"The Convention"
Written by Lee Eisenberg and Gene Stupnitsky; directed by Ken Whittingham

Michael arrives at the office and asks Pam if she saw Oprah the day before. He announces that he’s going to be a father - Angelina Jolie was on the show and talking about adopting an Asian baby, which is what Michael wants to do. He wants Pam to research how much adoption would cost. Pam tells him it’s a big decision, adding that the application alone can cost $1,000. He asks her to look for a less expensive baby. Pam tells him that it can take as long as eight months to get a child, and Michael notes that he’s not sure he’ll still want a baby in eight months. He tries to make a deal that they’ll have a child together if neither has had one in ten years. She bargains him up to 30 years. Later, Ryan and Michael go over a packing list and Michael receives a per diem from Angela. He explains that he’s heading to Philadelphia for a convention, which Jim will also be attending. Michael feels sorry for Jim because he has to work for Josh. In the lunchroom, Dwight tries to console Angela, who isn’t happy that he’s also going to the convention. She thinks he can’t wait to get away from her. She interviews that her family uses “looks like someone took the slow train from Philly” as code for “check out that slut.” She then wonders why there are flies in the room.

Kelly rushes over to Pam, excited about her evening plans, and is surprised that Pam is planning to wear the clothes she has on. Pam interviews that she’s going on a date with a cartoonist from a local paper. She decides she probably shouldn’t talk too much about the fact that this is her first first date in nine years. Kelly encourages her not to sleep with the guy on the first date, since that will give him all the power. Michael overhears the conversation and Kelly tells him that Pam is going out with her neighbor Alan. Michael thinks she should wear her wedding dress. Pam says no, so Michael tells her to at least unbutton her top button. He asks if she has any message for him to give to Jim, but she’s flustered and just says, “Um.” In the kitchen, Creed asks Angela if he can get some money like Michael did; she explains that it’s per diem for the trip to Philadelphia. He tells Meredith (who he seems to think is new) that Angela is the annoying one in the office but she’ll get used to her. On the train to Philadelphia, Michael takes Dwight’s pillow and pretends he can’t hear him over his music. At their hotel, the two meet up with Josh and Jim, whom Michael seems to feel betrayed him by transferring to Stanford.

Jim and Dwight’s rivalry immediately kicks back in and Jim wonders if he can play any pranks while they’re at the convention. Back at the office, Kevin tells Toby that Pam is single again, commenting that if he weren’t engaged, he would be all over it. Back in Philadelphia, Josh tells Michael that if the Stanford branch absorbs the Scranton branch, he’ll find a place for Michael in the company. Jan arrives and Michael announces that they need to set some ground rules. He’s still dating Carol, so he doesn’t want anything to happen with Jan during the convention. Jan tells him to get away from her. “Thank you for being so brave with all of this,” he replies. In the lunchroom at Dunder Mifflin, Kelly tells Pam that Alan’s cartoons are so smart, half the time she doesn’t understand them. Toby tries to get up the courage to talk to Pam but can’t. Michael and Dwight decorate Michael’s room for a party (complete with liquor and a dart board), trying to offer Jim and Josh drinks before they go meet Jan. Jim and Josh laugh over an inside joke and Michael obviously feels left out. Josh and Jim leave and Dwight offers to do a shot with Michael, who reminds him that it’s not even lunchtime yet. Downstairs, Michael grabs a bunch of swag and invites Jerome Bettis to his party. “Who do they call him the bus?” Dwight asks Michael. “Because he’s afraid to fly,” Michael explains.

Michael, Dwight, Josh, and Jim wait around for Jan, who e-mails Josh to tell the guys where to meet her. Michael pretends to get the same message but Dwight points out that he doesn’t have e-mail on his phone. Michael pretends to get a phone call, then pulls Dwight aside to tell him to research Josh and find out if he has any “skeletons in his attic.” Back at the office, Toby tries again to talk to Pam but chickens out after they’re interrupted by the phone. At lunch, Dwight tells Michael that he called a friend at the sheriff’s department to look into Josh’s background, but the friend isn’t volunteering today. Michael tells Jim that he moved Ryan to Jim’s old desk, and Jim tells Michael to say hi for him. He then asks for Toby (becoming very aware of the camera), and Michael complains about Toby, then asks if he’s the reason Jim left Scranton. Jim says he just had a better opportunity in Stanford. Michael takes it personally and asks if Josh is funnier than him or if he has a girlfriend, since Michael basically has two. Jim replies that it’s not a competition. Michael uses his per diem to tip the group’s waiter, leading Jan to ask him what he’s generated. Michael replies that he’s generated interest in his party, inviting everyone to his room that night. Jan reminds him that they’re supposed to be attending meetings, adding that she can’t stay on top of him all the time. Michael finds this funny, of course.

Back at the office, Phyllis advises Pam to order the most expensive thing on the menu at dinner so Alan will know she’s worth it. Stanley notes that if she does that, she’ll have to sleep with him. Phyllis agrees. A disguised Angela comes to the hotel in Philadelphia, and though Michael is nearby, he doesn’t recognize her. He meets up with the others on the convention floor before Josh tries to leave for a meeting that doesn’t start for 45 minutes. Michael suggests a paper-airplane-throwing competition, then gets a phone call from Pam. Everyone says hi to her, though Jim is thrown off, and Michael mentions that she has a date. Back at the office, Pam glances over at Jim’s old desk. Michael and Josh start their plane competition, which quickly ends when Josh and Jim head off. Michael interviews that he and Jim have very different ideas of what friendship is. He’s decided to end things now because long-distance relationships never work out. A paper rep is in the room with him and agrees. Back in the lobby, Michael is able to tell the others that he’s gotten a deal with Hammermill, which used to be exclusively with Staples. Jan admits that she underestimated Michael. Jim gets his hands on Dwight’s room key, and when he goes in to play a prank, he discovers a partially obscured Angela on the bed. He runs out, gleefully saying that Dwight got a hooker and wondering who he can call to talk to.

Pam and Alan double-date with Kelly and Ryan, which Ryan, of course, is thrilled about. Someone arrives for Michael’s party and is surprised that no one else is there. Alan draws on a napkin and talks to Pam about his cartoon, then looks at her chest, making her even more uncomfortable than she already was. At the hotel in Philadelphia, Michael is still the only person at his party. After her date, Pam interviews that she didn’t have a love connection with Alan, but when she finds someone she likes again, she’ll know. At the hotel, Jim hears music coming from Michael’s room and heads over to find him in the dark with a strobe light on. He asks Michael if he did something wrong, and Michael complains about how great Josh is. Jim assures him that he’s not the reason he transferred - it was because of Pam. Michael tells Jim that she’s single now, but Jim says that he put everything on the line twice and was rejected twice. Michael offers to talk to Pam, suggesting that Jim talk to Roy, since they’ll know how the other is feeling. A couple of people arrive for the party and Jim tells them that he and Michael are friends. Michael interviews that he doesn’t need a ton of friends “because a real relationship can’t be forced.” Back in Michael’s hotel room, he and Dwight play with the black light and illuminate stains all over the room.

MEMORABLE QUOTES: “Poor little guy has been stuck working under Josh, the poor man’s Michael Scott…as he is known around my condo.” - Michael

“I was shocked when he told me he was transferring to Stamford. It’s like with firemen. You don’t leave your brothers behind…even if you find out that there is a better fire in Connecticut.” - Michael

“I love inside jokes. I’d love to be a part of one someday.” - Michael

Jan: “Well, Michael, I underestimated you.”
Michael: “Yeah, well, maybe next time you will estimate me.”

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