical outfits on purpose.

Oh, the Quartermaines need a new stable manager? I wonder where they'll find someone in Port Charles who has experience doing that sort of thing and is just itching for a reason to stay in town and also knows two people connected to the Quartermaines by marriage, one of whom has already mentioned the possibility of him working there.

I love how supportive everyone is of Epiphany going to med school.

June 30th, 2022

Michael and Willow are stunned by news of her pregnancy but once it sinks in, they're both thrilled. Sasha is shaken, though, and when Felty asks for her help getting him credentials so he can cover her appearance on a home-shopping network, she asks for something in return. Trina's trial date has been set, and Curtis is eager to get things moving on proving that Esme framed her. T.J. and Marshall want in, too, and the latter calls an old connection who can get them access to a guy who sells phones on the black market. Spencer approaches Brad to ask him to help find Esme's birth parents. Britt objects and wants the two to stay far apart. Spencer genuinely apologizes for what he said to her when she ID'd the pill for him, and she agrees to help him if he's able to provide DNA samples that could connect Esme to her parents. Esme asks Rory to help her find a way to get around Kevin's ban against her having contact with Ryan. He says he can't do anything but might know someone who can. It's really just an excuse to get access to her phone, but she won't hand it over. Trina catches them together and Rory lets her know that Esme seems to get that he knows something. Trina warns him not to let down his guard around her. In fact, she wants him to stay out of it altogether, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen. Spinelli runs into Sam and Dante while they're with Cody, who lies that they know each other because they've chatted about technical stuff so Cody can improve his landing the next time he parachutes. Sam's suspicious but can't get anything out of Spinelli. Cody can, though, since he's close to getting Spinelli to make some sort of investment, which I think is just a fancy way of blackmailing him again. Cody also decides to stay in town longer, apparently because of Britt. Gladys thinks Brando should up his social status now that his wife is rich. Related: Shut up, Gladys.

I need at least one scene where Willow mentions the fact that her first baby died of SIDS and she's worried about the same thing happening to this one. Just one mention, that's all.

I don't have a problem with the Ashford men teaming up but I want Trina to have an active role in taking Esme down.

T.J. seems to have forgotten that he's in a relationship with one of Trina's prosectors, and getting involved in her defense might cause some trouble there.

Britt, I don't think you can kick Spencer out of a hotel you don't own or work in.

Oh, Rory. Not so smooth.

It's so weird hearing someone call Spinelli by his first name.

Sasha, you were so close to being rid of Gladys! Call her bluff next time.

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