"The Nanny and the Professor"
Written by Scott Kaufer; directed by Peter Lauser

Rory and Lorelai walk through Stars Hollow, discussing the revelation (to Lorelai, at least) that the plural of cul-de-sac is culs-de-sac. Lorelai wonders if the plural if yo-yo is yos-yo. Lane is now working at the diner, and Lorelai hopes that the girls can get something out of this. She thinks that Lane might give them access to the secret things Luke keeps in the back. Luke tells the girls that Lane isn’t going to work out - she’s too good. He’s not even sure why she took the job, since he blew the interview. He doesn’t think that Lane will be challenged, so the girls suggest that he buy her a chemistry set or a foosball table. Rory and Lorelai talk about how Rory is planning to head back to school before her roommates return from break. Paris has gone skiing with Jamie, and Rory thinks that things are okay between them. The girls wonder where Luke will go when the Luke/Lane team inevitably breaks up. Later, Lorelai and Michel head to Sookie’s house to discuss crown molding for the new inn. Michel thinks that the get-together will turn into a tasting, which it does. He’s upset about this because he’s afraid of gaining too much weight. Tobin (see “Happy Birthday, Baby!”) appears, causing Michel to comment, “I’m being Punk’d.” Tobin is taking care of Davey for a little while, and Michel is upset to learn that he and Sookie went shopping together. Tobin thinks that Michel’s voice hurts the baby’s ears. He’s angry that Tobin has ingratiated himself in the group meeting.

At Friday night dinner, Lorelai is still stuck on the culs-de-sac thing. Richard is surprised that no one ever corrected Lorelai for saying cul-de-sacs. Richard and Emily have brought the girls marzipan from Switzerland. Lorelai is upset that they didn’t bring chocolate. When she finds out her marzipan is shaped like a bunny, Lorelai decides to try it after all. Digger drops by and he and Lorelai don’t mention their date (see “Ted Koppel’s Big Night Out”). He claims to like the marzipan, though the girls don’t. After Digger leaves, Lorelai slips into the next room and calls him; they set up another date for Monday. She asks him what he’s going to do with his marzipan. He replies that he might give it to the clients he doesn’t like. Rory returns to Yale and spots Paris and Asher together again (see “Ted Koppel’s Big Night Out”). Paris comes to the suite and both girls pretend that everything is normal. Rory heads back home to find Lorelai engaging in a creative cleaning practice. Rory explains that Paris and Jamie are not together and she’s actually dating a Yale professor. Lorelai guesses that they’re probably sleeping together; she’s shocked to learn that Asher is 60 and is friends with Richard. Rory feels bad for Jamie, but Lorelai says that if Paris likes someone else, there’s nothing Rory can do about it. She brings up Dean, but Rory points out that she didn’t cheat on Dean with an older man. She notes that Asher is risking a lot by doing this. “He’ll always have Paris,” Lorelai quips. Michel calls, panicking about something, and Lorelai leaves to tend to him.

Michel drags Lorelai into Sookie’s house and explains that he offered to watch Davey so that Sookie and Jackson could go out. Of course, Michel doesn’t like children, and vice versa, so Davey immediately started crying. Michel started a game with him, but Davey wound up getting stuck under the bed. Michel was going to get him out, but the baby fell asleep and Michel decided to just leave him alone so he wouldn’t start crying again. Lorelai announces that they need to lift up the bed so that they can get Davey out. Michel starts taking his shirt off, since it’s expensive and he doesn’t want it to wrinkle, but Lorelai refuses to let him undress. They retrieve the baby and Lorelai asks Michel what’s going on with him. He admits that he hates Tobin and is mad that he keeps coming back. He thinks that Tobin wants to replace him. Lorelai assures him that the rivalry is all in his head - she and Sookie like Tobin, but they’re addicted to Michel. She points out that they did ask Michel to come to the Dragonfly with them. She adds that as long as he stays away from Davey, everything will be fine. At Yale’s newspaper office, Rory and Paris make newspaper hats; Paris has a talent for it, thanks to Martha Stewart. Apparently this is a tradition, which Glenn doesn’t like. Doyle gives a speech, welcoming Rory, Paris, and Glenn to the staff and talking about how much he hates Time. Paris asks Rory for her opinion on her interview with Asher, then leaves to take a phone call.

Lorelai and Digger head to his apartment after their date; apparently she talked through the whole movie and Digger almost got into a fight with another moviegoer because of her. Lorelai notes that Digger doesn’t have a lot of tchotchkes, and the dog he mentioned is so still that he’s practically fake. Lorelai and Digger start making out. Back at Yale, Rory brings Doyle ice cream. He disapproves of the chunks of strawberries in it. She notices that he’s upset about something and he confides that he’s having trouble with his editorial writers. He was also rejected as a stringer for Time, which explains why he hates them. Glenn complains that Paris isn’t there; Rory makes excuses for her so she won’t get in trouble. Lorelai and Digger hang around his apartment post-coitus. Digger notes that he has some quirks and asks Lorelai to sleep in the guest room, since he’s a light sleeper and can’t sleep in the same bed as someone else. She thinks he’s trying to get her to leave, but he asks her to just look at the guest room for a second. She likes it but thinks that she should leave without making everything into a big deal. Digger says that it would be a big deal to him if she left, so Lorelai agrees to stay. At Yale, Paris arrives home late at night and purposely tries to wake Rory up. Rory blasts her for leaving so that Rory had to cover for her. She adds that she doesn’t want to know where Paris was or who she was with. “I smell like pipe tobacco,” Paris replies.

In the morning, Digger cooks breakfast for Lorelai, who had a very good night in the guest room. She asks to talk about what they want to tell people about their relationship. He thinks that everything is fairly simple, but she notes that things are never simple when it comes to her parents. She says that she would like to keep the relationship from Emily and Richard. Digger thinks that the news will eventually come out, but Lorelai points out his father Floyd won’t appreciate their relationship. She promises that they’ll tell the truth after a while and Digger agrees to keep quiet for now. Lorelai heads to her parents’ house for Friday night dinner, followed by a number of people who are being made to wait outside. She learns that a historical society is using the house for a walking tour, which annoys Emily and Richard, even though it’s for a good cause. A tourist thinks that the Gilmores are actors hired to play a family. Lorelai notes that her parents have been going to a lot of functions lately. They talk about the one they were at the night before and Emily complains about Digger’s date, who she thinks was a gold-digger. She also thinks that Digger is “an immature little con artist.” Lorelai tries to get more information on the date and whether or not Digger seemed serious about her. Emily says that she looked like the perfect first wife for him.

Lorelai, Sookie, and Michel go to the Dragonfly, the girls teasing that the bathroom will be Michel’s office. Digger arrives and meets Michel and Sookie; Lorelai assures Digger that they know who he is. Lorelai brings up the function and Digger’s date, blasting him for taking another woman out. Digger says that he wishes he could have taken Lorelai instead, but since she said she didn’t want her parents to know about them, there was nothing he could do. She wishes that he had warned her so that she hadn’t been blindsided. Digger says that if they don’t tell Richard and Emily, he’s going to have to take other women to functions. Lorelai still wants to keep quiet and says that she’ll figure out how to adjust. Digger says it’s fine for her - she doesn’t have to deal with the annoying women he takes to the functions. At Yale, Rory discovers that Asher is one of her professors for the semester. He recognizes her and notes that they have someone in common - Richard. She’s not thrilled about the turn of events.

MEMORABLE QUOTES: “They sat in complete silence for a full five minutes, then Luke said, ‘How ya doing?’ and she said, ‘Good,’ and then he gave her the job.” - Rory, re: Lane’s job interview with Luke

“As long as super low-rise jeans are in fashion for men, I must stay trim or I’ll die.” - Michel

Tobin: “I moved to Utah because I heard there was lots of job opportunities for industrious Mormons.”
Lorelai: “I didn’t know you were a Mormon.”
Tobin: “I wasn’t, so I became one. The paperwork took weeks. And I didn’t know about the alcohol thing.”

Digger: “Cyrus, a little to the left.”
(The dog moves to the left)
Lorelai: “What the he%$’s that good for?”
Digger: “Well, what the he%$ is ‘sit’ good for?”
Lorelai: “When you sit, you get a cookie.”
Digger: “Well, when you move a little to the left, you get the satisfaction of knowing you are doing something, but you are not pandering for a dog bone.”
Lorelai: “Can he move a little to the right?”
Digger: “No, not yet. We just do a little to the left until he hits the wall, and then I turn him around.”

Doyle: “What is this?”
Rory: “Strawberry ice cream.”
Doyle: “It has strawberries in it.”
Rory: “I don’t even know how to respond to that.”

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