General Hospital blog - March, 2006

March 1st, 2006

Tony is memorialized. Robert prepares to leave town, since Robin won’t ask him to stay. Manny overhears Elizabeth and Alcazar discussing his switching Lulu and Skye’s charts. Dillon and Georgie refuse to get an annulment after Tracy threatens to destroy their marriage. Skye passes out.

Yay for flashbacks! Amber Tamblyn is going to get a paycheck for that one little scene.

Ooh, Manny is a smart man. An evil man, but a smart man.

So how is Tracy planning to break up Dillon and Georgie? Nothing she’s tried in the past has worked. Plus, if Georgie is about to turn 18, there won’t be much she can do anyway.

Is that it for Robert? That sucks.

March 2nd, 2006

A drunk Nikolas blasts everyone at Courtney’s funeral for being hypocrites. Skye is pregnant but isn’t sure she’ll be able to carry the baby to term. Sam learns that she and Danny weren’t biological siblings.

So when Courtney gets pregnant after being told she can’t have children, it’s a miracle. When Skye gets pregnant after being told she can’t have children, it’s...not?

Wow, Coleman really shouldn’t have been at the funeral. He made Courtney strip! Why didn’t Nikolas say anything to him?

Speaking of Nikolas, apparently he stopped off to get a haircut and a shave before he went to the funeral. And he cleaned up nice. I wish Helena had shown up at Wyndemere at the end, though.

I wish I could jump in the TV and tell Alexis and Sam that they’re mother and daughter so we don’t have to sit through the rest of this. Get to the good stuff already!

March 3rd, 2006

Alexis begins searching for her daughter, who confronts her at Danny’s grave. Maxie tries to keep Nikolas from self-destructing. Patrick asks Robin to convince Noah to agree to the transplant. Michael and Morgan are steps away from catching Sonny and Emily in an intimate moment.

Out rumor: They’re killing Edward. In rumor: John Ingle is coming back. That would rock.

STOP HITTING US OVER THE HEAD WITH THE FACT THAT SAM IS ALEXIS’ DAUGHTER. WE GET IT. If you want to make it interesting, make Alexis have to ask Helena for information.

Ew! Not only will Michael and Morgan be scarred for life, but so will I.

Patrick - if you want Robin to do you favors, you’ll have to be nicer to her the rest of the time.

March 6th, 2006

Alexis hits a dead end when she can’t find her daughter’s birth records. Sonny wants Emily to come to the island with him. Nikolas wants to scatter Courtney’s ashes in the ocean, but Jax wants to bury her.

If, like me, you were wondering why Diego is still in the credits, it’s because he’s getting out of jail (already?) on Friday.

Everything is boring right now. Who knew a maternity “mystery” could be so dull?

March 7th, 2006

The man who runs the clinic where Alexis gave birth won’t give her any information, but Ric manages to get the name of the law firm that handled the adoption. Nikolas gets his way. Emily catches Sonny yelling at Janine but doesn’t seem to care. Sonny orders Max to keep quiet about his vacation with Emily. Skye decides to find out if she can carry her baby to term.

Emily makes me so mad, I don’t even have the words. She’s so Rory. Which makes Sonny Jess and Logan all rolled into one. I guess that means Nikolas is Dean, Monica is Lorelai (which is awesome), Elizabeth is Lane (except that means Lucky is Zach, which isn’t awesome), and Alan is Christopher (heh). I wonder who Kirk would be.

Since when can Ric hack into computers?

Skye and Alcazar will have an adorable baby (assuming she doesn’t fall victim to this show’s rule about only 50 percent of pregnant women not miscarrying). I’m guessing that in 16 years or so, their child (who will probably be a girl) will hook up with John and Sonny will be furious that his nephew is dating an Alcazar.

I hope Max gets paid a lot for the crap he has to put up with. He needs a girlfriend so badly.

March 8th, 2006

After Ric calls on an old friend for help, Alexis finally finds out who her daughter is. Sam wants to wait to marry Jason. Jax gets paranoid when Robin tries to convince him that Carly will double-cross him. After Patrick encourages her to go after what she wants, Robin kisses him and takes him to dinner. Michael doesn’t like that Carly is going to dinner with Jax. Georgie wants to set up Guy and Lucas. Guy runs into Frank.

What? They’re going to make us wait to find out who Alexis’ daughter is? I can’t wait! I need to know now! Seriously, is there anyone who doesn’t know? Because if there is, I feel sorry for that person.

Dear Michael, you are ten. Act like it.

Guy! Wow, he hasn’t been around for a while. I’m not even sure that it’s the same actor. Makes sense that they would bring him back for Lucas, though.

Max, Leticia, Alice, Stan, and Reginald (who?) should have a weekly poker game where they sit around and complain about their bosses. They deserve it.

Can we please stop calling John “Little John”? This isn’t Robin Hood.

March 9th, 2006

Believing her daughter is dead, Alexis tells Ric about having to give her up. Sam and Jason are just steps away from learning that Alexis is her mother. Jason tells Max to keep an eye on Carly, who tries to rile up him and Robin by kissing Jax. Sick of distractions, Patrick makes Robin leave the Metro Court, then kisses her. Guy convinces Lucas to turn Frank in to the police. Emily and Sonny...I don’t care.

John Ingle is coming back! Whee!

Everyone stand still. It’ll make it easier for Nancy Lee Grahn and Rick Hearst to act circles around you.

Derk Cheetwood appears to be trying to get on the next season of Dancing with the Stars.

Funny how when I yell, “Just kiss already,” Patrick listens.

Sonny is so predictable, I’m sure that next he’ll buy Emily a dress and take her gambling.

March 10th, 2006

Sam and Jason break into an office at Alexis’ high school and find her photo in a yearbook. Alexis dreams that Kristina thinks she’s going to give her up. Lucas and Guy get Frank thrown in jail. Tracy throws Georgie and Dillon out. Sonny and Emily have trouble in paradise. Diego gets out of jail.

People who need therapy: Sonny (always and forever), Alexis, Ric (over the whole mother situation my foot), Lucas (a little), and soon, Sam

Raise your hand if you think Diego is going to break up Dillon and Georgie’s marriage. I refuse to welcome him back. I’d rather pretend he was never around in the first place.

I must admit, I ran up everything with Emily and Sonny today and still understood everything that happened.

What was the whole thing about Lucky working more so Elizabeth can spend more time with Cameron? More importantly, will that actually come back?

March 13th, 2006

After getting confirmation that Alexis is her mother, Sam and Jason come face-to-face with her, Ric, and Kristina on the docks. Nikolas tells Alexis that giving up her daughter was the right choice. Tracy wants Dillon and Georgie to stay so she doesn’t have to deal with Lulu. Just after Diego arrives at the mansion and everyone goes ballistic, Alcazar announces Skye’s pregnancy. Emily and Sonny are boring. Diego is totally in love with Georgie.

The look on Luke’s face after hearing about Skye’s pregnancy was priceless. What was that about the non-joys of parenthood?

Once again, even after running up all of Emily and Sonny’s scenes, I know exactly what’s going on. And I still don’t care.

Ha, everyone is exactly as happy to see Diego as I am.

Guess what, Sam? You’re a Cassadine! (Pssst, Helena. Go after her!)

March 14th, 2006

Sam doesn’t like the fact that Kristina and Molly get to have a happy family. Max and Milo try to figure out what to tell Jason about Carly’s activities. Georgie, Dillon, and Diego all wind up living above Kelly’s. After a nurse discovers that John’s blood type doesn’t match Jax’s or Courtney’s, Jax forbids Nikolas from seeing John. Manny learns that Diego snitched on one of his men to get out of prison. Skye tells Luke that she doesn’t love him and is happy with Alcazar.

I love Jason’s response to Carly accusing him of having spies. “Look at this, Mr. Spy.” Why doesn’t Jason get to do funny stuff more often?

I also love that Milo’s reaction to needing to figure out how to keep Carly from doing something stupid was, “We’re going to need more men.”

So what exactly is Jax’s reasoning for not letting Nikolas see John? Whatever Jax tells him, Nikolas probably won’t believe it anyway.

Diego is so going to break up Georgie and Dillon. Go away, Mini Alcazar.

March 15th, 2006

Disturbed after seeing Manny with Kristina, Ric asks Jason to kill him. Jason won’t, since Sonny wants Manny alive to prove a link between him and Alcazar, so Ric tells Sam she’s Kristina’s best hope. Carly tries to seduce Sonny’s location out of Max. Dillon is less than pleased to see Georgie and Diego together. Emily and Sonny head home.

More bizarro Port Charles - Ted King had emergency throat surgery, so TPTB did a quickie temporary recast for March 23rd, 24th, and 27th. And who did they get to replace him? Jay Pickett, aka Frank from Port Charles. I like him a lot, but...okay, enough with the Port Charles refugees playing different characters on GH. They’re supposed to take place in the same city!

Oh, also? Skye falls down a flight of stairs. The writers are smoking something, aren’t they?

Ha ha ha ha ha! I totally forgot that Sonny slept with both Sam and Alexis. That’s beautiful. (Of course, he would find a way to make the situation about himself.)

I heart Max.

March 16th, 2006

Sam tells Ric that if he wants Manny dead, he should kill him himself. Georgie asks Lucky and Jesse to investigate an attack on Diego, which Alcazar thinks Manny is connected to. Sam believes Alexis doesn’t think she’ll make a good lawyer. Max doesn’t enjoy keeping secrets for Sonny. Carly and Jax decide to see where their relationship is going. Emily and Sonny want to keep their relationship from Jason.

Why does Jason think Sonny should know about Sam and Alexis? Because he slept with both of them. (Hee hee hee, it’s still funny.)

You know, I think a Jax/Carly pairing would be pretty interesting. It’s a little unexpected and it could be fun to have them sneaking around while Sonny and Emily are sneaking around.

Hmmm...maybe Sam should be a lawyer.

Dear Georgie: don’t make promises you can’t keep.

March 17th, 2006

Sonny is appalled to learn that Alexis is Sam’s mother. Nikolas catches Jax and Carly together and blasts them for not honoring Courtney’s memory. Max risks bodily harm in order to keep Jason from finding Emily and Sonny together, but Jason winds up finding Emily in a seductive moment. Bobbie lectures Noah about finding a different way to protect Patrick.Robin believes that Patrick has bet someone $100 that he’ll take her to bed. Alexis is shocked to hear that Sonny’s will names Carly as Kristina’s guardian if anything happens to him.

Would someone PLEASE smack Sonny across the face? “Oh, I don’t want anyone to know that Alexis and Sam are mother and daughter because it would look bad for me.” Well, boo hoo! Sam has the right to do whatever she wants with this. SHUT UP, SONNY. Also, I don’t think he can name Carly Kristina’s guardian in his will without Alexis’s permission. He doesn’t have primary custody anyway, so Alexis probably has first say.

I’m so glad Alexis told Sam off. She so needed to hear that Alexis isn’t to blame for everything that’s ever happened to her. You shut up, too, Sam. And why is Nikolas asking her for advice. I mean other than the fact that now we know they’re first cousins and they had to have a scene together.

Um, Max? Couldn’t you just have said Jason’s name and given Sonny and Emily time to get their hands off of each other. Also, I think Emily and Jason are both going to be scarred for life now.

Can I move in with Robin? I like her apartment.

March 20th, 2006

Jason catches on to Sonny and Emily and isn’t happy about it. Sonny doesn’t want Sam to tell Alexis that she’s her daughter. After their disastrous non-date, Robin catches Patrick and Carly dancing at Jake’s. Luke wants to reopen the Haunted Star, but Lulu thinks he just wants to reconnect with Skye. Nikolas can’t get Alexis to convince Jax to drop the restraining order keeping him from visiting John. Jax wants to make Carly John’s legal guardian.

I LOVE that Luke has another nude portrait of Helena. When he started pulling it out, I hoped that was what it was.

Um, Sonny and Emily? You do remember that Jason knows when people are lying, right?

Yeah, Sonny. Go ahead and pretend that you’re looking out for Kristina’s best interests. We all believe you.

Robin - confront! Confront!

March 21st, 2006

Robin can’t decide whether or not Patrick and Carly slept together. Sonny tells Jason that he broke things off with Emily. Carly opts for Jax over Patrick. Lulu is unable to Parent Trap Luke and Skye back together.

Sonny goes to confession and all he says is that he uses women? I wonder if Father Coates sits in a corner and rocks back and forth when he sees Sonny coming.

Also, if you’re going to lie to your best friend about your relationship with his sister, at least try to sound convincing.

I hate it when Alexis and Ric have the filler scenes.

I’m not sure why I’m supposed to care that Noah has disappeared. Either kill him or not. Don’t make me put forth any effort.

March 22nd, 2006

Georgie throws out Diego’s letters but Lulu finds them. Luke asks Dillon to befriend Lulu so she’ll leave him alone. Manny sends someone to run Diego down. Carly tries to keep Jason from discovering that Sonny and Emily are together. Justus tries to protect Lainey from a racist Frank.

Richard Fancy is back! I love him so much that I’ll forgive the whole “amazingly, Benny had an identical twin brother named Bernie who also happens to be an accountant” thing.

Shut up, Carly.

And Georgie hid a bag of trash from Maxie...why?

I don’t think Luke has ever talked about his kids the way he did with Dillon. That was a nice scene.

March 23rd, 2006

Everyone is going to the reopening of the Haunted Star. Lulu tells Georgie that if she doesn’t tell Dillon about her correspondence with Diego, she will. Carly asks Sam to get Jason to back off of Emily and Sonny. Robin won’t go to the party with Patrick, so he asks Kelly to go instead.

I don’t know if you’ve heard, but apparently there’s something going on on the Haunted Star. Or something? Seriously, it’s like right before the hotel fire, when everyone mentioned the auction 10 million times to let us know that something important was going to happen there.

My eyes! MY EYES! Sam, put on a sweater or something! Though it’s a testament to Steve Burton’s love for his wife that he didn’t take a peek.

For the amount of screentime/mentions Epiphany and Bernie are getting respectively, I’m guessing they’re going to be more important than they currently are.

Why does Skye keep calling Frank Lorenzo? See, it’s confusing when they bring Port Charles characters over here and call them by different names.

March 24th, 2006

Alexis wonders why Sam is acting strangely around her. Robin finds Noah in rehab and makes him and Patrick reunite. Carly and Jax seduce each other with poker, then go to bed. Jason spots Emily and Sonny together.

Oh, no! Alexis killed Sam’s baby and brother, then spilled her drink on her! What an evil witch!

At least Skye only fell down three stairs. She got off luckier than most pregnant women on this show.

Noah will have to hold on for another week until Jesse gets shot by a clown. (You think I’m joking? Sadly, I’m not.)

I’m glad Jason finally saw Emily and Sonny together because now they’ll have to shut up about not dating.

March 27th, 2006

Upset over being lied to by Sonny and Emily, Jason attacks Ric, thinking he’s hurting Sam. Tracy threatens to take the Haunted Star from Luke, since he used her money to refurbish it, so Nikolas purposely loses thousands of dollars so he can keep it. Patrick offers Noah a sedative that will kill him, but Noah refuses it. Carly and Jax do whatever. Emily starts to worry about what will happen when Jason finds out about her and Sonny. Skye and Alcazar are happy and stuff.

Yay, a Luke/Alexis (Natasha) scene! We need a lot more of those.

I want a Jason/Sonny showdown! Mostly because I think Jason will win.

Awww, Nikolas is sweet. Of course, now he can ask Luke for a favor pretty much any time he wants one.

Hee, Alcatraz. Luke really does have a nickname for everyone.

March 28th, 2006

Carly discovers that Alexis is Sam’s mother. Jax declines to let Alexis and Ric rent space in the hotel, since Carly doesn’t want him to. Alcazar requests a truce with Jason and Sonny. Nikolas agrees to invest in the Haunted Star so Luke can pay his taxes. Elizabeth asks Jason to do whatever he needs to to keep Lucky safe. Diego agrees to file a report against the hit-and-run driver. Skye and Alcazar attempt to assemble a crib.

“I can’t believe you would choose sex over friendship. Now I wish I’d slept with you.” Ladies and gentlemen, Alexis Davis.

If Alcazar were really smart, and if the writers would ever let this happen, he would try to team up with Jason and Sonny and got three against one on Manny.

I guess the folder shown in the first act has to go off in the third.

Why is Kristina so obsessed with Sam being her sister? She barely even knows her. Is she psychic or something? That might be cool.

March 29th, 2006

Jesse is shot at the carnival. Sonny won’t let Jason go after Manny because he doesn’t want to start a mob war. Ric tells Sam to stay away from Alexis. Georgie comes clean with Dillon. Carly has fun with her new information about Sam and Alexis. Emily tells Elizabeth that she’s still with Sonny. Patrick puts Noah on the donor list against his wishes.

‘Bye, Jesse! No one cares.

I never used to think clowns were that creepy...until today.

Maybe Ric should back off if he doesn’t want to get beaten up again.

I’m guessing there will be a moment tomorrow where Elizabeth hears that a cop was shot and thinks it’s Lucky. And then she’ll realize he’s okay and they’ll be all happy and it’ll be nice and they’ll actually have something to do. For two minutes, at least.

March 30th, 2006

Robin tells Patrick he shouldn’t operate on Jesse because he might be a donor match for Noah. Sonny and Jason become the main suspects in Jesse’s shooting. Carly thinks that Sam should keep quiet about Alexis. Sonny is worried that Alcazar will go after Emily. Carly and Jax debate nature vs. nurture.

Hey, Manny, could you kill Jesse, too, and make this whole thing go a little faster?

So much for Lucky and Elizabeth getting something to do.

Maybe Carly will accidentally guilt Jax into telling her the truth about John’s paternity. Because when she finds out, she’s going to be ticked.

Whenever Sonny and Emily talk, all I hear is, “Blah, blah, blah.”

March 31st, 2006

Jesse kicks the bucket and Lucky suspects that Patrick killed him so Noah can have his liver. Alcazar beats Manny to the punch by telling Skye that he switched her chart with Lulu’s. Jason suspects that Sonny is about to hurt Emily but winds up shooting someone to save them. Nikolas steals a moment alone with John.

Wait, so...who was that guy outside Emily and Sonny’s room? And why is Nikolas there in the preview? Why is this show so confusing?

Oh, I wish that I had Jesse’s liver... (oh, come on, you were thinking it, too)

Does anyone else run up all of the scenes with John, or is it just me?

Go, Alcazar! If someone is threatening to tell someone you love something you don’t want that person to know, always tell the person anyway and take the power away.

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