"The Dundies"
Written by Mindy Kaling; directed by Greg Daniels

Michael tells the camera that tonight is the Dundies, Dunder Mifflin’s annual awards night. He thinks that everyone looks forward to it because they won’t get trophies anywhere else. At the reception desk, Jim asks Pam if she’s looking forward to the Dundies. She’s definitely not. Michael gives the camera a tour of past Dundie winners, like Jim, though he doesn’t keep his trophies in the office. Dwight reveals that his are at home in a case above his bed. Stanley doesn’t have his trophies at the office either, but that’s because he threw them out. He then asks Michael if they’re going to order more appetizers this year, since they ran out last year. Michael agrees, since Kevin ate what he wanted last year. In the conference room, Pam has to look through videos of past Dundies to get the highlights. This may or may not include Michael’s version of “Mambo Number 5,” with Dwight accompanying him on recorder.

Later, Dwight overhears Pam, Phyllis, and Kelly talking about something and thinks they’re laughing at him. They’re actually laughing about something someone wrote about Michael in the women’s bathroom. Dwight demands to know what it is, promising Kelly that she’ll be punished less if she tells him. Michael talks to Jan on the phone and asks her if she’s planning on coming to the Dundies. She’s not, since it’s a long drive from New York. Plus, corporate doesn’t approve of the activity and won’t be paying for it, since Michael has already thrown one party that year, the 5/05/05 party. In an interview, Michael does a Karnack impression, then admits that there won’t be an open bar the Dundies this year because of Jan. He tries to convince himself it’ll be okay, but he wishes people would be drunk to better appreciate his humor. Dwight tries to sneak into the women’s restroom but gets caught by Phyllis, who thinks he’s a pervert.

Pam watches an old Dundie night in which she receives the award for longest engagement. Roy thinks it’s funny but Jim is as uncomfortable as Pam. Jim goes to Michael and encourages him not to give out the same award this year, since everyone will see it coming. Elsewhere, Dwight announces to everyone that if the women in the office can’t act like ladies, they’ll no longer be allowed to have a ladies room. Michael arrives and Pam fills him in, but Michael is preoccupied and can’t deal with the situation. He tells everyone that there have been rumors about having no money for the Dundies, but they’re having them. Also, he wants everyone to invite friends and family to the event. That night, everyone gathers at Chili’s, and Michael starts off the ceremony by rapping his own version of Naughty by Nature’s “OPP.” Ryan has some problems keeping up with his cue cards. Oscar interviews that it’s like a kid’s birthday party where there’s nothing for you to do but the kid is having fun.

Michael welcomes everyone to the Dundies, then has to announce that there won’t be a group tab this year. Stanley notes that they were supposed to bring their families, but Michael doesn’t get that his wife is there with him. Michael tries to change the subject by telling a joke, but Dwight steps all over it. Roy and Darryl quickly get bored and decide to leave, so Pam goes out with them. Michael gives the first award of the night, the “busiest beaver” award, to Phyllis, but “busiest” is misspelled “bushiest.” Out in the parking lot, Pam and Roy argue and she refuses to leave with him. She returns to the restaurant as Michael is doing one of his characters, Ping, and steals Jim’s drink. Later, as Pam gets drunker, Michael gives Ryan the “hottest in the office” award, then smacks his butt. Angela then gets the “tight a%$” award but refuses to accept it.

After Pam starts really getting drunk, Michael gives Kelly the spicy curry award and tries to play it off like it’s not because she’s Indian. Later, he sweats and complains that this is a tough event. As he awards another trophy, singing “you have won a tiny Dundie” to the tune of “Tiny Dancer,” someone else in the restaurant starts heckling him and Pam steals drinks from Stanley and his wife. Michael tries to talk to the hecklers, but then decides to wrap things up because no one’s having fun. He gives Kevin the “don’t go in there after me” award and Pam quickly livens everything up by cheering for Kevin. Jim joins her and they both tell Michael that they haven’t gotten awards yet. They chant for Dundies and everyone joins in, finally having fun. The next trophy, the “fine work” award, goes to Stanley, who jokes that last year he got the “great work” award, so he’s not sure what this means.

As Michael starts to give Pam her award, Jim gets nervous, but she gets the “whitest sneakers” award. Pam’s acceptance speech is both appreciative and funny. When Pam returns to her seat, she throws her arms around Jim and kisses him. He kisses back, but it only lasts for a couple of seconds, and when it’s over, Pam seems to have already forgotten it. Later, Jim interviews (with Pam next to him at the bar) that this was a great Dundies ceremony - they saw Ping, they learned of Michael’s true feelings for Ryan, and Michael ruined a number of classic songs for Jim. Pam nods a few times, then falls off her stool. (Jim makes sure the camera captured the moment.) Dwight tries to help out, since he’s a volunteer sheriff’s deputy. He starts to take off his shirt to cushion Pam’s head but an employee tells him not to strip in the restaurant.

At the end of the night, everyone helps Michael return his props to his car. Pam shows off her trophy to the camera and cheers that this was the best Dundies ever. A Chili’s employee interviews that they have a policy not to over-serve, but Pam got drunk because she was stealing drinks from other people. He Xeroxed her driver’s license and she won’t be allowed to return to Chili’s ever again. In the parking lot, Michael thanks Dwight for his good work on the audio. Dwight makes sure Ryan heard this praise. Pam tells Jim that she wrote on the bathroom wall, which surprises him. She asks him if she can ask him a question, but when she realizes that she’s on camera, she just thanks him. She heads off with Angela and Jim just looks at the camera and smiles a little.

MEMORABLE QUOTES: “You know what they say about a car wreck, where it’s so awful you can’t look away? The Dundies are like a car wreck that you want to look away, but you have to stare at it because your boss is making you.” - Pam

“What am I going to do with the award? Nothing. I-I don’t know what I’m going to do. That’s the least of my concerns right now.” - Ryan

Jim: “I think those might be empty.”
Pam: “No, no. ‘Cause the ice melts, and then it’s, like, second drink!”

“I have so many people to thank for this award. Okay, first off, my Keds. Because I couldn’t have done it without them. Thank you. Let’s give Michael a round of applause for emceeing tonight, because this is a lot harder than it looks. And also because of Dwight, too. Um, so, finally, I want to thank God. Because God gave me this Dundie. And I feel God in this Chili's tonight. WOOOOOOOO!” - Pam

“Was this year’s Dundies a success? Well, let’s see. I made Pam laugh so hard that she fell out of her chair, and she almost broke her neck. So I killed, almost.” - Michael

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