General Hospital blog - November, 2014

November 1st, 2014

Next week: The Great Corinthos Disaster of 2014.

November 3rd, 2014

Franco does a slow burn at the wedding, first revealing that Carly and Sonny slept together, then that Sonny and Ava had sex in the Quartermaine crypt, and finally that Sonny killed A.J. Morgan approves of Sonny's plans for Ava, as long as the baby's kept safe. Sonny promises that he wasn't staking out the brownstone, making Morgan think it was Nina. Before they can head over to find out, Max is shot. Nina moves on to step two of her plan, kick-starting Ava's labor. Anna gives Duke the chance to recant the false alibi he gave Sonny, but he sticks to his story. Elizabeth objects to Jason's discharge from the hospital, then announces that he can stay with her. Silas encounters Madeline, who pretends she has no idea where Silas is.

I'd like to know how they plan to keep Sonny out of prison now that the DA has heard him confess to murder.

Thank you, Lucas, for getting the kids out of there. I'm surprised the show had them stay as long as they did.

It's not just you, Lucy. Weddings that Maxie plans don't go well either.

Awww, Max! He just wanted to give candy to trick-or-treaters! P.S. Who's letting their kids trick-or-treat at Sonny's house?

Someone get Maura West some waterproof mascara, please.

Why doesn't Elizabeth get Jason transferred to another hospital?

November 4th, 2014

Michael realizes the extent of Sonny and Carly's cover-up when she admits that she's known Sonny was A.J.'s killer since the day A.J. died. He tells Carly how horrible she is and renounces his family. Nina delivers Ava's baby, calling upon her experience having birthed a foal, then plans to head out of town with her mother and "daughter." Having shot Max, Heather returns to the warehouse to mess with Shawn and Jordan a little before possibly shooting one or both of them. Max can only tell Sonny and Morgan that a woman shot him, and Sonny wonders if Ava's responsible. Madeline sends Silas to Maxie's apartment, telling him Nina's there, but he only finds Nathan. The two of them figure out that Madeline and Nina are probably working together, so they turn to Obrecht for help finding them. Obrecht disapproves of Madeline and Nina's shenanigans, in case you care what she thinks.

Michael and Nathan should take the baby and flee town. They're the only normal people in their families, and that baby has no chance otherwise.

I'm starting to think Ava's the crazy one. Does she not get that Nina was planning all along to take the baby?

Also, good luck trying to appeal to Madeline as a fellow mother. She already screwed over another mother today.

Was Heather shooting Max part of Franco's plan? What was the point? Was it just a way to distract Sonny?

November 5th, 2014

Michael heads straight to Sonny's, picks up Max's gun, and contemplates using it on his father. Dante arrives, investigating Max's shooting, and Michael pretends he's not armed or angry. Dante tells him that Sonny's a suspect in A.J.'s murder and warns him not to do anything. Carly's furious with Franco for using Michael to get revenge on her and Sonny, but she's also relieved that he no longer has any power over her. Unfortunately, as soon as she leaves the Haunted Star, she runs into Heather. Ava reveals that Madeline hired her to come between Nina and Silas, and basically financed her gallery because she hated her son-in-law. While Madeline tries to get Nina to leave with the baby, Ava attempts to turn daughter against mother, warning that Nina can't trust Madeline. She's unsuccessful, and to add insult to injury, Sonny's arrived. Kiki tries to get in touch with Michael, unaware that Heather's preparing to shoot her on the docks. Scott is eager to bust Sonny for murder, but Bobbie points out that he'd also be busting Carly for covering it up. Morgan asks Sonny to have mercy on Ava. Silas and Sam kill time by getting caught up on Nina's recent activities. Julian tells Alexis that he's willing to bank his bone marrow in case Danny needs it in the future, even if it means he's vulnerable to Sonny again. It's a moot point right now, though, since Danny's second test results come back negative.

If I had to decide who's having the worst week, I wouldn't even know where to begin. Right now it's between Michael, Carly, and Ava.

So I guess Max and Diane are back together? Cool.

What's the point of having Sam at the hospital if she's not going to run into Jason?

Once again, I'm impressed with the set dressers. The campaign posters on the docks were a nice touch.

November 6th, 2014

Ava only manages to slow Sonny down by telling him that Nina and Madeline took the baby. He's still determined to kill her, but is interrupted by Michael. Franco and Heather take Carly to the warehouse where Heather stashed Jordan and Shawn (who talked her out of hurting them). Then Franco turns on Heather, announcing that he's going to kill all four of them. Heather's symbolic of all the women who have ever lied to him, especially Carly. Instead of killing anyone, he just locks them in together. Kiki tells Morgan what happened at the wedding and worries that Michael's going to go after Sonny. Morgan's sure he won't, since Sonny's in a place where Michael will never find him. Kiki's confused, so Morgan reveals that Sonny's going after Ava for killing Connie. Dante takes Franco's recording to Anna, who isn't sure it'll stand up in court. Scott gets a warrant for Sonny's arrest, having decided not to care that prosecuting Carly will make Bobbie turn against him. While awaiting the election results at Felicia's campaign headquarters (the Floating Rib), Duke, Mac, Felicia, and Lucy learn from Bobbie that Sonny confessed to killing A.J. Duke wants to warn Sonny, but he should be more concerned about the fact that his girlfriend's about to arrest him for perjury and obstruction of justice.

Taking a drink every time someone on this show pulls out a gun might get you drunker than the Halloween Elsa drinking game.

What a stupid plan, Franco. At least set fire to the warehouse. Also, Shawn, if you're wondering when the moment was when you missed your easy chance to overtake Franco, it was when he had his back to you.

No Maxie at the Floating Rib?

Where was Silas during this episode, besides not checking on Ava?

November 7th, 2014

Michael lets Ava leave, then spends the rest of the episode yelling at Sonny and threatening to kill him. Silas and Kiki catch up with each other and realize that, since Morgan's not with Ava, she's probably in some trouble. Silas also somehow figures out that the false test results were a ploy to get him out of the safehouse. He and Kiki come across Ava and get her to the hospital. Dante figures out that Michael took Max's gun from Sonny's house and is going after their father. Morgan eventually agrees to take him to the brownstone. Nina and Madeline hide out at the Rendezvous Motel, and Nina now appears to be in full-blown psychosis, thinking the baby is really hers. She also thinks that her and Silas' marriage would have been just fine if Madeline hadn't sent Ava along to screw things up. Franco's like, "Now that I've gone crazy and messed up everyone's lives, I'm kind of lonely." Anna arrests Duke, who makes no apologies for his crimes. Bobbie thinks Lucy has a crush on Duke, which seems pretty accurate. Nathan pretends to be helpful but really just stands around and wonders where Nina is.

I wish there could be some kind of tension about the Sonny/Michael scenes, but obviously Sonny isn't going to die, so they're just kind of there.

What's with the Rendezvous Motel and newborns?

That baby is way too quiet to be a Corinthos or a Jerome.

Ugh, stop trying to make yourself look like a good guy, Duke. Just go to jail. And send Carlos out when you get there.

Arrested: Duke Lavery
Born: unnamed Jerome/Corinthos baby
Broke up: Carly Jacks and Franco Whatever
Injured: Max Giambetti
Kidnapped: Jordan Ashford, Shawn Butler, Carly Jacks, unnamed Jerome/Corinthos baby, Heather Webber

Week in review:
Funniest moments (intentional): Jordan saying Heather pulled "a full-on Solange"; Mac: "He asked me what women see in [Sonny]." Lucy and Felicia: "Dimples." Felicia: "So I hear"
Funniest moment (unintentional): There's a book called Family Therapy in Obrecht's office
Saddest moment: N/A
Sweetest/cutest moment: N/A
Least believable moment: Everything about the election – it was on Halloween, Maxie wasn't at the Floating Rib, there was an immediate recount
Best instance of continuity: Morgan shot Max
Worst instance of continuity: N/A
Hero of the week: Michael? I guess? I mean, he did save Ava
Most annoying character: Duke
Smartest character: Ava
Dumbest character: Whoever let their kids go trick-or-treating at a mob boss' house

The week in a nutshell:

November 8th, 2014

Next week: Jason meets Sam (YAY!), then goes home with another woman (boo!).

November 10th, 2014

Morgan and Dante try desperately to keep Michael from shooting Sonny, even though Michael doesn't care about the consequences and Sonny's fine with dying. Morgan puts himself between his brother and father, but at this point it seems like Michael would be okay with shooting both of them. Eventually Dante's able to talk Michael down by pointing out that shooting Sonny would make him just like their father, not A.J. Nina tells Ava to call Silas so she can introduce him to his daughter. Ava pretends to, then asks Nina to transfer their family's money back to her control. Nina pulls her own fake-out, then either knocks out or kills her mother with a lamp. "Jake" "meets" his wife and child, and though no one recognizes anyone, there are a lot of meaningful looks between Sam and Jason. However, he accepts Elizabeth's invitation to stay with her while he recovers. Tracy asks Monica to let Ashton stay at the mansion so she and Ned can keep an eye on him in case he's a victim of Jerry's. Patrick meets Ashton and suspects that he's working with Jerry, which is correct. Julian tries again to get Alexis to rekindle their romance, but she's still going to stay away from him until he quits the mob. Kiki and Silas sit around and do nothing while Ava goes nuts.

I expected Jason and Sam's "meeting" to be my favorite GH-related thing today. Then I found out Brandon Barash is coming back. Today was a good day.

I knew Sonny telling Morgan last week not to get between him and the line of fire was foreshadowing.

Nina's swearing like Annie Wilkes, so that's a good sign.

Someday, someone's going to need to explain Danny's continuing desire to hang out with Jason. And I mean in a way I buy.

I fully plan to use "what would Lila do?" in the future. Also, possibly, "be a Quartermaine, not a Corinthos."

November 11th, 2014

Michael's horrible day gets worse when he learns that Kiki and Morgan also kept the secret that Sonny killed A.J. He heads to the Floating Rib to drink away his problems, running into Rosalie. Sonny asks Dante to find the baby, as if the police have ever been able to resolve a kidnapping case. Dante sees the text he received telling him Franco's dead and questions whether his father put out a hit. Sonny realizes that Shawn couldn't have sent the text, since Franco's alive, which means Shawn might be in danger. And he is: Franco tells his captives that he's wired the warehouse to explode if they open the door. Heather would rather die than go back to Ferncliff, so she tries to open it. The others tie her up, deciding that until they can figure out a plan, they need to keep the door closed. They should probably let Dante and Nathan know about their plan, since they're checking out the warehouse. Bobbie blasts (no pun intended) Scott for letting Franco off the hook while planning to bust Carly for her part in Sonny's cover-up. When he's questioned by the press about Carly, Scott opts not to comment. Nathan yells at Rosalie for telling Nina and Madeline where Ava was, since that makes her responsible for the baby's kidnapping. Maxie and Lucas, please be more relevant. You, too, Olivia and Lulu.

While I'm interested in knowing who the baby's father is, I enjoy the whole she's-either-my-daughter-or-my-sister thing. (Also, I'm still rooting for Morgan because I really want Carly to be a grandmother.)

Robin Mattson might be the luckiest person on the show right now. She got to wear comfortable clothes for this whole storyline.

I'm leaning toward there not being a bomb. When did Franco have time to gather the necessary components and put it together? Also, of the six people now at the warehouse, only one is expendable.

I'm 99 percent sure today was the first time we've seen Franco and Maxie together since Roger Howarth took over the role.

November 12th, 2014

Nina imagines Silas showing up at the Rendezvous so they can start their lives with the baby. When she realizes he's not really there, she figures out that Madeline never called him. In fact, Madeline called Obrecht, who mentions Nina's whereabouts to Franco when he stops by to tell her he's leaving town. Obrecht then gives the location to Nathan, but he and Anna don't arrive until after Franco has invited Nina to join him on his getaway boat. Dante and Nathan inadvertently rescue Franco's captives by simply opening the door, which, as expected, wasn't rigged to do anything. Heather's taken to the police station, but Dante just takes Carly home and warns her that Scott wants her arrested. Carly has more than that to worry about, though: Michael's upset, the baby's missing, and her ex-fiancé has left her a goodbye CD letting her know that his revenge is her not knowing when/if he'll come back to town. Michael and Rosalie get drunk together, and she admits that she was going to seduce him so Nina would keep her secret. They wind up kissing, then going back to Michael's place together. Sonny and Duke are in lockup together, like, "Well, that didn't go the way we planned." Morgan and Kiki hang around the PCPD, bugging people and saying nothing new. Shawn and Jordan decide to tell T.J. what they're keeping from him so they can't use the information against each other anymore.

So many people charter boats to leave town, the police should really start keeping an eye on the harbor whenever they're looking for a fugitive.

I'm surprised Obrecht isn't upset that she wasn't invited to the Hallowedding.

Why are all of Obrecht's office supplies white? It's weird.

I think Carly's the first person to get to change clothes in two weeks. And she deserved to be the first, because I'm sure wearing that wedding dress for that long wasn't fun.

Give it up for the comedy stylings of drunk Rosalie Martinez and drunk Michael Corinthos III. Tip your waiter and throw the kids some condoms. Also, was anyone else hoping that they would go up to one of the rooms above the Floating Rib, like Carly and A.J.?

November 13th, 2014

Franco takes Nina and the baby to Canada to hide out in the same place he stayed after Jason shot him. Nina still wants to contact Silas, and Franco realizes how far gone she is. He manages to convince her not to make the call by pointing out that she'll get arrested for attacking Madeline, and the baby won't have her mother. Scott reluctantly gets a warrant for Franco's arrest, then makes Carly join the increasing number of characters in lockup. Madeline tells Nathan that she only helped Nina take the baby because she was being threatened. She reveals that Franco arrived after she was knocked out, and Obrecht pretends not to know how Franco might have found out where Nina was. Once Nathan leaves, the sisters accuse each other of lying. Rosalie feels guilty for telling Madeline where Ava was. Michael practically says that it's not a big deal because Ava's a murderer. Kiki whines to Silas about her relationship with Michael until he tells her to go fight for it. Unsurprisingly, this means she walks in on Michael and Rosalie in bed together. Carly urges Morgan to be there for Michael, not realizing that Michael's done with his entire family. Ava is ready to tear into Madeline for helping Nina, because she's suddenly all maternal and stuff. Lucy hires Alexis to defend Duke, who may be able to avoid doing time if he rolls over on Sonny. Sonny, meanwhile, has no attorney because he fired Alexis, and Diane probably wouldn't take his call if he tried to contact her.

Drink every time someone says "find that baby." Chug every time someone actually does something in an attempt to find the baby.

I'm all for hating Scott, but I don't see how Franco's threats against Carly are his fault.

Priorities, Kiki. Your relationship is, like, the eighth biggest thing Michael's dealing with right now.

Is it just me or does Carly's pocketbook look like it was dipped in blood?

November 14th, 2014

Jason finally leaves the hospital, but not before seeing portraits of Alan, Edward, and Lila. Elizabeth thinks that since he finds them familiar, he might be from the area. At her house, he comes across a picture of himself. Kiki's stunned that Michael slept with Rosalie, and even more stunned that he wants to break up, like, you kept major secrets from him for weeks. Why are you so surprised? Carly and Sonny would probably be making out (or more) right now if they weren't both behind bars. Michael comes to visit, so prepare yourself for a lot of yelling on Monday. Nikolas and Britt get a visit from Special Agent Kyle Sloane from the Department of Justice, which is investigating Victor's off-book activities while he was heading the WSB. Victor had records indicating that Robert and Anna killed Faison, and Sloane wants Britt to help him build a case against Anna. Duke refuses to testify against Sonny. Lucy and Obrecht continue to be annoying.

So let's get this straight. The list of people/names Jason remembers includes: one son, one son's mother, his father, his grandmother, and his grandfather. The list of people/names he doesn't remember includes: his wife, his best friend, his nephew, and anyone named Corinthos. (I can't say where Danny goes because I'm not sure anyone said his name in front of Jason.) I don't like this.

Kudos to the person who had to dig up a picture of Sarah Webber from the '90s.

"Maybe you just want the brother you can't have." BOOM. I like angry Michael. He's even more honest than usual.

Spoiler: Instead of looking into what Anna and Robert did, Sloane should be looking into what they DIDN'T do. Also, let's hope he knows about certain medical experiments Victor was conducting.

Arrested: Sonny Corinthos, Carly Jacks, Madeline Reeves, Heather Webber
Broke up: Michael Corinthos and Kiki Jerome
Hospitalized: Ava Jerome, Madeline Reeves

Week in review:
Funniest moments (intentional): Franco: "Go big or go home. Or get blown up and don't go home at all"; Scott gesturing for Sonny to smile in his mugshots
Funniest moment (unintentional): Donna Mills' oh-crap-I'm-about-to-be-hit-by-a-lamp face
Saddest moment: Ava being upset about the baby's kidnapping would go here if I gave a crap about Ava
Sweetest/cutest moment: Jason finding the Quartermaines familiar
Least believable moment: N/A
Best instance of continuity: Franco likes explosives
Worst instance of continuity: N/A
Heroes of the week: Dante and Nathan
Most annoying character: It's a tie between Lucy and Kiki
Smartest character: Madeline, for figuring out how to protect herself legally
Dumbest character: Kiki, who STILL thinks her "but Franco was innocent, so it's okay that I defended him" argument means anything
Inside joke: Ashton thinking Patrick was Jason might have been one, since Patrick is played by an actor named Jason

The week in a nutshell:

November 17th, 2014

Michael reluctantly visits his parents to enlist them in helping him clear A.J. of Connie's murder. Sonny agrees to let him have the recording so he can pin the murder on Ava, even if Sonny's incriminated in the process. Michael then goes to the Quartermaines and tells them he's going to be using their last name from now on. Jason meets Patrick, and the two of them, Sam, and Elizabeth bond by trashing Obrecht. There are also more long looks between Sam and Jason. In other news, Jason is good with kids, as evidenced by his rapport with Cameron. Anna threatens to arrest Obrecht for aiding and abetting Nina and Madeline, adding that she still wants to bust Obrecht for killing Victor. Obrecht urges her to confess to killing Faison. Anna mocks her by pretending she's been Faison all along, then saying that Obrecht will never find him. Britt declines to help Sloane, telling him that Anna did everyone a favor if she killed Faison. But after Sloane leaves, she admits that she wants to know what happened, and kind of feels sorry for her father. Ashton, who has attracted Alice's suspicions, tells Ned and Tracy that they need to regain the shareholders' trust by overthrowing Michael and replacing him with Tracy. Cameron informs Spencer that his beloved uncle is in jail. Spencer ungraciously tells Josslyn that her motherís there, too.

I thought there was nothing on the recording about Sonny killing A.J. I need Spinelli to come back and clarify things for me. And also to bring Lil' Georgie for a visit. And also to meet "Jake."

Can someone PLEASE tell Michael that Jerry has shares in ELQ? He should have been told weeks ago.

Patrick to Jason: "Nice to meet you." Me: (giggling uncontrollably)

Poor Cam. "This stranger will be living with us for a while. He has amnesia and the same name as your dead brother. I hope you're okay with that."

November 18th, 2014

Diane tries to get Sonny to retract his promise to get the recording to Michael, since she can use it to get him a deal. Sonny refuses, even knowing he's sealing his own fate. Later, Alexis tells him that Duke is on his way to Pentonville, and Carly will probably follow. Michael asks to move into the Quartermaines' on what happens to be A.J.'s birthday. Then he vows to keep Tracy out of ELQ, warning that Ashton is probably scamming her. Also, for some reason Michael thinks it's a good idea to play the recording for Monica, though at least he gets to point out that A.J. is officially off the hook for Connie's murder. Kiki confronts Ava for killing Connie, rejecting all of her apologies and excuses. She warns that Michael will want to see her brought to justice, and that the existence of the recording is now common knowledge. Michael takes the recording to Anna, but when Anna goes to arrest Ava, she's disappeared. Obrecht forces Britt to cooperate with Sloane by threatening to tell Nikolas what she knew about Spencer's "disappearance." Sam and Patrick spy on Ashton and overhear him calling Jerry. Anna runs into Sloane, who happens to be her former protégé, and he's all gloaty and smug, which means I'm going to laugh extra-hard when he finds out what really happened to Faison. Spencer has an attack of conscience and almost tells Nikolas that Britt was in on his "disappearance." Patrick gets his job back, so that dumb storyline is finally over. Jordan prepares for the big conversation she and Shawn want to have with T.J. about his father.

Michael, you should watch how much you throw around "drunk" as an insult, considering who your father was.

I'm not sure the chain of custody on the recording wil stand up in court: A.J. to Carly/Franco/Spinelli to Sonny to Shawn to Michael to Anna. It passed through a lot of criminals.

With Sonny in prison and Ava either in prison or on the run, I guess Kiki and Morgan will be taking care of the baby when she's returned?

Am I supposed to feel bad for Britt? Because...never gonna happen.

November 19th, 2014

After Carly is denied bail, Sonny makes a deal with Scott: He'll drop the charges against Carly in exchange for a guilty plea from Sonny. Michael accuses Kiki and Morgan of helping Ava leave the hospital. In reality, Ava has gone to Silas for sanctuary, though she only tells him she's hiding from Sonny, not the police. Morgan thinks that Michael will eventually calm down and take Kiki back, but she's not sure, since he slept with Rosalie. T.J. is stunned to learn that Shawn killed Thomas in self-defense after Thomas attacked him, having learned that Shawn and Jordan had an affair. T.J. quickly does the math and asks if there's a possibility that Shawn is his biological father. Shawn and Jordan tell him that the paternity test she took said Thomas was his father, but Jordan sure looks like she's keeping a secret. While Sam and Patrick listen in, Ashton makes arrangements to receive something from Jerry in a safe deposit box. Patrick distracts Ashton (badly) while Sam uses silly putty to make a mold of Ashton's safe deposit box key. Anna thinks Julian helped Ava escape and takes him to lockup. Bobbie's so angry with Scott that she slaps him in front of a bunch of photographers, then dumps him.

It's adorable that people think Ava needed help to escape. It's adorable that people think she needs help doing anything.

Wow, Silas is really a sucker for a damsel in distress.

Hold up. Shawn blacked out and was told later that Thomas was dead? Yeah, that dude's still alive. I'm, like, 95 percent sure.

Patrick, don't quit your recently recovered day job. You suck as a spy.

Is it wrong of me to hope that the safe deposit box is empty except for a note that says, "Eavesdropping is rude" or "I'm not working with Jerry, you prats"?

November 20th, 2014

Obrecht and Sloane gleefully tell Anna that the DOJ is bringing a case against her for killing Faison. Britt gives Nikolas the same information, but much less gleefully. It's a moot point anyway, as Anna announces that Faison is alive. Franco manages to get Nina to realize that she's confused – the baby's not hers, and her marriage to Silas is over. Still unaware of Ava's crimes, Silas suggests that they hire Sam to find the baby. Ava convinces him to go off with her to look for the baby on their own. Sam and Patrick ask Lulu to keep Ashton at the Quartermaines' while they break into his safe deposit box. There's no need, since Ned has already given him something to do, namely have breakfast with him, Alexis, and Tracy. Ashton learns the story of Dobson and is happy to realize that the Quartermaines are easily duped. Olivia confronts Julian for Ava's actions, and though he promises he didn't know that she killed Connie, he admits that he did know that she shot Olivia. Julian does have a supporter in Lucas, who also advises him to tell Alexis everything she wants to know so he can win her back.

I'm starting to love everything Anna does. Her shutting down Obrecht and Sloane is like an early Christmas present.

I hope Silas can't be arrested for aiding and abetting if he didn't know he was running off with a criminal. I don't think there are any holding cells left at the PCPD anyway.

From things I've read about the next couple of weeks, Julian might actually spill the truth this time.

Now that it's a new day and the picture on the front page of the paper has changed, I'm disappointed that they missed the chance to have Jason see Sonny's picture.

A BLT omelet? You've gone too far, Shawn.

November 21st, 2014

Anna reveals that instead of killing or imprisoning Faison, she and Robert simply left him where he was: They stuck him in a hole under the stables, where he's been captive ever since. She takes Obrecht and Sloane to the hole, but it's empty. At Miscavige, Luke plots his escape while trying to remember what Fluke said to him. Maybe he can ask him to say it again, since they run into each other while Luke's trying to leave. Sam and Patrick pose as a married couple wanting a safe deposit box in order to get access to Ashton's. They're unable to crack a second box before Ashton arrives, but when they return later, they find a flash drive and a picture of Faison. By the end of the episode, Alexis has more answers than anyone, as Julian has told her that Luke is being impersonated. Lulu tells Tracy what Sam and Patrick have learned about Ashton. Tracy thinks Luke is still an innocent party, but she also doesn't think Ashton is capable of working with Jerry. Spencer takes Emma out of school to hang out at the stables, where he tells her he first learned she was in danger. Nikolas can't figure out who's being such a bad influence on his kid.

I joked to my mom the other day that it would be funny if Faison were still trapped at Wyndemere. Joke's on me!

Please tell me we're not supposed to believe that Fluke is Faison. That would make the inappropriate remarks he made about Britt even more inappropriate.

I was surprised to see Tony Geary so soon. He only went back to the set two weeks ago. I'm so glad they're moving this storyline along.

Broke up: Scott Baldwin and Bobbie Spencer

Week in review:
Funniest moments (intentional): Tracy: (looking for a word for someone who rages) Ned: "Maniac." Monica: (swearing) Ned: "Monica?" Tracy: "Ooh, they both work"; Sam objecting to Patrick trying to rush her through picking a lock because no one rushes him when he's performing brain surgery
Funniest moment (unintentional): Ashton using air quotes while on the phone
Saddest moment: T.J. learning the truth about Thomas' death
Sweetest/cutest moment: T.J. worrying about Jordan
Least believable moment: Faison's been on Spoon Island for the past year and no one knew
Best instance of continuity: Dobson, the former Quartermaine butler, who was actually Alexis in drag
Worst instance of continuity: N/A
Hero of the week: Sonny, I guess
Most annoying character: Obrecht
Smartest characters: T.J., who can do math; Sam, for ingenious use of silly putty
Dumbest character: N/A
Unanswered question of the week: Is Thomas really dead?
Best/most memorable moment of the week: Anna telling Obrecht that she's been Faison all along

The week in a nutshell:

November 24th, 2014

Luke guesses that Fluke is Ashton, which makes slightly more sense than Faison but still seems strange. Anna admits that she hasn't actually seen Faison since she and Robert put him in the hole, and that Robert had a WSB agent get a job as a stable hand to keep an eye on him. Unfortunately, the stable hand lost track of Faison and submitted false reports for a year. Sam and Patrick take the flash drive to the Quartermaines, and Tracy and Lulu join them to look through its contents, which are all about Faison. Along with pictures and specs of his Duke mask, there are specs for what looks like a mask of Luke's face. Alexis is skeptical of Julian's story that he was approached by a Luke lookalike who wanted help taking over Port Charles. Then she forgets all about that when Julian admits that Ric was completely innocent, and Julian sacrificed him to protect the rest of his family. He promises to take Alexis to the real Luke if she gets him out of lockup. T.J. turns to Molly for comfort over Jordan and Shawn's news, and she assures him that the way his father died doesn't reflect on the person he was. Then she encourages him to spend time with Shawn and work things out. Jordan's boss urges her to find another way to the Jerome capo so Ric can leave witness protection.

So we're down to two suspects for Fluke, it seems, but I'm not sure I can buy him being either Faison or Ashton. Why would Ashton want to take over Port Charles? What does he have against Sonny? I thought Fluke had a personal vendetta. As for Faison, Fluke just doesn't talk like him. I don't mean his accent; I mean his word choices. Things like references to T. rexes and Mission Impossible. But if I had to go for one over the other, I'd go with Ashton.

Hey, Faison, if you're going to wander around town, try a disguise. A lot of people want you dead.

WSB stable hand, YOU HAD ONE JOB.

"Scandinavian garden gnome" – ouch. Poor Anders Hove.

Did Jordan seriously ask why the DEA is so keen to move the investigation along? Uh, how about because they don't want drugs in town?

November 25th, 2014

Alexis gets Julian out of lockup, and he takes her to Miscavige to see Luke. Helena's already there, having a little fun with the re-drugged Luke. He's at least coherent enough to realize that she's working with Fluke, but she doesn't provide any other information. Jason has a nightmare about someone messing with him, but doesn't remember it when he wakes up. Elizabeth dresses him up for Thanksgiving, and he doesn't like semi-nice clothes, so he's definitely Jason. Later, Helena pays a surprise visit. Sam's Thanksgiving plans get cancelled, so Patrick invites her to tag along with him to Elizabeth's. She's not sure about the company, but he points out that they can entertain themselves by investigating "Jake." Carly tries to reach out to Michael, who tells her he's changing his name to Quartermaine. Carly reminds him that Jason, not Michael, gave him his name, but since it was in honor of a mobster, Michael won't listen. Sonny's deal covers Duke, so he's out of prison, too. He agrees to run the organization until Sonny gets released, if he ever does. Sloane warns Anna that she'll pay for what she and Robert did to Faison.

Helena continues to baffle me. Why isn't she hiding out, pretending to be dead? Why is she at Elizabeth's? She didn't look like she knew Jason would be there. Wouldn't she be more likely to go to Wyndemere?

Something I realized that hasn't come up: Jason has a two-year gap from when he was frozen. It would be interesting if that came out and added a new wrinkle to his situation.

Did I miss something? Did Elizabeth wish Jason a happy birthday? What was that about?

What are the odds that we'll see Audrey or Aiden at Elizabeth's for Thanksgiving?

Carlos is getting out of prison, too, right?

November 26th, 2014

Alexis frees Luke from Miscavige, sending Julian away so Luke won't attack him for being in on the whole scheme. The two of them then crash the Quartermaines' Thanksgiving, where the pizza (in place of a possibly tainted meal) and singing traditions have already been carried out. Jason finds Helena familiar, but she keeps her identity secret. Whatever she was planning to do over there, she's unable to accomplish it, since she has to flee before anyone else can see her. Elizabeth isn't even sure she was really there, since Jason didn't get her name and Elizabeth doesn't know who would have visited. Helena returns later to spy on everyone during dinner. Not that Sonny was going to have a great Thanksgiving anyway, but Carly makes it worse by telling him that Michael moved in with the Quartermaines and is changing his name. Sonny's upset that he no longer has any ties to his favorite child. Duke's not happy with Anna for lying to everyone about Faison, but he can forgive her if she can forgive him. Anna tries to get him to see that her crime isn't the same as his, and she doesn't want to be with him anymore. Faison lurks around Wyndemere, almost revealing himself before Helena stops him and tries to refocus him on his mission. Later, he lets Obrecht know he's there. Sam takes Danny to see the Quartermaines so we can be reminded that Michael has ties to her. (Really, what was the point? We didn't even get to see Danny with Monica.)

Man, I love a happy ending.

Is it just me or was Sam jealous of the attention Jason was giving Elizabeth? By the way, I wouldn't be surprised if Jason thought Sam and Patrick were married. They totally act like it, this is the second time they've come to the house together, and they're parental with each other's kids.

I love that they cut to Sonny at "the wicked oppressing now cease from distressing."

Shut up, Duke. Go eat turkey with Lucy.

Back in town: Helena Cassadine
Broke up: Scott Baldwin and Bobbie Spencer

Week in review:
Funniest moments (intentional): Olivia pretending to be sorry that Alexis wouldn't be at the Quartermaines'; Tracy being jealous that Rocco was allowed in the kitchen
Funniest moment (unintentional): The idea of Sam and Elizabeth voluntarily spending time together
Saddest moment: T.J. breaking down in tears with Molly
Sweetest/cutest moment: Alexis' concern for Luke
Least believable moment: Helena didn't try to keep Alexis from finding Luke, and she didn't seem to worry that Elizabeth would answer her own door
Best instance of continuity: Luke hallucinated Helena when he was poisoned
Worst instance of continuity: I'm not sure Carly's memories of Michael's first years are entirely accurate
Hero of the week: Alexis
Most annoying character: Duke, who calls Anna a hypocrite while being one himself
Smartest character: Alexis, I guess
Dumbest character: the WSB agent/fake stable hand who didn't think it was necessary to tell Robert and Anna that a killer had escaped his confines and could have been hanging out anywhere he wanted FOR A YEAR
Best/most memorable moment of the week: the triumphant return of Luke

The week in a nutshell:

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