General Hospital blog - November, 2004

November 1st, 2004

Thus ends the two-year-old “Sonny doesn’t know he’s Kristina’s father” storyline. And thus begins the “Sonny wants custody of his daughter” storyline. And who knows how long that’ll last.

Reasons why I despised Carly to the point of wanting to throw something at her today:
1. She made me like her a little, and then she pulled this stuff.
2. She kicked Alexis while she was down.
3. She lied to her husband for nine months.
4. She only decided to tell Sonny about Kristina after Alexis had already decided to, and then she acted like Alexis didn’t want her to.
5. She weighed destroying her marriage against the life of a child.
6. She kept quiet until she’d had sex with her husband again.
7. She was more worried about how Sonny would react to the fact that she’s known the truth for 9 months than about how he would react when he found out he has another child.
8. She pretended that she was the one who had to tell Sonny the truth, when Alexis was perfectly willing.
9. She blasted Alexis for telling Ric before she told Sonny, when Carly herself told Steven and Durant before she told Sonny.
10. She has no sympathy for a woman whose only child might die.

Ric and Alexis, sittin’ in a tree....

Oh, Elizabeth. It’s not that I want Connor to live, or that I’m naïve enough to think that he will live. I just don’t think that you should kill him. Call me crazy for that, but it’s the truth.

Brook, I know you like bad boys and all (most girls do). But you can’t in a million years do better than Lucas. Speaking of Lucas, where is he? Probably crying himself to sleep.

You can tell that Connor’s scar is fake because it’s all shiny, like it’s makeup. It’s almost as fake as his horrible accent.

November 2nd, 2004

Carly’s stock is plummeting in my book, but Sonny’s is rising a little. I have to hand it to him for not going straight after Alexis and yelling at her; instead, he called Courtney and Mike and the three of them got tested. Good to see that he has his priorities in order. Well, except for the whole custody thing. He doesn’t seem to understand that he can see Kristina without completely taking her away from Alexis.

Yes, Carly, it’s all about you. Take Morgan to get tested and shut up.

Poor Elizabeth. Hey, you know, Lucky’s single. You two could get back together....

Sonny in the chapel - DRINK!

November 3rd, 2004

I was so worried that I would miss the wedding. But, yay, I got to see it! And I’m very happy about it.

Will someone please tell Carly that it’s not about her? I think Sonny’s top priority right now is Kristina. So shut up, and stop crying, because it doesn’t make me any more sympathetic to you.

I kind of had a pool going in my mind as to who would have sex first - Dillon and Georgie, Jax and Courtney, or Ric and Alexis. Jax and Courtney won, and I think Ric and Alexis will come in second. Dillon and Georgie...well, at this rate, they’ll be married before they ever have sex.

Sam, stop jinxing your baby.

November 4th, 2004

Holy emotional blackmail, Batman! Michael needs more effective parenting. And therapy. And a nanny who actually knows where he is at all times.

I firmly believe that, a year ago, Sam would’ve said, “No way in the world am I inducing labor to save another child’s life.” Now she actually considered it. This doesn’t make me like her any more (because, as far as I know, pigs haven’t taken flight yet), but it shows that she’s definitely changed and matured.

Awww, is Diego a wittle jeawous of Jax?

Way to interrupt a man while he’s praying, Steven. (Oh, and also, DRINK!) You’d better tread lightly with me, because I like you now, but most of the people involved with this storyline are starting to get on my nerves (if they weren’t already). Watch yourself, because I don’t want to have to hate you.

How is stem cell use not a contraversy here? Sonny doesn’t seem to have a problem with it. Of course, his interpretation of Catholicism has been pretty loose, so I shouldn’t be surprised.

Best news of the week - Robin Mattson (Heather) is leaving the first week of December. FINALLY!

November 5th, 2004

Next week on GH...

Monday: Sonny contemplates a major decision. (Sonny’s always left making big decisions while women are in labor with his children.)
Tuesday: Luke uncovers the truth about Heather. (I knew I liked you, Luke.)
Wednesday: Sonny’s words alarm Alexis. (As long as Kristina’s okay, Sonny can say whatever he wants and I’ll be happy. Well, not really, but close enough.)
Thursday: Alcazar reaches out to Carly. (Thanks. That’s just what I wanted.)
Friday: Sonny demands full custody of Kristina. (You can demand all you want, buddy, but that doesn’t mean any judge is going to give it to you.)

Oh, look. Sam’s in labor. Raise your hand if you’re surprised.

I don’t know where to start with Emily. Does she understand that Connor was going to kill Nikolas and probably her? Does she understand that Nikolas is the one she should be loyal to? Does she understand that she’s breaking the law? Does she understand that she’s INSANE? And do the writers understand that she’s become so unrecognizable and unrealistic that I can’t even laugh at her anymore?

Yay, Dillon! Way to find Laura! Now just get rid of Heather and tell Luke what’s going on.

Jason, don’t make me yell at you. You know I don’t want to.

Alexis went a little crazy today. And yet I still love her. It would take a lot for me not to like her. She’d probably have to randomly kill someone just for the heck of it. And even then I might still like her, depending on who she killed.

Um...Faith is coming back, right?

November 8th, 2004

Well, GH writers, you’ve killed another baby. I hope you’re proud of yourselves. You know, if you ever get tired of it, you can always write a plot where Sonny learns about safe sex.

Once again, Jason deserves about 1,000 times more than what he gets. He needs a nice girlfriend and some kids of his own.

Dear Emily, you’re a horrible person, and I hope Nikolas dumps you. Also, you’re a horrible liar. Also, when you were in the stairwell with Connor, he looked like he wanted to eat you, and I wanted him to. So there.

Please tell me that they didn’t really play Sarah McLachlan’s “Angel.” Please tell me I imagined that. Seriously, who thought that was a good idea?

November 9th, 2004

This show is all sad now. I want some wacky Luke hijinks or some wacky Dillon hijinks or some amusing Quartermaine fights or something else happy. Stop killing children, writers. It doesn’t make you cool. Thanks for sparing the cute one, though.

Poor Elizabeth. She has no plot, and she’s hardly ever on, and then they make her tell Brook that Ned lied to her and have to tell Jason that he needs to arrange for the baby’s burial. Can’t the writers give Elizabeth something easy to do?

Shut up, Brook. Yeah, your dad lied to you, but I’m going to tell you the same thing I’ve been saying to Carly - it’s not about you. Also, stop it with the “you never wanted to be my dad” argument, because it’s entirely wrong. Find an episode from 1996 and watch it, then apologize for being wrong.

And the winner of the prize for least appropriate apparel to wear to the hospital is...Courtney!

I’m fine with you calling this a miracle, Alexis, but I’m going to have to call it “the writers’ failed attempt at being creative.”

November 10th, 2004

I bet anything that in two weeks, it’ll be like Kristina was never sick.

Nice job trying to steal a page from Buffy, writers. Especially since I can’t decide who’s more annoying, Sam or Dawn.

I always think I won’t be able to hate Emily any more than I already do, but practically every day I’m proven wrong. She chose to stay back with Connor instead of go to the hospital and comfort her brother? Jason, do yourself a favor and start ignoring her, because you deserve a lot better. And Nikolas, why the heck are you putting up with this? Kick Connor out of the house, call the MPs, and tell Emily to shape up or ship out, because you deserve better, too.

Shut up, Michael. You’re seven, and you’ll live where your parents tell you to live.

November 11th, 2004

I hate it when they kill people on this show, because then they’re sad for a long time, and it’s not like you can just say, “Get over it already.”

Did Emily seriously kick Nikolas OUT OF HIS OWN HOUSE so that she could talk to the guy who tried to kill him? Nikolas - DUMP HER. DUMP HER NOW. I’m not even kidding.

Thank you, Carly, for telling Michael what he needed to hear. You may be a bad mother, but with a kid like him, it’s kind of understandable.

Aaaaand Ric has officially gone too far.

November 12th, 2004

Next week on GH...

Monday: Durant finally gets what he’s been waiting for. (I’m guessing that’s evidence against Sonny.)
Tuesday: Sonny walks out on Carly. (Except...she already walked out on him.)
Wednesday: Luke opens up to Skye. (Slow day, huh?)
Thursday: Ric gets the upper hand on Sonny. (Awesome.)
Friday: Carly’s plan to aid Sonny backfires. (Custody trial wackiness?)

Look, Sam, I know you’re upset and all, and I do feel sorry for you, but seriously? Shut up. Someone get the woman a psychiatrist. And also explain the stem cell transplant thing to her, because she obviously doesn’t get it.

What’s with Sonny and female attornies? I’m not sure whether she was wearing heels, but just for the record, Jordan is about 2-3 inches taller than Sonny. Hee hee hee.

Dude, let Kristina get better already.

Sonny and Carly have turned into Monica and Alan, and even Michael knows it. “Why should we move out? You guys are just going to get back together anyway.” Ha!

November 15th, 2004

The people who work for Sonny are idiots. Why would you keep a file full of incriminating evidence? And why wouldn’t you make sure it got directly to him? Max is falling down on the job. On the other hand, some of Sonny’s goons did beat up Diego, so I can’t hate all of them.

They’re going to stop doing bad things to Kristina now, right?

Of course Sam isn’t going to leave town. The writers want to keep torturing me.

Carly’s shirt annoys me. It looks like it shrunk and she just shrugged and said, “Eh, I’ll wear it anyway.”

November 16th, 2004

The evil marriage that never should have been is finally over! Um, right? They’re not going to get back together AGAIN, are they?

Speaking of evil, hi, Durant! Have you met Carly? She likes to hold grudges.

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, Diego.


Maurice Benard (Sonny) and his wife Paula are on Oprah tomorrow, talking about his bipolar disorder. I’m sure that’ll be a lot of fun after the baby’s memorial service on tomorrow’s episode.

November 17th, 2004

Well, that was...depressing.

Did the baby actually have a name? I thought they were going to name her Lila. Was she...not good enough for a name?

Sam is still here...why? They should’ve just killed her off. Now they have to find something for her to do.

Dear Durant, stop that.

November 18th, 2004

Okay, here’s the way things are supposedly going: Maurice Benard and his wife are expecting their third child some time in the next couple of months, and he asked for paternity leave to be with his family. So they’re going to send Sonny to jail while he’s gone. In other words, he ain’t getting out of today’s arrest for awhile.

I wonder what Durant would have said to Ric if he hadn’t known that Carly was listening.

Maria wants Diego to leave Port Charles? Maria is my new favorite character.

Sam can’t have another baby. Sam can leave, that’s what Sam can do.

November 19th, 2004

Next week on GH... (there are a bunch this week, and I don’t know which days they fall on, so I’ll just put them in a list)

• Steven rescues Carly. (Eh, make her rescue herself.)
• Ric’s aparment is robbed. (How can it be robbed when it was just burned down?)
• Durant gives Carly an alibi. (Way to obey the law, Mr. Federal Prosecutor.)
• Alexis gets the goods on Sonny. (Didn’t she already have them?)
• Nikolas is arrested. (Grr, Connor.)
• Luke makes Heather believe he’s on her side. (Ha ha, stupid Heather.)
• Alcazar and Lois come clean. (What, about all the sex?)
• Jason plants a listening device. (Will it be on Ric or Durant? My money’s on Durant.)

How much do I care about Carly getting out of the fire? Slightly more than I care about someone finding Sam before she freezes to death.

HA HA! Connor’s in for it now!

Yay, Edward’s back! This means Heather can start packing her bags.

November 22nd, 2004

Was there a three-for-one deal on concussions today? Carly, Steven, and Lucky all got knocked out. I think that’s a tad too much.

Carly’s an idiot, as well as a horrible friend. First, she sets fire to Ric’s apartment when she’s not even sure that the evidence against Sonny is there. (Why wasn’t at the PCPD? I thought Ric was smarter than that.) Then, she doesn’t make sure she can get out of the apartment. Then, instead of running away after Steven gets her out, she sticks around and lets him go back in. Then, after he’s knocked out, she...leaves. How kind.

Mac is also kind of an idiot, since he left Lucky and Emily alone with Connor. Repeat after me, Mac - “backup.”

Emily, however, is actually smarter than I usually give her credit for. Good for her for calling the MPs instead of the helicopter pilot. Lucky is also smart; I figured he might be playing possum.

TONY! What a great surprise. And it’s the holiday season, so maybe we’ll see him around again soon.

From commercials and the spoilers I mentioned on Friday, I’m pretty sure that Alexis got the file from Ric’s apartment. If so, good for her! And in that case, I guess Ric’s apartment isn’t really being robbed, since she lives there and, technically, owns half of his property. Speaking of Alexis...aww, is someone a little jealous of Elizabeth?

Sam and Jason are so boring that whenever they’re onscreen, I stop listening. I can’t believe they’re putting these two together. Can they just kill me now?

November 23rd, 2004

I guess we can add Steven to the A Wig is All You Need to Disguise Yourself Club.

So, the four teenagers told their parents that they were going to look at colleges, and then they flew to Mexico? Very strange. It’s funny that Dillon has now been arrested twice in third-world countries. (I can’t remember the circumstances of the first time, but I remember him acting crazy and Tracy having to bail him out.)

Maria looks frighteningly like Lily. And I don’t get the pendant thing. Assuming that Diego is Alcazar’s son, as the rumors go, then Diego and Maria would have the same mother, probably Sophie. Does that mean that Maria got the pendant from Sophie? And that she doesn’t want Diego to go back to Port Charles because she knows that Alcazar is there? Plus, assuming that the pendant belonged to Sophie, how would Dillon recognize it? Does Alcazar have one too? This storyline is already too complicated.

I knew Alexis got the file! But her blackmailing skills are somewhat lacking.

Ned’s date’s name was Apple? Hee. Lois gets the quote of the day for that scene: “Lucky for her, her mother wasn’t craving kumquats during her pregnancy.” And Alcazar gets the best response: “This from a woman who named her daughter after a borough in New York.”

November 24th, 2004

Everyone is blasting Nikolas for making a confession because...he’s ruining Emily’s life? Way to be supportive, everyone. Oh, I forgot - it’s always all about Emily. Speaking of her, she and Nikolas were going to get married on a Wednesday? What’s up with that?

I bet anything that that’s Luke on the couch instead of Edward.

Jason may be smarter than everyone else on the show.

I kind of want a storyline where Sam loses her mind. That would rock.

The “next week on General Hospital” thing confused me, so I went to Zap2It and looked up tomorrow’s episode. The site says that they’re showing an episode from the Big February Sweeps Fire Extravaganza. Part of me is sad, because we won’t get to see the Quartermaines not eating turkey. But I’m also kind of excited, because I liked that storyline, and it’ll be fun to see an episode from it again.

November 25th, 2004

Um...everything on today’s episode is from nine months ago. But I’ll comment on it anyway, since I didn’t the first time. :)

Justus was kind of dumb for saying, “There’s no way they could have survived that.” Dude, at least look. Carly and Sonny both walked out of there pretty much fine.

Ahh, Capelli. I don’t miss you at all.

Things changed a lot in the last nine months - Courtney and Jason split up, Elizabeth and Ric split up, a bunch of people died. I don’t really miss any of them, though, so seeing them again didn’t make much of a difference for me.

Lucky’s hair still looked good in this episode. Alcazar’s didn’t. My, how things have changed.

November 26th, 2004

Next week on GH...

Monday: Ric realizes what Alexis is really up to. (So much for that plan.)
Tuesday: Carly vows to beat Durant at his own game. (That should be interesting.)
Wednesday: Luke tells Heather what she wants to hear. (I’m not sure I want to know what that is.)
Thursday: Skye continues to lose her grip on reality. (Aren’t they doing this storyline on All My Children? And I wanted it for Sam, not Skye!)
Friday: Sonny gets an upper hand with Alexis. (That won’t last long.)

November 29th, 2004

Just to warn you, I’m going to have a lot to say about Emily and Nikolas’ wedding this week. So if you don’t want to read it, I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t want to, either. Anyway - I think it’s ridiculous. What judge in his right mind would let a man accused of killing a family member out of jail so he can marry his girlfriend? (And don’t forget that she witnessed the murder, so shouldn’t it look suspicious that they’re getting married?) I can’t believe everyone is helping Nikolas get out of jail so that Emily will be happy. Because God forbid she doesn’t get her special, perfect wedding day where she’s the princess and everyone worships her and adores her and gives her flowers and she gets to wear a crown. We’ll just add this to the top of the list of reasons why I HATE EMILY.

Alexis rocks. You have to love a woman who promises her ex that she’ll destroy incriminating evidence if he gives her full custody of her daughter, then turns around and admits to her new husband that she’s going to turn him in anyway. Brilliant.

Heather really IS insane! It wasn’t just an insult!

Sonny might also be insane. Run, Meyer, run!

November 30th, 2004

Wait...I actually have to sit through Princess Emily’s Perfect Fairy Tale Wedding? (I’m totally going to trademark that.) But...but...I don’t wanna! Also, why is Jason giving Emily marriage advice? She was married before! True, it was a dismal failure, and she seems to have completely blocked it from her mind, but still.

Oh, how wacky - Elizabeth thinks that Steven has a crush on a random nurse. Hey, writers, if you want to give Elizabeth something to do, I have some suggestions. You could have her get back together with Lucky. Or you could have her get back together with Lucky. Or...I don’t know...YOU COULD HAVE HER GET BACK TOGETHER WITH LUCKY.

Isn’t Connor supposed to be in military prison? Am I forgetting something?

Manipulations aside (and that was rotten of him), Sonny gave Kristina an advent calendar. Adorable!

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