General Hospital blog - October, 2009

October 1st, 2009

Claudia drops hints to Dante and Olivia, leading Olivia to tell Kate that she thinks Claudia does know at least one of her secrets. Alexis is reluctant to let Kristina spend more time with Sonny, what with him being a mobster and everything. Molly doesn't help to alleviate her fears when she comes to Sonny for an interview for a school project about being a criminal. Alexis asks Carly to help her form a united front, but Carly thinks their kids should spend as much time with their father as possible. Sam catches Kristina and Kiefer alone in Kristina's room and lectures her sister about safe sex. Later, the teens meet up at the Metro Court, where Kiefer gets angry when Kristina keeps rebuffing him. Michael confronts Claudia about her admission of guilt while he was comatose. Someone releases Luke from his cell and he comes across an ailing Helena, who warns him that someone wants revenge on both of their families. Before he can get details, he's knocked out. Sonny accuses Johnny of leaking information to the cops, though Jason thinks they can still trust him.

Apparently James Franco is doing this as research for a role. He's acting on a soap to research for an acting job? How odd. We should start taking bets on who he'll play. I'm going to guess...mobster.

I swear there's a statue or bookend shaped like a horse's head in Sonny's new office. Go look! I'm not joking!

If they kill off Helena, I will so go all Kiefer on the writers.

Two MOTEs today. The first goes to Megan Warn (Kate) for admitting to Olivia that if they killed Claudia, "People might notice." The second goes to Laura Wright (Carly) for the way she responded to Alexis' statement that Sonny's a criminal.

October 2nd, 2009

Claudia finally uses her knowledge of Dante's paternity to blackmail Olivia. She also tries to make Michael think that Jason planted the idea of her involvement in his shooting, which leads Michael to ask Jason why Claudia would say something like that. Jason still won't tell him anything. Michael announces that he doesn't want anyone to be punished for his shooting. Sonny tells Dante to find the leak in the organization, and Ronnie encourages him to give up a guy named Tommy Soto who they were never able to nab. Dante decides to take Ronnie's advice, but his next task is to eliminate Tommy. Kristina is smack dab in the middle of an abusive relationship and doesn't get it. She does ask Sam to take her to get birth control, so at least she's making some good decisions. Nikolas and Elizabeth make plans to meet and talk about their situation, but a run-in with Lucky leaves Elizabeth feeling guilty and leads her to call it off. Sonny tells Claudia that he thinks they should wait a little while before trying for another baby, so she tries to guilt him into changing his mind. Sam and Jason decide to make their new relationship even better than their original one.

I can't believe it took Claudia this long to try to blackmail Olivia. I feel like I would be better at blackmail than Claudia and I've never even tried it. Once again, for a villain, she's not very villainous.

Dante, all you have to do is get Tommy to turn on Sonny and put him in witness protection. Or kill two birds with one stone and make him believe Claudia's the leak.

The only thing Kiefer could do to make himself look more like a classic abusive boyfriend is to bring Kristina flowers to apologize.

No one's going to mention Rebecca's darker hair? Was I the only one who noticed?

October 3rd, 2009

Next week: Jason should just join McCall & Jackal, Nikolas is a hero, and this Claudia/Olivia battle is going to be epic.

October 5th, 2009

Claudia threatens to tell Sonny and Dante about Olivia's secrets – all of them, since she's figured out that Dante's hiding something with regards to his job – if Olivia doesn't break up with Johnny. Olivia attempts to thwart her by noting that if she's single, Sonny will approach her again. Claudia doesn't buy it and Olivia won't play her trump card, so her only option is to dump Johnny. Dante resists Sonny's orders to kill Tommy, but when Johnny agrees to do it, Dante changes his mind and agrees to handle it himself. Sonny asks Jason to keep an eye on him and make sure everything goes right. As Jason heads towards them, Dante tells Tommy that he's a cop and Tommy can only save himself by turning state's evidence. Lulu and Ethan manage to briefly infiltrate the Cassadine compound in Greece before being chased away by men with guns. Later they run into Mischa, who tells them she's Helena's nurse and Luke is being held prisoner by another Cassadine. Nikolas confides his Elizabeth issues to Robin, who tells him he needs to end things before anyone gets hurt. Nikolas tries to figure out where Elizabeth is, but she's left town suddenly (and Lucky doesn't see anything strange about that). Spencer draws a picture on her dear John letter to Nikolas, then shows the picture to Lucky. Jax enlists Michael, Morgan, Kristina, and Molly to help him and Carly pick out a name for the baby. She has a dream about their daughter as a teenager and somehow it leads her to decide on a name. Sonny tells Claudia that he doesn't want another child. Jason and Sam wonder if they might be able to find a connection between Ian and Claudia.

Well, Olivia, if you're not willing to throw Claudia's involvement in Michael's shooting in her face, then you're on your own. Enjoy being single.

Holy cow, Dante did what I said he should! The writers aren't as crazy as I thought! Wait, no, I don't mean that.

Please tell me Jason and Sam will be digging up Ian's body. That would rock.

I'm interested to know why Mischa has a Russian first name (a Russian boys' name, at that), a Greek last name, and an English accent.

I still think Carly and Jax should name the baby Caroline, Carly's birth name, but no, they're going to go for the stupid J-name tradition. Though I guess we should be glad they're not continuing Carly's M-name tradition.

Hey, look, it's Spencer! And he's almost instrumental to a plot!

October 6th, 2009

Johnny refuses to believe that Olivia wants to break up with him because she's in love with Sonny, but she sticks to her story and goes through with the breakup. She reminds Jax that she has dangerous information on Claudia and could easily go to Jason and let him take care of things. Claudia reluctantly accepts Sonny's decision not to have a baby, then gets to work trying to find out if she's already pregnant. She's not, so she tries to seduce Dante. Fortunately, Johnny interrupts and demands to know if Claudia had something to do with his dumping. It takes a while, but Dante convinces Tommy that he'll be killed if he doesn't turn state's evidence. By the time Jason arrives, Tommy's gone and Dante's pretending that he got away. Sonny fires Dante for being bad at his job, but Jason stands up for him and reminds Sonny that an assassination is different from killing someone in a battle. Michael remembers Claudia's apology again, and Carly notices his strange behavior and asks Kristina about it. Michael gets angry about them talking about him behind his back and starts throwing things. While Mischa tells Lulu and Ethan that Luke might not be alive, Helena tells Luke that the Spencers and Cassadines are in danger from a guy named Valentin, another of Mikkos' long-lost illegitimate children. Sonny asks Jason to be nice to Claudia, which, of course, Jason is totally in favor of doing. Carly wants to name the baby Josslyn John Jacks. Nikolas hints to Lucky that he's not such a nice guy.

Ew, Claudia. Just when I thought she couldn't get any worse.

I find it funny that Jax doesn't think Olivia could handle being responsible for someone's death when he's previously told Jason it's okay for him to kill Jerry. Shut up and let her talk, Jax!

If Carly's going to give the baby the initials J.J.J., then they should at least call her J.J. And I'll give her Josslyn, since it's an actual name (though I'd prefer the spelling Jocelyn), but I don't get how she came up with that after her dream yesterday.

Congratulations, Alexis – you have another crazy brother. What does this make now, three?

Again with the weird editing – Nikolas and Lucky disappear halfway through the episode and we switch over to Greece. I'm still confused.

October 7th, 2009

Carly manages to get Michael to calm down, but his rage returns when Kiefer shows up to take Kristina and Molly home. Carly demands that Michael tell her everything he's dealing with, but Jax backs him up in his desire to remain secretive. Alexis forbids Kristina from spending any time with Michael until his behavior improves. Johnny blasts Claudia for causing his breakup and threatens to reveal her role in Michael's shooting in retaliation. Claudia still won't budge, so Johnny tries again to get Olivia to tell him what's really going on. He's 0 for 2. Dante tells Ronnie that Claudia hit on him, and Ronnie decides this is the last straw in Dante's too-deep involvement with the organization, so he needs to make a big move by wearing a wire. Mischa sneaks Lulu and Ethan into the Cassadine compound, where they free Luke. Helena begs to be rescued as well, and Luke thinks it's a good idea, for some reason. They're stopped by guards as they try to leave, but Nikolas shows up and saves everyone. Helena warns him about Valentin and how evil he is, admitting that she doesn't know where he is. Luke seems to think Mischa's on the level, but Ethan and Lulu may be suspicious of her. Jason and Sam enlist Spinelli to help them find out what Ian had on him when he died. They discover the existence of a mini-recorder and make plans to get into the warehouse where it's being kept.

So how long until Alexis realizes she's forbidding Kristina from hanging out with the wrong person?

I can't believe I have to say this, but thank you, Dante, for thwarting your stepmother's plans to sleep with you.

How does Spinelli not get smacked over the head more often?

What kind of crazy-fast jet does Nikolas have that allowed him to fly from New York to Greece in, like, two hours? It did allow for the best scene of the episode, though, with Luke pulling a "hey, there he is!" on the guards, then Ethan saying the same thing, Luke thinking he was practicing, and the revelation that Nikolas actually was there. I have to admit, I laughed pretty hard at that.

October 8th, 2009

Dante wears his wire but only spends a couple of minutes with Sonny, who still doesn't trust him, so it doesn't pay off. Claudia summons him to her booked-under-an-alias room at the Metro Court and offers him info on the organization in exchange for sex. Dante mostly tries to resist because he'll be busted if she takes off his shirt, and hopefully also because he has ethics. Olivia tells Carly that she broke up with Johnny because of Claudia, which Carly doesn't get. Johnny tells Sonny about the breakup, leading Sonny to suspect that he had something to do with it. Alexis tells Michael that she doesn't want him hanging around Kristina and Molly until he can control his anger. Carly overhears and blasts Alexis for being an overbearing parent. Sam takes Kristina to get birth control and tells her about her own experiences. She wants Kristina to wait on sex until she's older, but Kristina is adamant about giving Kiefer what he wants. Louise and Patrick have a mutual friend (her best friend is his ex) and reminisce about college experiences. They wind up going to Jake's together for karaoke night, which seems to make Robin nervous.

Dante, remember your ethics! You have some, right?

I actually hope that Kristina talking about what she would do if she got pregnant was foreshadowing. I've wanted the show to do a teen-pregnancy storyline for a long time; the closest they came was with Lulu, but she was already 18 and had an abortion, so that storyline didn't last very long. I can foresee Kristina telling Kiefer to use a condom because her birth control hasn't kicked in yet (PSA: they should be using one even with the birth control, of course) and him not doing it know, he's That Guy.

Obviously the solution here is to put Matt and Louise together. Well, it's obvious to me, at least.

I wonder exactly how much time passed between Sonny finding out about Olivia and Johnny's breakup and his arrival at the Metro Court. I'd say less than 15 minutes.

October 9th, 2009

Claudia tells Dante that she knows his true identity, but he's relieved to learn that she doesn't know he's a cop, she just thinks he works for a rival organization. She threatens to out him to Sonny if he doesn't sleep with her. Before Dante has to decide what to do, Ronnie sends cops to arrest "Dominic" and get him out of the hotel. Ronnie informs Dante that he's off the case, but Dante refuses to leave, even offering to resign and stay behind as a private citizen to continue trying to bust Sonny. Later, Sonny and Carly catch Claudia coming into the hotel lobby, obviously finishing getting dressed. Johnny and Olivia wallow at Jake's, where Chikezie Eze sings Phil Collins and makes Simon Cowell jokes. Johnny sings "Try a Little Tenderness" to Olivia, who has to run out before she does something Claudia will make her regret. Jason and Sam break into the police warehouse, where Lucky catches Sam. Alexis wants Kristina to come to her with her problems and stop seeing Sam as a role model. Maxie encourages Robin to spice up her and Patrick's love life, buying them a bunch of stuff that will help with some sort of sci-fi/laser-tag role-playing. It comes back to bite Robin when Patrick brings Louise home with him. Carly tells Sonny to stand up for Michael and Morgan so they can hang out with Kristina.

So Claudia rode all the way down to the lobby while still not completely dressed? Idiot.

I kind of love how Alexis basically said, "Sam is awesome, but she sucks as a role model." Kristina, it's less about her not going to Yale or being a lawyer and more about her shacking up with a mobster.

Ah ha, I wondered why Lucky showed up for one scene and then disappeared for the rest of the episode. Nice one, writers.

Why did Jason take a gun with him to the police warehouse? I think shooting a cop would be something he would want to avoid.

I hate to say this, because I generally liked Chikezie on American Idol, but...yeah, there's a reason he came in tenth. Brandon Barash actually sounded better.

October 10th, 2009

Next week: Jason and Dante are both on Claudia's trail, Kristina continues to be dumb, and Helena causes trouble for Elizabeth. I love you, Helena.

October 12th, 2009

Claudia tells Sonny and Carly that she wanted to get a room at the hotel for Johnny, which Sonny buys. Sonny calls Michael over to talk to him about his rage issues, telling him that they have something in common since Sonny's bipolar disorder makes him feel a lot like Michael does. Claudia eavesdrops and learns that Michael is resisting the memories he's having. She heads to Dante's room (where he appears to be packing to go back to Bensonhurst, having been pulled from Sonny's case) and tells him they're going to have to pick up their interrupted liaison the next night. Sam manages to convince Lucky that she's not in the police warehouse for nefarious purposes, and though he agrees not to arrest her, he makes her leave, though not before mentioning that he and Elizabeth are getting remarried. An unnoticed Jason is able to remain behind and find the box containing evidence in Ian's case, but there's no tape in the recorder. Sam and Jason meet back up at her apartment, where he tells her that he's more interested in her than what Elizabeth is doing. Things turn from business to pleasure, but Molly interrupts their attempt at romance. Dante tells Lulu about a mobster killing the man who was like a father to him, and she believes he's joined the mob to avenge his death. Johnny confronts Olivia, who maintains that she can't be with him. Carly tries to comfort Johnny, then has a contraction. Robin, Patrick, and Louise manage to laugh off their embarrassing encounter, and later Patrick makes it clear to Robin that their relationship doesn't need any spicing up.

I really want to start a countdown to Claudia's last day, because I'm so beyond ready for her to be gone. Counting weekends, it's 24. Come faster, November 5th!

Did Sam seriously tell Lucky that she and Jason aren't together? Honey, everyone's seen the two of you all over each other. Why would you even lie about that? Also, I hope she and Jason took out those earpieces connecting them to Spinelli so he doesn't have to listen to whatever happens next.

I don't get the point of the Robin/Patrick/Louise stuff, other than to let us see more of Louise, but Robin and Patrick got to be adorable again, so I guess I shouldn't complain.

How much do I love that Carly gets fries from Coleman through drug-deal-like actions? That's so her. However, it's not too early for the baby – she can't be more than a month early, and on this show, premature babies are always fine.

October 13th, 2009

Olivia happily tells Jax that Dante's being sent back to Brooklyn, but Jax is upset that the best chance to bring down Sonny has fallen through. He places a call to a senator, most likely to get Dante's reassignment overturned. Sonny advises Dante to never marry or have kids if he wants to be a high-ranking mobster. When he adds that he told Claudia they won't be having any children, Dante figures out why Claudia's been so eager to get him into bed. Jason and Sam come up with the plan to make Claudia believe Ian recorded all of his conversations, then see if she tries to find the recordings, in the hope that she'll incriminate herself. Johnny and Coleman attempt to help a laboring Carly, who refuses to let the baby be born six weeks early, even when Kelly says there's little danger. Sam chastises Molly for letting herself into the apartment, spying on her and Jason, and being nosy about their relationship. When Molly goes home, she tells Alexis that she caught Sam and Jason together, which leads Alexis to question Sam's choices. Luke and Ethan return to the Haunted Star to find that Tracy has replaced them with doppelgangers. Kristina tells Kiefer that they can't have sex for a month until her birth control kicks in. He doesn't want to wait that long, surprisingly enough.

I love that Dante is smart enough to figure out what Claudia's up to just from a simple conversation with Sonny. Rock on, Dante.

Also rock on, Jason and Sam, for the idea to make Claudia incriminate herself by telling her Ian recorded all of his conversations. Her takedown is going to be so sweet.

I would think Kelly would want to deliver the baby sooner rather than later, since that will make Carly's clotting condition go away. Maybe someone should explain that to Carly?

Today's MOTE definitely goes to Brandon Barash (Johnny) for remembering that Johnny's drunk and for the facial expressions he made when Carly was squeezing his hand. He cracked me up through the whole episode.

October 14th, 2009

Alexis thinks it's okay for Kristina and Molly to look up to Sam, just not too much, and that Sam's a bad example for having a relationship with a killer, though Alexis is spotless for having relationships with Sonny and Jerry. She also wants Kristina and Molly to come to her with their problems rather than go to Sam, like Sam has any control over that. Kristina has sex with Kiefer and immediately regrets it, telling Michael that she's worried Alexis will find out she's not perfect. Dante lets Olivia know that he's not going to accept his reassignment without a fight. Later he confides in Lulu about Claudia's advances. Carly's labor stops but she's told for the millionth time that she needs to avoid stress. Jason convinces Claudia that Ian recorded their conversations, so she starts searching for any motel he may have stayed in. Carly's situation makes Johnny feel sympathy for Claudia's miscarriage, leading them to make up. Their ceasefire doesn't last long as they quickly start fighting about Olivia again.

I hate taking someone's side against Alexis, but it has to be done. If she has a problem with Kristina and Molly spending time with Sam, she needs to tell Kristina and Molly, especially since Sam didn't ask Molly to come over and catch her with Jason. Also, if Molly thinks Sam and Jason were having sex when they were actually fully clothed, then yes, Alexis, you need to have the sex talk with her, ten years old or not. (Personally, I don't think ten is that young for the sex talk, especially with how precocious Molly is.)

I guess Johnny has to like Claudia again so someone will actually be sad when she dies. (Um, spoiler?)

Sorry, secret keepers, no baby yet. You have to hold your secrets in a little longer.

I used to hate Coleman (mostly because of the whole making-Courtney-strip thing, and I hated Courtney, too, so that says a lot), but now I wouldn't mind if he became a regular character. He and Kate could have an illicit affair and everything.

October 15th, 2009

Dante gets reassigned to Sonny's case, which makes Olivia furious. She figures out that Jax was behind the change in orders and lays into him. Of course, Carly overhears and wonders what's going on. Zacchara asks some guy named Joey Limbo, who's about to be released from prison, to take out Sonny, Claudia, and Dante. Dante warns Sonny about Limbo's parole, and Sonny, not wanting to start a mob war while Carly's health is tenuous, decides to make a preemptive strike, asking Dante in so many words to kill Limbo. Lucky and Elizabeth are shocked that Nikolas has brought Helena in from Greece and wants her treated at General Hospital. Rebecca thinks Helena's bark is worse than her bite, because she's an idiot and won't listen when five different people say that Helena's dangerous. Helena lets Elizabeth know that she's on to her and Nikolas' relationship (or whatever it is). Jason and Sam go to the motel where Ian stayed, initially intending to break into his room until Sam points out that it's better to pay for the room than risk getting busted for breaking and entering. A hooker spots Jason giving her money and approaches him for the same arrangements, thinking he just paid Sam for sex. They send her away, but while they're searching the room, she comes back, this time with a badge – she's a cop and she's arresting them for solicitation. Alexis tells Luke that she's heard stories about Valentin but always suspected the acts he supposedly committed were actually Helena's doings. Ethan tells Luke the real reason he came to town, but Luke only cares that Ethan was trying to steal from the Quartermaines, since they're his target.

Yeah, I'm sure Jax is going to tell Carly everything. We're not idiots, writers!

I'm also sure this random guy we've never heard of is going to be able to kill Sonny by himself, after so many people have failed. Writers, please stop insulting my intelligence.

Ha, I love Jason and Sam getting arrested for solicitation. The only way it could be funnier is if Claudia were there, know...her clothes.

I must ask, what purpose does Rebecca serve anymore? Can we get rid of her? Hey, Joey Limbo, she works for Sonny! Really, I swear!

October 16th, 2009

Johnny tells Olivia that he knows Claudia forced her to break up with him, and he thinks they should work together to bring her down, since he knows secrets she doesn't want revealed. Claudia catches them kissing and informs Olivia that she's about to sleep with her son. At the end of her rope, Olivia goes to Sonny and, as Michael eavesdrops, prepares to tell him...something. Lulu's relieved to hear that Dante doesn't plan to have a child with Claudia. Dante tells Claudia the same and she warns that Sonny will hurt Olivia when he finds out she's been lying to him. Sonny tells Johnny about Joey Limbo's parole and asks him to keep an eye on Dante and make sure he follows through on Sonny's orders. Johnny fills Jason in, adding that Sonny wants him to drop whatever he's working on and focus on Limbo instead. Jason and Sam are dragged downtown, where no one will listen to their denials of solicitation. Eventually they get bailed out (apparently) and head back to the motel, where Jason finds an address written on a page from Ian's prescription pad. Helena taunts Elizabeth, threatening to tell Luke and Lucky about her and Nikolas. As Elizabeth tells Nikolas what's going on, Lucky comes to see Helena. Diane asks Alexis to join her law firm, but Alexis protesteth too much that she doesn't want to be involved in mob dealings. Diane also refuses to contact Max, who she hasn't talked to since the day of the carnival.

So many questions. Does Claudia think Sonny would kill Olivia for lying about Dante? (She knows this is the same thing that happened with Alexis and Kristina, right?) Does Helena think Lucky will believe anything she says? How did Jason and Sam get out of jail? Why was Diane on today if no one was going to tell her about Jason and Sam's legal trouble? Why would Mac think that Jason was paying his ex-girlfriend for sex? Why didn't Sam just say she's a PI and Jason's helping her with a case? Do the writers really expect us to believe that Olivia's actually going to tell Sonny anything? Why does it matter if Michael's eavesdropping? Why doesn't Olivia use her trump card against Claudia? And though I know it's not going to happen, wouldn't it be funny if Claudia did get pregnant, they did a DNA test, and the results revealed not only the baby's paternity but Dante's?

Also, what's up with Diane's hair?

October 17th, 2009

Next week: Claudia really better watch her back, Johnny and Olivia are far from over, and Jason and Sam awesomely team up with Patrick and Robin.

October 19th, 2009

Olivia tells Sonny nothing, instead just yelling about Claudia until Michael tells her to be nice. Olivia is then summoned to Pentonville, where Zacchara wonders if she's worthy of Johnny, threatens her life, and decides she's spunky enough to be with his son. Zacchara then summons Johnny, who knows Olivia's been there and makes it clear that Zacchara better not do anything to hurt her. The exes wrap up their evening at Olivia's apartment, soon not to be exes anymore. Dante calls Claudia's bluff and points out that if she tells Sonny about Olivia's secrets, she won't have leverage anymore and Olivia and Johnny will get back together. Claudia finally tells Sonny that she isn't pregnant, and though he feels badly that she's not going to have any children, he doesn't change his mind. Instead, he invites her to tag along on a business trip to Puerto Rico. Dante is disturbed by graffiti that reads "CO77X," but he should be more disturbed by the view of some loft full of crime-scene photos that has "CO77X" painted on the window. Sam and Jason break into and search the formerly vacant/now-occupied house whose address they found in Ian's motel room. They end up getting trapped in the basement when the house's owner comes home, but they then hear a scream and a crash. Everyone thinks Helena's a liar, including Tracy, who gets the board to evict her from the hospital. Luke also announces that he researched Valentin and Helena had him murdered years ago. Elizabeth panics over the thought of Helena telling Lucky about her and Nikolas and having to come clean. She considers staying with Lucky and ending things with Nikolas, but ultimately decides to go break up with Lucky. However, when she goes home to do it, she's greeted by a bunch of family members, which indicates that Lucky's about to announce their engagement.

Can we please stop talking about Johnny and Claudia's sex lives? Thanks.

I thought that graffiti said "COTIX," but apparently it's "CO77X." Either way, I don't know what it means. I'm pretty sure, however, that that loft was Courtney's.

If Sam and Jason get arrested twice in one day, I'll laugh my head off.

Hey, it's Audrey! And Lesley! And Bobbie! It's like a big reunion!

Ug, they cast someone to play Patrick's ex, Lisa. WE DON'T NEED ANY NEW CHARACTERS.

October 20th, 2009

Lucky tells everyone at the Spencers' house that he and Elizabeth are getting remarried, effectively ruining her plans to break up with him. Later Elizabeth goes to Wyndemere and tells Nikolas that she's changed her mind and is going to stay with Lucky. Olivia and Johnny are back together, but she's worried that Claudia will tell Sonny her secrets while they're out of the country. Dante shows up and Johnny swears him to secrecy over his and Olivia's reunion. Dante takes advantage of the Corinthoses' vacation to search the house. Jax shows up and reiterates how badly he wants to see Sonny busted. Sam and Jason get the house's pregnant renter to the hospital, saving both her and her baby. Sam is reminded of losing her own baby, but tells Jason that she's happy with her life and doesn't want to dwell on the negative. Kristina tells Michael that she had sex with Kiefer, and he reacts predictably. Later she tells Alexis that when Kiefer says he's ready for sex, she'll tell him she's not. Nikolas sends Helena to Switzerland after she gets off a few insults on Rebecca's behalf.

I don't get why Olivia thinks it's more likely Claudia will tell Sonny everything while they're in Puerto Rico than while they're in Port Charles. Also, is it weird that even after almost two years, I still sometimes type "Carly" when I mean Claudia?

Dang it, Elizabeth was actually going to do the right thing. Poor Lucky just sealed his own fate.

Kristina, take it from a little sister: Michael doesn't want to hear that you had sex with ANYONE.

No, Helena, don't go! Don't leave me here alone with Rebecca!

October 21st, 2009

Jason believes that Ian hid notes about what he was up to in his patients' charts, so he and Sam get Spinelli to transfer all of Ian's files to a conference room at the hospital. Patrick has started thinking about Ian again and wants to know if he had any accomplices, so he and Robin start to look at Ian's files and see them being moved. They ambush Jason and Sam, offering to help them with their investigation. Alexis spots Sam and Robin working together, finds out what they're up to, and asks Jason to investigate without Sam. Jax confides in Alexis that he's not sure Carly will forgive him when he tells her Jerry was involved in Michael's shooting. Michael has another memory, this one of Jerry, and tells both Jax and Carly that Jerry visited him. Sonny and Claudia tick off a bartender in Puerto Rico. Dante enlists Spinelli to help him find out what "CO77X" means, but their search turns up nothing except Dante's realization that Spinelli does illegal stuff. Max and Diane are still on the outs, and she claims to have another boyfriend in Philadelphia.

Apparently a bunch of people are Googling "CO77X." Heh. Rumor has it that it has something to do with whoever James Franco is going to play next month. I don't know, but after seeing that fan in the loft, I'm more convinced than ever that it was Courtney's. Also, I hope the show got a good deal on "Mad World," if they're going to play it every time this storyline comes up.

Hey, Alexis? Sam's an adult. Worry about your other kids, like the one who's probably going to be knocked up by this time next month.

Excuse me, Michael, but do you see a baby around here? No? Then keep it to yourself.

I love how surprised Dante is that Spinelli does illegal stuff on his computer. Why else would a mob boss employ a computer genius?

Seriously? This is the Sonny/Claudia crap they're giving us? Mojitos?

October 22nd, 2009

Sonny makes it clear to the South American partners that he's in charge, and Claudia proves her partnership by saving him from the bitter bartender. She wants to stay in Puerto Rico another week, since her birthday is the 29th, and though Sonny says they can't, he promises to throw her a big birthday party. Alexis points out to Jason that if the information in Ian's files leads to an accomplice, whom Jason then kills, Sam will be an accessory to murder. Jason brings this up to Sam, but she wants to help despite the consequences. They find a DVD containing a conversation from just a few days before Michael's shooting, and Jason is convinced that it's of Ian being hired to kill Sonny. Spinelli encourages Dante to stop flirting with Lulu, even trying to get Johnny to back him up. Johnny doesn't care who Lulu sees, and Dante doesn't think she's interested anyway. Lulu proves him wrong by agreeing to go to Kelly's with him and talk to him about his personal life. Ethan is furious that Nikolas and Rebecca are still together, but Luke wants him to keep things civil so Lucky and Lulu don't get dragged into the middle of a battle. Michael lies to Carly about his memory of Jerry, and later Jax asks what he really remembered. Dante tries to use Spinelli to get access to Sonny's business info, but it doesn't work. Johnny tells Olivia that if the time comes for him to take Claudia down, he'll spill about her involvement in Michael's shooting.

I'm going to go ahead and guess that Claudia will be dying at her birthday party. Can we please have a murder mystery? It's been a long time since we had one. (No, I don't count the Brianna Hughes story.)

So Jason spends a year and a half looking into the shooting, suspecting Claudia's involvement most of that time, and after Alexis says two words, he starts to rethink his hunch? I love Alexis, but why is he listening to her?? Never listen to Alexis!

Interestingly, the date on the DVD is correct – March 28th, 2008, was the day Claudia hired Ian to kill Sonny. Also, reading the other entries on that page will remind you that a) I once called Claudia a baby killer, b) I noted that Lulu had been "bitten by the bad boy bug" (that never went away, huh?), and c) at one point, there was a chick named Marianna on the show.

I kind of love how Johnny and Lulu are mature enough not to get involved in each other's personal lives. Unlike most of the older adults on the show.

They've recast Steven Webber (third time, I believe), to be played by daytime vet Scott Reeves. Ironically, he's good friends with Steve Burton, and I believe with Rebecca Herbst as well. In other news, Kate still has nothing to do.

October 23rd, 2009

Michael tells Jax that he wants to leave the shooting behind him because he can't change what happened. Spinelli worries that Jason wants to get rid of Claudia so much that he'll frame her for the shooting if he can't find proof that she was involved. He won't help Jason with that, so Jason and Sam are left on their own to keep investigating. They head back to the hospital, where an announcement from Epiphany that the lost-and-found is about to be cleaned out makes them realize that some of Ian's belongings could be there. They find a duffel bag like the one they found in the formerly vacant house and discover a ton of CDs inside. Though Sam is skeptical that Jason will be able to let go of the search if the CDs don't tell them anything, they go through them anyway. Just as Michael remembers Jerry telling him that Claudia was responsible for his shooting, Jason and Sam come across a recording of Claudia, Jerry, and Ian planning the hit on Sonny. Sonny has a dream about Michael's shooting and is comforted by Claudia. He finds her so helpful and wonderful that he wants to start planning a big birthday party for her right away. Kate urges Olivia to tell Sonny and Dante that they're father and son, but Olivia continues to refuse. Kate then encourages Dante to quit Sonny's case and leave town, which he also refuses. She seems poised to tell him Olivia's secret, but we all know that won't happen. Kristina confides some of her guy trouble to Dante, who tells her what we all know – that Kiefer's a huge jerk. Robin and Patrick are cute some more and totally setting up for the inevitable trouble that will come when his ex shows up. CO77X guy has some sort of obsession with Jason.

Congratulations, Jason and Sam: not only did you find evidence that Claudia was behind the shooting, you also have evidence against Jerry for conspiracy to commit murder. And you didn't even obtain any of it illegally!

I guess Sonny and Claudia have to get closer so it'll be a bigger shock to him when he gets Jason's proof.

Yay for Kate/Coleman scenes!

Dear Kristina, your long-lost brother who hasn't even met Kiefer thinks he's a jerk. Maybe you should listen?

October 24th, 2009

Next week: big week! Lots of drama! Lots of secrets exposed! Instead of giving everything away, here's a game so you can try to figure everything out yourself. Match the secret with the person who finds out about it.

Claudia put the hit on Sonny                                                           Lulu
Jerry was involved                                                                        Luke
Nikolas and Elizabeth are more than friends                                     Everyone
Dante's an undercover cop                                                             Carly

Basically, I think the next two weeks are going to be awesome.

October 26th, 2009

Jason jumps into assassin mode, immediately wanting to take Claudia out. Sam naïvely thinks that Sonny might not kill Claudia, but she also thinks Sonny should know what's going on so that he can make the decision about what happens to her. Jason tells her that her involvement ends here, and also declines to tell Spinelli about the proof so he can't be linked to whatever happens. Michael wants to tell Sonny about Claudia's hit, though Kristina, like her sister, is naïve enough to think Sonny might take the information to the police. Michael decides to give Johnny fair warning that Claudia's days are numbered because he remembered what happened. Sonny asks Carly to organize Claudia's birthday party, so she decides to gouge him on every price she can. Jax tries to hand the project over to Olivia, who's just as excited about the party as Carly is. Jax announces that he doesn't want Carly anywhere near the party. Sonny and Claudia's plane home faces turbulence, like they're really going to kill Claudia in a plane crash when Jason's waiting for her with a gun. Olivia shuts Kate up and warns her that Dante could be killed if any secrets came out. Kate points out that Dante could kill Sonny or vice versa, so Olivia might want to think things over more thoroughly. Robin and Patrick worry that they've become accessories to murder by helping Jason find the evidence against Claudia. Robin debates warning her or telling Mac what's going on, but Patrick thinks they should let things play out. Kiefer wants to have sex with Kristina at the hotel the same day as the party.

Kristina clearly hasn't been spending much time with her father, if she thinks he's going to go to the police about Claudia. Hello, Kristina! Mobster!

Lily has got to be the most-mentioned dead character on this show. She died more than 13 years ago!

I love Carly trying to get as much money out of Sonny as she can. Dude, when did I start liking Carly so much?

Today was supposed to be Greg Vaughan's last day. A fond farewell to the second-best Lucky, and I wish him much success.

And tomorrow we get to party again.

October 27th, 2009

(Famous Original!) Lucky and Elizabeth go to the casino because Elizabeth wants Lucky to reconnect with Luke, but their visit is cut short when Elizabeth starts fantasizing about Nikolas and decides they need to leave. Once they're home, Elizabeth tries to distract Lucky with sex, but she's still fantasizing about Nikolas and admits to Lucky that she loves him but isn't sure they're doing the right thing. As he calls Laura for advice, Elizabeth and Nikolas meet up on the docks and make out, unaware that Luke has seen them. Johnny scrambles to get in touch with Claudia, whose plane made an emergency landing and who is out of touch. Jason stops by to tell him that whatever happens next isn't personal. Johnny's smart enough to know exactly what he's talking about, but he still has no luck reaching Claudia, and he now has the added problem of being ambushed by Joey Limbo. Sam and Jason figure out that Claudia sent Jerry after Michael and Kristina in Mexico, so now Sam is completely on board with Jason killing Claudia. They learn about the party and note that their proof will make it very interesting. Lulu overhears Dante and Ronnie talking about Sonny's case and realizes that Dante's a cop. Fortunately for him, she's been accidentally drugged and is so loopy that there's no way she'll remember what she overheard. Dante takes her to his room, where Lulu admits that she wouldn't mind being taken advantage of. Carly tells Michael about the party and he blurts out that he doesn't think Sonny will want to throw any kind of party for her soon enough. Nikolas and Ethan get into a fight at the casino and Luke warns Ethan not to upset the peace between the Cassadines and Spencers.

Helloooooooo, Jonathan Jackson. You just made a couple million women very happy.

So did Jason go to Johnny's garage just to tell him he's going to kill his sister? That was weird.

Why do Nikolas and Rebecca keep going to the casino? Maybe she secretly likes having Ethan and Nikolas fight over her. Little drama queen.

Today's MOTE goes to Julie Marie Berman (Lulu) not just for being loopy but for hilariously stating that she didn't want to go to the hospital because the food is bad and Epiphany would yell at her.

October 28th, 2009

As Jason prepares to play the proof for Sonny, Carly tells him that Michael's acting strangely and asks what's going on. Meanwhile, Michael asks Sam why Jason hates Claudia, but she won't tell him anything. Jax threatens to kill Sonny if Claudia's party does anything to harm Carly or the baby. Jason finally plays the proof for Sonny, but he doesn't have much of a reaction to it. Claudia can't get in touch with Johnny and thinks Olivia has something to do with his sudden disappearance, so she tells Dante she'll expose his secret if he doesn't find Johnny and get him to the party. She tells Olivia the same, only about a different secret. Johnny's being held by Limbo on Zacchara's orders; Zacchara plans to have Limbo kill Sonny and Jason, and he doesn't want Johnny to be in the line of fire. Luke and Nikolas both question whether Lucky's sure he wants to remarry Elizabeth, but Lucky doesn't get the hint or respond to the seeds of doubt they're trying to plant. He thinks Elizabeth's worried about being perfect and assures her that she doesn't have to be. Lulu is shocked to wake up in Dante's room, but he assures her that nothing happened (and keeps her discovery about his real job to himself).

As if this week couldn't get any better, I just heard that Natalia Livingston is leaving. Here's hoping Helena kills her painfully.

Jason, you may need to replay that CD with commentary. I don't think Sonny gets it.

It would be pretty ironic if Claudia died because Johnny couldn't warn her thanks to their father. Ironic and awesome, of course.

Jax? Shut up.

October 29th, 2009

Sonny seemingly disregards the proof recording and heads to Claudia's party, where he acts like nothing's wrong, behaving like a normal party host and even sharing a light moment with Floyd (who wants Alexis back as DA). Olivia attacks Claudia and the two get into a knock-down, drag-out fight that's eventually broken up by the police. Olivia is taken to the police station, but Mac is just as eager to have Dante bust Sonny as Jax is, so he lets her go to the hotel and stop Claudia from blowing Dante's cover. Molly and Morgan come across Johnny and distract his guards long enough to free him. Dante tells Carly that Michael's at the party, so Carly, who'd planned on staying home, goes over to get him. As Olivia, Johnny, and Carly all arrive within moments of each other, Sonny gives a speech thanking the guests for the nice things they've done over the years, then prepares to tell everyone who Claudia really is.

I have to give the editors lots of praise for the final scenes today. I loved how they went back and forth between Sonny's speech and Carly, Olivia, and Johnny coming to the party, all leading up to...nothing. Nice fake-out. I guess we have to tune in tomorrow to see the fireworks.

Why the heck would Floyd go to a mobster's party? Why the heck would Sonny even invite him?

I can't wait until Zacchara finds out Joey Limbo and his two thugs were bested by two ten-year-olds. Also, is Johnny going to have to wear that handcuff for the rest of this storyline, like Jin on Lost?

We don't even get to see Jason all dressed up? Rip-off.

October 30th, 2009

Sonny announces that Claudia was responsible for Michael's shooting, tearing into her in front of everyone. No matter how much she tries to deny it, she's unable to convince anyone that she's innocent. Johnny tries to take the blame but no one believes him. Sonny also reveals Jerry's involvement in the hit, and Carly realizes that Jax knew about it the whole time. Claudia pulls a gun so Jason does the same, but Claudia uses hers to take a now-laboring Carly hostage and get her out of the hotel in a guest's rental car. The police are summoned and prevent anyone from running after Carly and Claudia, since Mac doesn't want anyone else to get shot. Luke somehow manages to get out anyway, after getting in touch with some mystery helper. Johnny and Dante both offer their help to the police, since they know the most about Zacchara resources Claudia might use, and Johnny assures Jason that he knows the top priority is helping Carly. Knowing that Jason will kill Claudia if he finds her, Mac has him arrested for pulling his gun so he can keep him locked up for 48 hours. Jax protests, knowing that Jason can save Carly, and exclaims that Carly and the baby shouldn't have to suffer just because Michael was shot. Michael overhears this and is stunned by his stepfather's attitude. He's also changed his tune and now wants Claudia to pay for her crimes, since she's put his mother in danger. Carly tries to appease Claudia, but it doesn't work since Claudia knows she's a dead woman walking and there's no way to save herself. She considers killing Carly to hurt Sonny and Jason, then threatens to take Carly's baby away. That pushes Carly over the edge, leading her to grab the steering wheel and crash the car. Kristina is shaken by her father's behavior towards Carly. Olivia suggests revealing Dante's job to reduce the number of secrets Claudia can spill.

I can't believe I'm on Sonny's side about something, but I kind of feel bad that everyone's blaming him for Claudia's actions. It's not like he knew she was going to pull a gun and take someone hostage. Also, he's not the one who lied to his wife for months about his brother being involved in her son's near death, Jax.

So who is Luke's super-secret helper? And why is he helping so much? I know Carly's his niece, but he's still never shown this much interest in helping her.

You know, Mac, letting Jason kill Claudia would probably help keep the level of violence in town down. Just sayin'.

Hey, Robin, if you're sick of the violence in Port Charles, I'm afraid you're going to have to move somewhere else.

Birthday: Claudia Zacchara
In labor: Carly Jacks
Kidnapped: Carly Jacks, Johnny Zacchara (rescued)

October 31st, 2009

Next week: they all lived happily ever after. Uh, not Claudia.

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