General Hospital blog - March, 2007
March 1st, 2007
Jason feels really guilty. Alan’s death makes Sam and Alexis want to bond. Tracy pressures Carly to tell Lulu to be careful in her investigations. Edward asks Sam to convince Jason to return to the family. Sonny asks Stan to look for a way for him to take over Alcazar’s territory. Lucky and Elizabeth make plans to move into the Spencers’ old house.
Mind your knitting, Tracy and Carly. Like anyone’s going to try to kill Lulu, especially with Luke, Lucky, and Nikolas around.
Elizabeth is not worthy of living in the Spencers’ house! Be gone, woman!
Can Jason please be allowed out of the coffee shop?
Hi, Kiko Ellsworth! I thought you weren’t coming till tomorrow. Awesome!
March 2nd, 2007
Just before his test results come in, Patrick gets Robin to talk about her feelings over the shooting and Alan’s death. After an unhelpful conversation with Scott, Lulu and Dillon intercept a letter from Alan to Luke that claims to contain the truth about Rick’s death. Sonny and Jax argue about Carly, of course. Sam heads to New York, most likely to run into Watch Guy. Maxie tries to get Coop a job at the Metro Court but almost outs him in the process.
The Jax/Sonny smackdown I was anticipating was less than satisfactory.
Once again, thanks for the Robin/Patrick stuff, writers!
Why did Alan write a letter to Luke to be opened in the event of his death? If he knew Laura didn’t kill Rick, why didn’t he come forward earlier? Why do the writers think we’re going to swallow this crap?
Watch Guy is a little creepy, and I’d like to know his name so I can stop calling him Watch Guy.
Oh, Maxie. One question to answer and you couldn’t even get it right.
Scorecard
March 3rd, 2007
Next week: Luke and Tracy want Alan’s money, Jason gives in to Elizabeth (boo!), Carly can’t make up her mind, and Alan haunts Tracy. Thanks, writers.
March 5th, 2007
According to Alan, Scott killed Rick. Jason agrees to give up the baby. Patrick is HIV negative, but Robin worries that he’ll no longer want to be with her. Sonny and Carly fight, Sonny and Jax fight, and Carly plans to go to the Dominican Republic. Jax gives Coop a job, but Max is suspicious. Luke blasts Lulu for talking to Scott.
GROW A BACKBONE, JASON! And stop being selfish, Carly! (Oh, wait. That’s like telling fish not to swim.)
Whenever Jax and Sonny have a scene together, all I can think of is to quote Kate from Lost: “Shall I get a ruler?”
For an unpredictable girl, Maxie is quite predictable.
Best moments of the episode: 1) The look on Maxie’s face when Robin started babbling about men. 2) Lulu’s not ignoring Luke, she’s listening to music! Hee.
March 6th, 2007
Alan is memorialized. Jason remembers Alan telling him he loved him. Tracy and Edward try to kick Skye and Alcazar out. Lulu learns that Alan thought Scott killed Rick.
Yay, flashbacks! And Monica/Jason scenes! And lots of Nedly!
March 7th, 2007
Carly and Jason head to the Dominican Republic, though Carly is paranoid that something will stop them from getting her divorce. Tracy doesn’t like Alan’s will (which leaves pretty much everything to Emily and Jason’s future children), so she and Luke conspire to forge a new one. Edward nominates Monica to become the new chief of staff, but Ford wants the job. Dillon and Spinelli are jealous of each other and Milo. Coop’s old military friend Logan (Drake!) shows up looking for a job.
I know they’re playing the Tracy/Luke will thing up for laughs, but it’s pretty disrespectful. Nice of the writers to mine comedy from the killing off of a beloved character.
So if you count Logan, Lulu now has FOUR LOVE INTERESTS. And Alexis is single. Huh?
Jason needs a day off from everyone else’s problems. He needs a No Carly Day.
“He left everything to Emily” is quickly becoming the new “this is my house”/“I gave it to you.” Also, Alan didn’t leave anything to Lila or Michael? That sucks.
March 8th, 2007
Everyone knows Tracy forged Alan’s will, but no one does anything about it. Later, Tracy has a vision of Alan taunting her. Carly learns that she needs Sonny’s consent for divorce. After telling Sonny about Alan’s accusations of Scott, Lulu confronts Scott in person. Watch Guy gets a TV host to ask Sam personal questions and bug her with his watch. Stan shuts Spinelli out of Sonny and Jason’s computer network. Logan annoys Lulu.
I always wondered how people could get divorced in the Dominican Republic without a spouse’s consent. Whatever.
Raise your hand if you care about Watch Guy! Yeah, I thought so.
Thanks for Alan’s ghost, writers. As if I weren’t already mad enough about that storyline.
Shut up, Logan. You’ve only been around two days and I already want you to go away forever.
March 9th, 2007
Ric gets custody of Molly. Alan’s ghost (sigh) claims he can’t rest until Tracy admits she forged his will. Lulu is frustrated that she’s not making leeway until Spinelli discovers proof that Scott was at the Scorpios’ the night of Rick’s death. Sam, Watch Guy, whatever. Robin, Patrick, whatever.
Yeah, shocker that things didn’t go Alexis’ way. Why should the cuckolded woman going through chemo have any good days? The writers suck.
I hate when they have a new character and don’t show his face. Unless it’s a returning character, we don’t care. It’s not like Malcolm McDowell on Heroes!
Day three: still hate Logan.
Tell me again why you came back, Scott?
Scorecard
March 10th, 2007
Next week: Sonny and Carly are still married, Spinelli has a secret about someone, Maxie helps blackmail Scott, and Nikolas is kidnapped (and not by Helena!).
March 12th, 2007
Carly is all, “I choose me.” Nikolas encourages Alexis to take Molly and Kristina and leave the country, but Alexis thinks she should stay and fight Ric. Logan stalks Lulu and learns that Scott killed Rick. Luke overhears Scott trying to get a guardian for Laura and attacks him. Hurt by Lulu’s dismissal of him, Spinelli goes to Jason for advice. Sam probably killed someone, but ask me if I care. (I don’t.)
Dear writers, please stop giving Kristina scenes that make me sad.
Jason needs a Spinelli-to-English dictionary.
I give Carly’s newfound sense of self-reliance or whatever she’s going to spin it as one week. Also, Jax? Shut up. Jason is closer to Carly than you will ever be.
Day four: still hate Logan. Stalker!
March 13th, 2007
Sonny buys up a bunch of marble so Carly will have to do business with him. (No. Really.) Carly entertains herself by flirting with Coop in front of Jax and Maxie. Lulu wants to erase all the evidence that implicates Scott. Maxie and Logan scheme to blackmail Scott. Sonny tells Skye that Alcazar will soon no longer being doing business in Port Charles. Alcazar appears to be faking his condition. Alexis hates the new living arrangements. Bobbie makes Scott drop the charges against Luke.
Granite? Really? This is low, even for Sonny.
Hmmm...I probably should have suspected earlier that Alcazar was faking. Nice misdirection!
The twins playing Molly had a REALLY bad day today.
Day five: still hate Logan, but interestingly, Coop is growing on me. If Carly really tries to hook up with him, I will forgive a lot of things going on right now, because that would be hilarious. Can you imagine a Carly/Coop/Maxie triangle? Hee!
March 14th, 2007
While trying to dig up something on Jason to show up Stan, Spinelli discovers that Jason is the father of Elizabeth’s baby. Lulu is less than pleased. Carly refuses to give in to Sonny until she decides that she needs to make Jax jealous, or something. I wasn’t really paying attention. Luke would like to know why Logan is hanging around Lulu. Watch Guy’s accomplice tries to dig up more dirt on Sam.
Ooh, nice dirt, Spinelli. That ought to make things a lot more interesting...
Carly, you’re an insult to women everywhere. Thanks a bunch.
Day five: shut up, Logan. Also, seriously - how is Maxie not in love with him instead of Coop? Logan’s exactly her type!
Dear Daytime Emmy people: look, I like Genie Francis and all, but how does she deserve an Emmy for 30 days of screentime over Nancy Lee Grahn, who has had the best plots ever over the past few months? That makes no sense. P.S.: kudos on the Julie Marie Berman nomination, though.
March 15th, 2007
Lulu goes to Carly for advice (which just gets Carly riled up about Jason and Elizabeth), then confronts Jason. Craig ambushes and injects Nikolas. Maxie gets Coop to distract Lulu so she can get the Scott/blackmail info from Spinelli’s computer. Little does she know she’s about to find out that Jason is the baby’s father. Carly and Jax fight boringly and then he kisses her. Robin and Patrick are both cute and boring.
CRAIG! Craig is back! Is it my birthday?
How bad is it that I can guess Lulu’s thought process and predict when she’ll go to Carly for advice?
Day six: Logan is so boring, I can’t even be bothered to dislike him.
Like brother, like brother, because dang, Patrick, you’re hot, but you put me to sleep.
March 16th, 2007
Elizabeth shows up before Lulu can tell Lucky he’s the baby’s father (and before Lucky can tell Lulu that Luke and Laura weren’t always shiny and happy). Craig offers Nikolas the antidote to the poison he gave him if Nikolas gets him a new identity. Sonny takes Carly to Jake’s, where Jax shows up with Amelia and finds them dancing. Georgie interrupts Maxie, Coop, and Logan’s attempt to get info, but they send Scott a blackmail text message anyway. Ric suspects Alcazar is faking.
Things Craig’s return almost makes up for: this interminable baby plot, the neverending Carly/Sonny/Jax triangle, Logan, and the fact that Ted King is leaving in May. (Maybe Craig can be the new resident villain?) Only thing that could make it better: Faith comes back and she and Craig have evil babies together.
Can we stop talking about Luke and Laura’s past, please? Considering one of them isn’t even on the show anymore?
Did I sleep through the part where Georgie is Maxie’s mom? Seriously, Georgie, shut up.
Amelia, go away. You serve no purpose and you both bore and annoy me. As Lucy would say, ta!
March 19th, 2007
Carly calls Jason to bail her out of her date. She then heads to Jax’s place, where she catches him bringing Amelia in for a drink. Craig tells Nikolas they’ll be partners and he’ll help Craig pretend he’s his own twin so he can stay in Port Charles. Sonny wants to get a mole inside the PCPD and Ric wants to get one inside Sonny’s organization. Scott confronts Lulu, thinking she’s his blackmailer. Logan interrupts and tells Maxie and Coop that they need to leave Lulu out of their plan. Jason thinks Lulu has told Sam about the baby. Sam used to be married to a guy named Bill Monroe, it looks like.
Dear Craig, please stay in town. I love you. Marry me. Also, feel free to kill Emily if the mood strikes you.
Looks like the writers saw The Departed.
Carly? GROW A FREAKING BACKBONE!
Awwww, Logan wuvs Lulu.
March 20th, 2007
Carly sleeps with Jax so he won’t be able to be jealous of Sonny for sleeping with her anymore. Nikolas tries to get rid of Emily, Lucky, and Elizabeth so Craig won’t hurt them. Monica and Edward threaten to take Tracy to court over the will. Lulu agrees to keep quiet about the baby’s paternity. Alexis appreciates Sonny’s friendship.
So Jason is lying to Sam, and Sam is lying to Jason. A nice, healthy relationship there.
Carly, by sleeping with Jax, all you’re doing is adding fuel to my theory that you’re going to wind up pregnant.
Hey, Alexis, if you and Sonny get back together (well...together, since a one-night stand wasn’t exactly “together” before), you may want to invest in birth control. Lots of birth control.
Awww, poor Nikolas. And poor Emily, strangely enough.
March 21st, 2007
Jason tells Carly to stop being a drama queen. Sam asks Spinelli to do…something about Angela Monroe. I don’t think she actually told him what to do. Scott confesses to Laura that he killed Rick. Lulu can’t decide whether or not to tell Lucky about the baby before the wedding. Alcazar is still totally faking it. Bobbie warns Luke that Scott wants to tell Lulu about the rape. Amelia asks Jason to let Sam do her own show.
I think Ric calling Jason “Blue Eyes” was supposed to remind us that he, you know, has blue eyes, and the baby will probably have them, too, but it sounded more like he was hitting on him.
Well, the writers suck because they’ve perfectly set things up for Laura to come back, and yet according to Genie Francis, no one has said anything to her. Instead, we have to suffer through the one-sided scenes with the wig and revisiting the whole rape thing.
I care so little about Elizabeth that if she falls down the stairs while walking down the “aisle,” I don’t think I’ll even care.
Sam? Pick up the phone, call the police, and tell them to arrest Amelia for harassment. Seriously, that women cannot take a hint.
March 22nd, 2007
Lulu still can’t decide whether or not to stop the wedding. Craig warns Nikolas not to push her family and friends away and make them suspicious. Patrick convinces Robin to move back in with him, but she changes her mind after learning that he got Georgie to help convince her that they won’t have any privacy at Mac’s. Alexis meets Craig.
Go, Lulu, go! I would totally spill everything, then check Lucky into rehab and not let him leave. Elizabeth needs to be called out for all of her crap, and she needs to be forced to admit what she did. I’m so sick of her, I want her comeuppance NOW.
Also, it’s an unspoken soap law that if a close friend or relative of the bride is not in attendance, the wedding will not happen. I think there was only one exception, and I can’t even remember what it was. When Emily got called away, I predicted that the wedding won’t be happening.
Okay, how awesome would an Alexis/Craig pairing be? Honestly!
It would make more sense for Maxie to show up at the house during the wedding if she, you know, had something to say there.
Robin and Patrick are still boring and having the same conversation 18 times, but hee to the Georgie thing. A for effort, Patrick.
March 23rd, 2007
Spinelli disrupts the wedding but Lulu stops him from spilling anything. Spinelli doesn’t care, since Lulu calls him her boyfriend and makes his year. Max figures out that Coop is Three and sends him straight to Sonny, who debates killing him but will probably send him into the PCPD as his mole instead. Robin shows up at Wyndemere looking for Nikolas and encounters Craig instead. Carly catches Jax and Alexis having a close moment. Robin tells Patrick that she doesn’t want to live with him, and he guesses that she doesn’t want to see him until he can agree with her.
I know where they’re going with Robin finding out about Craig, and I love it (not least because it means she gets a plot).
Dang, I thought Max asking if Coop had a sister was him wondering if he was related to Brenda. Why doesn’t anyone notice that they have the same last name?
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again - if Ned won’t come back, I can completely support an Alexis/Jax repairing.
Patrick, please hang out at Kelly’s until Logan shows up. I’m sick of him and want him to have a scene that makes sense.
So...why did the writers have Emily leave before the wedding? I don’t get it.
Scorecard
March 24th, 2007
Next week: Jax uses Alexis to make Carly jealous, Alcazar wants to kill Jason and Sonny, and Craig makes Nikolas and Robin fake a relationship. AWESOME.
March 26th, 2007
Mike tells Sonny to work things out with Carly. Carly helps this along by going to see Sonny and making out with him. Craig tells Robin to move in with Nikolas so she can keep him from getting sick. Nikolas responds by attempting to overpower Craig. Sonny threatens to kill Coop if he doesn’t become the Matt Damon to his Jack Nicholson. Alexis plays along with Jax, then encourages him to make up with Carly. Maxie is less than thrilled to catch Coop and Lulu talking.
I can’t believe Craig just let Robin leave Wyndemere like that. I know she can’t do much because he’ll just let Nikolas die, but still, her uncle is the police commissioner! She could go fill him in!
Seriously. Jax and Alexis. Together. Make it happen.
Wow, Maxie mentioned Jesse for, like, the first time in a year. They really were close, weren’t they?
Ew, Lucky. Take it from a little sister - Lulu does NOT want to hear about your sex life.
March 27th, 2007
Nikolas’ plan to hold onto the counteragent backfires, so he and Robin are forced to do what Craig wants. Patrick is so suspicious that he goes to Mac for help. Jason tells a disappointed Sonny that Carly slept with Jax. Lulu’s three boyfriends want to know more about Logan. Maxie doesn’t want Coop to be a cop, but Ric is happy that he’s joining the force. Sam accepts Amelia’s job offer.
I think we need a drinking game where you drink every time Carly and Sonny make out. Today would be a sober day, but ordinarily you’d wind up on the floor 15 minutes into the episode.
Congratulations, Sam. You found the worst way possible to shut Amelia up. Now can you move to New York and be gone forever?
I’d call Dillon, Spinelli, and Milo the Three Stooges, but I honestly don’t know which would be which.
Wouldn’t it be hilarious if Ric tried to get Coop to be the Leonardo DiCaprio to his...Mark Wahlberg? Martin Sheen? (If it’s Sheen, Ric should be careful.)
The Lulu/Maxie catfight was awesome, and Maxie totally deserved it, which made it even better.
March 28th, 2007
Robin takes a sample of Nikolas’ blood to try to determine what Craig gave him. Lulu agrees to go on a trial date with each of her boyfriends, starting with Dillon. Maxie tells Coop she’ll steal the police entrance exam for him. Sam gets a makeover (like she needs one). Patrick goes to confront Nikolas. NO MORE JASON/ELIZABETH SCENES.
In a fight between Patrick and Nikolas, I would bet on Patrick. Nikolas is a gentleman and didn’t learn how to fight dirty. In a duel, however...
Mike has been on more in the past week than in the past three months. I’m not complaining, but what’s up with that?
Dear Maxie, do you have ANY morals?
So Sam killed a guy (other than Diego) in self-defense? Thanks, Amelia! Now leave.
March 29th, 2007
Patrick tells Alexis he’s letting Robin go, then moves on to Kelly. Later, Alexis catches Robin and Nikolas making out. Skye asks Jason to honor Alan by keeping Sonny away from her so she can run Alcazar’s business in peace. Carly learns that nothing happened between Jax and Alexis, and he boasts that he made her jealous. Jason gives Spinelli romance advice. Rodriguez turns down Ric’s proposal that he be the Leonardo DiCaprio to Ric’s Mark Wahlberg.
Are Nikolas and Robin just practicing? Or did she finally give in to his hotness?
Skye, don’t ever try to snow Jason. It won’t work.
I’m choosing to believe that Patrick just wasn’t paying attention when Logan walked by him, and not that they’re not brothers. I must keep supporting my own theory!
I can’t decide what I’m more sick of - Jason/Elizabeth scenes or any combination of Sonny/Carly/Jax scenes. I’ll call it a tie.
March 30th, 2007
Alcazar plots Sonny and Jason’s deaths as they plan to move their operation to the Cellar. Alexis passes out with only Kristina and Craig nearby to help her. Lulu is confused when Scott accuses her of blackmailing him. Jax plans a romantic evening with Carly.
Eeee, a Faith reference! Maybe they’ll decide she’s not dead after all. And also, the Cellar? Why?
Seriously, Spinelli, why would you follow a mobster down a dark alley into a basement?
HANDS OFF KRISTINA, CRAIG. Not kidding.
Wouldn’t it be funny if Maxie and Logan texted Scott while he’s talking to Lulu? I mean, they’re dumb enough.
March 31st, 2007
Next week: Craig charms Alexis, Jax and Carly reunite, Lulu starts making up her mind, and Michael makes me want to smack him.
Back in town: Ned Ashton, Jax Jacks
Dead: Alan Quartermaine
Out of town: Sam McCall
(Re)engaged: Lucky Spencer and Elizabeth Webber
New in town: Logan (Drake!)
Still married: Sonny and Carly Corinthos
Broke up, I guess: Robin Scorpio and Patrick Drake
Remarried: Elizabeth and Lucky Spencer