General Hospital blog - May, 2011

May 2nd, 2011

There's no trace of Lucian, but Dante is sure Suzanne knows more than she's letting on. Jason learns that Zacchara's out of prison and quickly figures out that he must have had something to do with Brandon's murder. He breaks into the penthouse to get information and is busted by a blonde (probably Abby). Michael and Abby are nowhere near breaking up. Lisa bugs Patrick and Robin's house. Sam admits that she kind of wants to postpone the surgery, but not really.

Wow, Vanessa Marcil Long-Married-Name talks FAST.

Don't worry, Brenda, you're going to get a newer, nicer-looking model.

The look on Jason's face when he realized Zacchara was in the penthouse killed me: "YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME. MY LIFE COULD NOT GET ANY WORSE RIGHT NOW."

Putting aside the question of how Lisa got her hands on surveillance equipment, why would she bug the house? I'm guessing she's going to hear lots of nursery rhymes and sweet talk between Patrick and Robin.

May 3rd, 2011

Brenda continues freaking out, mad at herself for not expecting something bad to happen to Lucian. Sonny thinks that this marks the end of his marriage. Zacchara definitely hired someone to pose as Abby and get caught killing Brandon. Dante confirms that Lucian's disappearance has nothing to do with Sonny's enemies, but he can't pin it on Suzanne just yet. Too bad, since she's about to fly off somewhere with the kid. Abby asks Jason not to kill Johnny, explaining that she just stopped by to ask some questions. Jason asks Abby if she's working for the Zaccharas. Shawn gets in the middle of Carly and Jax's custody battle. Michael thinks Jason wants him away from the mob so badly because it'll make him feel better about having a child. Lisa needs a new hobby.

I'm about 85 percent sure Sonny doesn't give a crap about Lucian. He hasn't even called Jason and gotten him on the job.

So the police didn't put out any sort of notice alerting people to what Lucian looks like? So that, you know, no one can take him out of the country? Because Suzanne's not even trying here. She's just...going to get on a plane. Dante, you suck.

Hey, Shawn gets some back story!'s boring.

Pretty much the only benefit of the listening devices is that Lisa will know when Kristina's at the house. Other than that, I just don't get it.

May 4th, 2011

Luke asks Alexis to help him sue Tracy for money and ownership of the casino. He also tries to reach out to Lulu, who reluctantly sticks to her guns. Elizabeth goes back to work but starts envisioning Jake. Nikolas tries to get Siobhan's visa extended while Siobhan and Lucky go off and have sex somewhere. The visa doesn't come through, so Siobhan either has to marry Lucky or go back to Ireland. Diane wants access to Spinelli's secret files so she can write another crappy book, and for some reason she thinks Dante can help her. Olivia and Steven's long, slow path to a relationship finally lands them in bed.

Don't these people have jobs? They're all off having sex with each other talking to lawyers and stuff. Elizabeth's the only person who's actually done something productive.

I wonder if Alexis will realize that she could have everyone at that intervention arrested for kidnapping. Probably not.

Seriously, the book sucked. I wish they would stop talking about it.

I love Steven and Olivia so much, I'm willing to call them by their Internet nickname: Stevia.

May 5th, 2011

Nikolas suggests that Lucky and Siobhan take a trip around the world to get away from Lucky's problems and avoid the visa situation at the same time. They decide to get married instead. Elizabeth finds out and rushes off to meet them. Luke wants to make Tracy hate him so she'll pay him to go away. Ethan admits to Lulu that he doesn't want to say Luke has a problem because he admires his father's lifestyle. Molly reacts to Sam and Jason's possibly baby-making in typical Molly fashion.

Elizabeth, if you're going to run all the way over there to talk to Lucky, you better actually tell him something.

Congratulations, show: You made me stop disliking Siobhan!

Alexis, seriously - kidnapping charges.

She's not even pregnant yet, so slow your roll, Molly.

May 6th, 2011

Elizabeth keeps her presence at the courthouse secret, so Lucky and Siobhan are married. She runs into Jason at the hospital just after he has a dream about Jake, and they talk about their son. It turns out it's Jake's birthday, but Lucky doesn't remember until he looks at his wedding license. Elizabeth gets a birthday gift Lucky ordered for Jake and returns it to Lucky, accidentally interrupting his wedding night with Siobhan. Sonny and Dante connect Brenda's decision to have the DNA test with Lucian's disappearance and decide that Suzanne may have taken him to keep Brenda from finding out he wasn't her child. Dante actually does his job and learns that a woman fitting Suzanne's description flew to Arizona with a little boy the same night Lucian disappeared. Jax pushes Brenda to offer a reward for Lucian, and when Sonny tells her it's a bad idea, she thinks it's because his children are more important than hers. Luke tells Ethan he can't be an alcoholic because then he'd be like his father. Lulu finds them drinking together and fights with Ethan, who won't turn against Luke. Sam's surgery goes fine, but that doesn't mean it was successful.

I love how there's someone working for the show who keeps track of people's birthdays, but no one there will keep track of things like how a character would actually act in a given situation.

If you wanted more evidence that Sonny couldn't care less about Lucian, look no farther than the fact that he doesn't call him by his name. It's always "Brenda's son" or "little boy" or "the kid."

Wait, Luke's father might not be dead? Please, please can we meet him?

The show is stupid for getting rid of Nikolas. Now who will offer to finance things for Lucky?

May 7th, 2011

Next week: Aiden's paternity is slowly becoming the worst-kept secret in Port Charles, Matt may have found an ingenious way to distract Maxie, and Suzanne sucks at hiding.

May 9th, 2011

Elizabeth quickly leaves Lucky and Siobhan alone, and the two of them end up talking about Jake. Later, Siobhan visits Elizabeth's house, gets snoopy, and reads the test results. Sonny asks a mob associate to keep an eye out for Suzanne, ignoring Dante when he complains that getting more mobsters involved is a bad idea. In turn, Brenda and Jax ignore Sonny's wishes and make a public plea for information on Lucian. Brenda's also now convinced that Suzanne has him, though she hasn't figured out that he's not her son. Carly stops by to talk to Jax about Josslyn but backs off when Brenda throws a hissy fit. Jason tells her she was smart to do so, telling her to never give Josslyn up to anyone. Abby wants to plead guilty using the battered-woman defense, but Michael doesn't want her to risk the possibility of going to jail. Johnny promises to help Abby find out the hit woman. Meanwhile, Zacchara tells Michael he wants to repay him (in a good way) for taking Claudia off his hands. Then he hits on Carly. Lucky asks Jason if he thinks it was disrespectful to get married on Jake's birthday. Jason says that as long as they're good to people, they're respecting Jake's memory. Zacchara tells Johnny there's no such thing as a truce with Sonny, and he's putting things in motion so Johnny can gain control. It's too soon to tell if Sam will be able to have a baby.

This is exactly why I don't leave important letters lying around. Of course, no one I know is that INTRUSIVE, SIOBHAN, YOU FREAKING NUT.

But Dante, if you let the mob handle the Lucian situation, you can continue to sit around and do nothing!

Wow, Brenda. Way to totally not care about a toddler who just had an organ transplant to cure her cancer.

It's probably bad that whenever Abby and Michael have a scene together, my automatic response is to sigh and say, "I'm already bored."

May 10th, 2011

Carly gets increasingly angry with Zacchara, who gets increasingly amused. She forbids Michael from having any contact with Zacchara or Johnny, but he tells Jason that he needs them to help him clear Abby's name. Carly then tries to hire Shawn to kill Zacchara. He tells her to let Sonny and Jason handle the situation, but Carly doesn't like Jason's idea of handling things. Siobhan sort of confronts Elizabeth about Aiden's paternity, but Elizabeth thinks she's talking about something else, so the secret stays a secret. Unless Siobhan decides to spill it to Lucky. Lucky asks Jason not to kill Luke no matter how many of Jason's buttons he pushes. Jason warns that he can only be pushed so far. Johnny offers to help Abby disappear, but she doesn't want to run away from her problems. Zacchara approaches her, feigning concern with her legal troubles until Michael steps in. Matt tries to distract Maxie from the Elizabeth situation. Later, she finds a ring in his jacket pocket. Lisa researches death by gas leak.

I think it's very interesting that Carly called on Shawn before Jason. Who knew she could do something that different?

Siobhan, if you tell Lucky that he's Aiden's father (odds: 10 to 1), I will take back one mean thing I've said about you.

Dang, that's a big ring. Neurosurgeons really do make a lot of money.

There's a joke in there somewhere about the remaining screw and Lisa having a screw loose, but it's not quite all together. Like the easel. Or Lisa! There you go.

May 11th, 2011

Michael and Abby think they might be able to trust Johnny. Zacchara disapproves of Johnny's plan to basically hold Michael hostage against Sonny so Sonny can't make a move against him. Zacchara wants Johnny to play hard and take down all his enemies. Lisa uses Patrick's credit card to make it look like they have a secret love nest, and possibly like Patrick plans to kill Robin so they can be together. Luke tries to get Carly to let him stay at the hotel to make up for the fact that she lost him his diamonds. She says she'll only allow it if he goes to rehab. Matt tells Maxie the ring isn't his, which leads her to think he's going to give it to someone else. It's actually Robin's; Patrick had it cleaned and Matt picked it up for him. Then he and Maxie play Twister (not a euphemism). Lucky assures Siobhan that he and Elizabeth are over, then asks Luke not to do anything that will get him killed.

Why is this murder plot SO FREAKING BORING?

How weird that Lisa is a better villain than Johnny, who's supposed to be a mobster.

Dear writers, please give Jason Cook more to do. He's funny but we never get to see it.

Did we really just watch an hour of people talking about pieces of paper?

May 12th, 2011

Spinelli finds Suzanne San Antonio, so Sonny and Dante make plans to go get Lucian/non-Lucian and take care of Suzanne. Sonny asks Carly to come along as a babysitter, basically. Brenda has a meltdown about Lucian, which makes Sonny decide she can't find out about the rescue mission. He orders Spinelli not to tell Brenda anything, which goes exactly the way you'd expect. Jax still refuses to budge on where Josslyn will be living. Jason and Sam talk about baby plans and Jake, and in general reiterate that they're the most stable couple on the show.

Oh, yeah, it's completely believable that Carly would ditch Josslyn just as she's getting out of the hospital, at the beginning of what's sure to be a nasty custody battle, to go retrieve the child of a woman she hates. It's also completely believable that Jason knows absolutely nothing that's going on right now. Is this bizarro world?

Okay, Brenda, tone it down. Go put some soothing music on that iPod you keep carrying everywhere.

Carly has a lot more restraint than me (who knew), because if I were her, I'd respond to every accusation with, "At least my brother's not a TERRORIST."

Alec is freaking adorable. That is all.

May 13th, 2011

Sonny, Carly, and Dante get to Suzanne's house just after she leaves with Alec. Carly spots a picture of Alec and the three of them piece together that Lucian was a decoy and Alec is Brenda's real son. Thanks to Spinelli, they not only find Suzanne's car but manage to stop it, then meet up with her at a playground. Carly takes Alec to the car while Sonny and Dante try to take control of Suzanne. She holds a knife to Sonny's throat and Dante draws his gun, threatening to shoot despite Sonny's protests that she'll kill him. From the car, Carly and Alec hear a shot. Jason refuses to let Jax take Josslyn out of the hospital until Carly returns. Sonny and Carly have a completely inappropriately timed conversation about their relationship in front of Dante. Jax warns Brenda that if Carly and Sonny are together, they're probably having sex. A visit with Josslyn lifts Elizabeth's spirits. Sam confides in Spinelli that she's not sure she wants to open herself up to the possibility of losing another child. Jason tells Shawn that part of guarding Carly is protecting her from herself. This time, Spinelli won't tell Brenda anything about what Sonny's up to.

Whatever, Sonny could totally overpower Suzanne. Also, I'm inclined to believe that he told Dante he couldn't make the shot because he wants him to shoot, and he knows Dante will always do the opposite of what Sonny tells him. Oh, and by the way, Dante, if Jason were there, Suzanne would already be dead.

While I get Jason's point, it's not like Jax is taking Josslyn out of the country. He's taking her, like, two miles away. To a hotel Carly co-owns. Yeah, yeah, I know, it's the principle of the matter.

Jax is totally right about Sonny and Carly always getting back together, but...but...Shawn!

Why do Carly and Sonny always have such horrible timing when it comes to personal conversations?

May 14th, 2011

Next week: Everyone who thinks her crazy plan is going to go off without a hitch, raise your hand. Not so fast, Suzanne and Lisa.

May 16th, 2011

Sonny and Dante manage to get the upper hand on Suzanne without resorting to violence. Dante escorts Suzanne back to Port Charles while Sonny and Carly take Alec and discuss how angry Brenda will be. Brenda's shocked to hear that Alec, not Lucian, is her son and that she has to become a mother all over again. Jax and Jason argue about Josslyn forever, but ultimately Alexis points out that Jason can't keep Jax from taking her home. Carly returns just after they leave and immediately heads over to get her daughter. Alexis advises Sam to think hard about what she really wants before she tries to get pregnant. Sam tells Spinelli that she enjoys having a close relationship with Alexis, then admits that she still hasn't made up her mind about having a baby. Dante confides in Lulu that the trip with Sonny has made him see his father in a different way. Lulu asks Michael where the line is between caring and giving up on someone.

I love it when they give Sonny humorous stuff to do. His scenes with Dante and Carly were great.

Okay, I'm not going to say that I want Carly and Sonny to get back together, wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. They have fun chemistry.

God bless you, Jason, for saying what I've been saying for ages: If Jax is going to mention the bad people Carly associates with, we get to mention Jerry.

Those Lulu/Michael scenes were kind of random. I think they needed something to fill a few minutes.

May 17th, 2011

Brenda is just as furious over Sonny not telling her about the rescue plan as she is that Carly has now spent more time with Alec than she is. She accuses Sonny of taking Carly with him because he's mad that she offered the reward against his wishes. By the end of the evening, they're more aligned with their exes than with each other. Jax wins this round of the Josslyn battle, but Sonny is on Carly's side, so he'll probably lose the war. Suzanne tells Brenda that she needs to take Alec and leave Port Charles. Thanks to Kristina, Lisa is able to get into Patrick and Robin's basement and rig the heater to go splodey. Elizabeth freaks out when Cameron leaves the house, and he calls Lucky to come tend to her. Lulu thinks Brenda should shut up about the details of the rescue mission since at least her son is alive.

Sonny's kind of an idiot to let Carly come in and play with Alec. On the other hand, Brenda's really, really annoying right now, so I don't care.

I'm surprised Carly didn't just grab Josslyn and run.

Enjoy Hell, Lisa. Say hi to Claudia.

Hee, I love Lulu. There's no point in her getting involved in this plotline, but whatever.

May 18th, 2011

Luke offers to help Carly get something on Jax, but she's still sticking to her bottom line. Later, Luke listens in as Jason assures Carly that Jax won't get Josslyn, then starts saying stupid things. Lucky stops by Johnny's to make sure Zacchara's following the rules of his parole, and Zacchara taunts him about Jake until Lucky punches him. Lucky shares the story with Luke, adding that he's not staying away to punish Luke, but to help both of them. Ethan realizes that Kristina's been taking hydrocodone, not herbal supplements, and takes her pills. While he fills Johnny in, Kristina confronts Lisa. Lucky finds one of Kristina's pills on the floor at Kelly's and contemplates taking it, then destroys it. Jason tries to distract Michael with the Josslyn situation, but Michael doesn't want to leave Abby to fend for herself. He also wants to play dumb with Zacchara in hopes of getting some information about the hit woman. Patrick gets an alert that there's been strange activity on his credit card, but Robin bought a hot tub, so he doesn't look into it. Though he probably will since the company froze his account. Steven and Olivia continue to be adorable, this time with musical accompaniment.

"I don't care if I have to drug his a$# and put him in a laundry cart." Haaaaaaaa. No one's mentioned that in years.

Yeah, I bet Ethan can ID a hydrocodone pill on sight.

I'm thinking you shouldn't buy a hot tub without consulting your husband when you're already having marital problems.

Did Olivia call Steven "Doc"? Just when I thought they couldn't get any cuter...

May 19th, 2011

Lisa tries to twist Kristina's accusations around and make it seem like Kristina knew what was going on the whole time. She then breaks into Robin and Patrick's house to spring a gas leak, but Robin hears her in the basement and goes down to investigate. Luke keeps antagonizing Jason, even getting physical with him, but Carly makes him back off, finally turning on him completely. Jason refuses to fight back because he wants Luke to suffer. Later, Luke tells Ethan that he knows what he needs to do. Johnny suggests to Ethan that Kristina might be lying about the pills, so Ethan asks her for the truth. She promises that her part in the hydrocodone situation was completely innocent. He tells her to call if Lisa gets in touch with her, and she's giddy over the excuse to stay close. Luke warns Ethan that getting involved with Kristina is a bad idea. Alexis works out a deal for Jax and Carly to split custody of Josslyn, but he disapproves. She admits that she feels uncomfortable fighting for Carly to lose rights to her daughter, and warns Jax that if he keeps pushing, everything will blow up in his face. Jax ignores her and digs up dirt on Shawn, which he shares with Carly. Lisa swears to Johnny that she hates Patrick, but he's not convinced and even goes so far as to warn Patrick that Lisa�s still unstable. He also asks Olivia if there's ever a time when it's okay to give up on someone. Alexis tells Jason that she admires him for giving up Jake. However, she doesn't get why it's okay for him to have kids now.

Does Lisa have an endgame here? Her motives are certainly clear, but what does she want to come out of this?

MOTEs of the day (seriously, I'm really bad about these) goes to Jason Thompson for the way he slipped "you look really cute today" into his pleas for Robin to call the credit card company for him, and to Kimberly McCullough for her nonchalant "thank you" back.

The fact that Shawn used to be a hitman for a notorious mobster isn't enough dirt for Jax?

Olivia two days in a row?? Is it my birthday again?

May 20th, 2011

Lisa locks Robin in the basement, making the mistake of telling her exactly what she's planned and what she expects to happen. When she comes back to gloat over Robin's body, she discovers that Robin's not even close to dead. Brenda complains a bunch about Carly's part in the rescue mission, then tells Carly she's not mad. Carly just uses it as a chance to tell Jax that children should be with their mothers. Sonny admits to Jason that he's thinking about leaving Brenda so Alec will be safe. Shawn tries to preemptively quit so whatever it is he did doesn't come out, but Carly changes his mind. Kristina tells Michael about the hydrocodone and swears him to secrecy. He doesn't like the idea of Ethan helping her and says he's using her. Alexis gets Sam thinking about what having a baby with Jason will really mean.

Can't wait to find out how Robin managed to not breathe in gas for an hour.

If we have to keep hearing references to some vague incident involving Shawn, I'm going to be ticked.

Whatever, Kristina, with your neuroses and daddy issues, you're one Yale rejection letter away from taking your clothes off for money.

They fired Ingo Rademacher. I would care if they hadn't ruined the character years ago. (I'm more concerned with the possibility that this means Jerry will never come back.) Hopefully they'll have Jax and Brenda run off together, because they've ruined her, too.

May 21st, 2011

Next week: Career week, apparently.

May 23rd, 2011

Not only does Lisa tell Robin straight out that she tried to kill her, but Mac and Patrick are listening in at the time. Oh, and Robin recorded everything on her cell phone, so Lisa's arrested for attempted murder. It turns out Robin and Patrick figured out Lisa's plans and were a step ahead of her the whole time. Lisa uses her one phone call to beg Johnny to help her, but he leaves her to her own devices. She doesn't help matters by asking him not to give up on her like he gave up on Claudia. Robin and Patrick celebrate their freedom from Lisa and Robin puts her wedding ring back on. Michael breaks into Johnny's penthouse to snoop around and is caught by a shotgun-wielding Anthony. Johnny stops Anthony from doing anything, and Anthony infers that he planned the whole thing so Michael will owe them. He then proceeds to make plans to go after Brenda. Brenda wonders how safe she and Alec are, which is nice timing. Jax won't shut up about Josslyn's safety, and he may be wearing Carly down.

Ten bucks says Lisa's found not guilty by reason of insanity.

Hey, it's Mac! I've missed him.

Don't worry, Michael - if Anthony had shot you, he'd go right back to prison for being a convited felon with a firearm.

Carly, stop listening to Jax. And just hold on for a little while, because soon you won't have to deal with him at all.

May 24th, 2011

Luke breaks into the Haunted Star and plays baseball with the glassware until Dante shows up to investigate a report of disturbing the peace. Lulu tells Lucky that his approach to helping Luke isn't helping, and she can't ignore him anymore. At the same time, Ethan decides that Lucky's approach is better than his own. Lulu goes to the Haunted Star and starts to clean up the broken glass, but Luke yells at her and scares her off. Dante sends Sonny over to talk to Luke, who has realized he's turning into his father and he has to stop it. He gathers his family at the casino and announces that he'll be going to rehab first thing in the morning. Lucky wonders why he can't go tonight. Kristina goes to Brenda for advice on dressing older so she can land Ethan. Sonny overhears her admitting to her crush.

Today's episode felt a little rushed, like Tony Geary planned a vacation and they had to squeeze a bunch of stuff in to get him out in time, but I'll take it.

Why was Nikolas there, though? It's almost like they've forgotten he's not Luke's son. Kind of like they've forgotten that Molly isn't Sonny's daughter.

Dear Julie Marie Berman: This is why you have an Emmy.

Funny that the day Kristina thinks she dresses too young is the same day I thought, "What a cute dress" five minutes earlier.

Can someone please let Dante get a haircut? He's verging on that horrible time period where Steve Burton could practically make a ponytail.

May 25th, 2011

Lucky thinks Luke is providing himself with a cover so he can split. He antagonizes Luke to get him to see how close he is to disaster, earning himself a smack in the face. Luke announces that he'll go to rehab tonight, but when he arrives, the first thing he does is try to buy himself a drink. Sonny makes the incredibly dumb move of forbidding Kristina from dating Ethan, despite the fact that she's 18 and can do whatever she wants, and despite the fact that even Brenda knows it's a bad idea. Sonny also tells Ethan to tread lightly. Lucky worries that if Luke quits rehab, he'll be lost forever. Ethan's worried about genetics dictating his future. Having hit a dead end with Brenda, Kristina turns to Maxie for a fashion makeover. Maxie and Siobhan each find out the other knows about Aiden's paternity. Maxie thinks Siobhan won't tell Lucky because she's afraid he'll go back to Elizabeth.

I would hate to be an actor nominated for a supporting-actor Emmy next year. They don't even need to fill the category; just engrave Jonathan Jackson's name on the thing right now.

Everyone in this Kristina/Brenda/Sonny situation is an idiot. If I were Brenda, I would call Alexis immediately and let her deal with it.

I just want to state for the record that when Brenda and Sonny started dating, she was 18 (if that) and he was...well, much older than 18. So...yeah. Pots. Kettles. All that good stuff.

Why does everyone think Lucky will go back to Elizabeth if he finds out he's Aiden's father? Why don't they think he'll be furious with her for keeping the truth from him (um, again)?

May 26th, 2011

Carly and Jax manage to compromise on something, but he's just lulling her into a false sense of security so he can file for emergency custody, even though Alexis still thinks it's a horrible idea. Jason alerts Carly, then sticks around so he's there when Jax comes to get Josslyn. Anthony's hit woman demands more money now that she knows exactly who Michael is. Johnny overhears Anthony's plans to meet with her, ties up his father, and goes to meet her instead. Abby shows up at the penthouse looking for Johnny and instead finds a bound and gagged Anthony. She accuses him of framing her for Brandon's murder, but he claims Johnny's behind it and his framing him for the frame. Lulu worries that Luke will be different when he gets out of rehab. Dante and Maxie want her to focus on her own life now that she's done all she can for Luke. Instead, Lulu quits her job. Abby's preliminary hearing is set, and Michael wants to run off with her if they can't find the real killer by then. Sam learns that she should be able to have a baby, but she and Jason agree not to rush into anything. They also agree to be honest with each other, leading him to admit that he's not sure what he wants.

Isn't Jason Josslyn's godfather? The judge might be interested to know that Jax didn't find him too dangerous to be his child's godfather.

Why did Jason tell Carly about the emergency custody order? I have a feeling they couldn't get Carolyn Hennesy for the episode and had to rewrite that part.

Johnny, you're kind of a moron. You know that, right?

Abby needs a job, right? Maybe she can take Lulu's place.

May 27th, 2011

Michael and Johnny record enough evidence from the hit woman to get Abby exonerated, though Jason isn't happy to hear that they worked together. He sneaks into the PCPD and catches Anthony talking to the hit woman about helping her escape from lockup after Abby's officially cleared. Jax gets madder about Carly, Jason, and the fact that Alexis isn't completely on his side. Carly points out that letting Jax take custody of Morgan made things worse for him, which is why she's not fighting for full custody. Alexis notes that this is what the judge will want to hear, and Jax is making himself look worse and worse by continuing to fight when there's no reason to. Elizabeth comforts a woman whose son was hit by a car, then admits to Robin that she doesn't understand why this woman's boy got to live while Jake didn't. Anthony offers Abby money to keep dating Michael and steer him towards the Zacchara organization. Lulu plans to run the Haunted Star while Luke's gone, but Carly wonders if that's what she really wants to do.

Can the murder plot be over already? No one cares!

Hey, Jax, keep bringing up Jake. You're certainly making me fall in love with you.

Dear writers, can you keep Elizabeth like this? I haven't hated her in forever.

Maybe Lulu should run Kelly's, though I guess that place just runs itself, eh?

May 28th, 2011

Next week: Murder! Escaped criminals! Jax gets punched in the face! Why did they wait until the end of sweeps for the good stuff?

May 31st, 2011

Michael wants to work for Johnny, but only if Johnny agrees not to violate the Zacchara/Corinthos truce. Johnny accepts the terms but wants Michael to give the idea more thought. Anthony offers Jason a job, with expected results. Jason thinks Anthony arranged for the hit woman to get caught, and warns Michael that Johnny could be helping him control the entire situation. Speaking of controlling the situation, Anthony gets the hit woman out of jail, then kills her in the penthouse. Sonny and Brenda run into Kristina, who's again wearing a completely age-inappropriate dress, and Sonny and Kristina start fighting. Brenda sends Sonny away for girl talk (which doesn't get anywhere), and Sonny complains to Jason about Brenda's lack of boundaries. When she gets home, he tells her to stop trying to parent his children. She replies that if he won't let her get close to the people he's close to, they have a problem. Hey, did you know Lisa's crazy? Lulu thinks that taking care of the Haunted Star will be something she and Luke can share, since she doesn't have any kind of connection like that to him. Dante thinks she's setting herself up for disappointment. He's right in a way he doesn't realize: When Lulu goes to visit Luke at Shadybrook, she learns that he split.

How does Johnny know Michael isn't going to infiltrate his organization? This whole thing is so dumb.

Sonny, maybe you should listen to Brenda. You clearly need all the help you can get in the parenting department.

Speaking of which, if Sonny isn't going to tell Alexis what's going on with Kristina, he should at least tell Sam. She might actually be able to talk some sense into the girl.

Lulu's surprise at luke not being at Shadybrook is equally surprising to me. She's met him, right?

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