"Weapons of Class Destruction"
Veronica and Leo are outside her apartment, kissing after a date. He wants to come inside eventually, but she’s nervous about parading him around in front of Keith, who isn’t thrilled that they’re two and a half years apart. Leo leaves and Veronica goes inside, where she finds Keith trying to pretend that he wasn’t spying. Instead of talking to her about her relationship, he confesses that he’s been seeing Alicia (see “Like a Virgin”). Over at the Fennels’ house, Wallace has heard the same news and is as shocked as Veronica is. At school the next day, Wallace and Veronica share some awkward silence before Veronica points out that they could get bunk beds if Keith and Alicia get married. After Wallace leaves, Veronica notices that someone has written “KillemAll.net” on a table. She heads to journalism class, where she wonders if Duncan likes her again, as well as if he killed Lilly. The journalism teacher, Ms. Stafford (who likes to say, “We’re burning daylight here”), tries to get some new article ideas, but she wants more optimistic ones than the ones the students have. The class is interrupted by a fire drill and Ms. Stafford suggests that Veronica write an article about the number of drills the school has had recently. After she leaves, Veronica and Duncan discuss the fact that Ms. Stafford used to be the pep squad advisor and has replaced Ms. Dent because she’s out on maternity leave. Later, Veronica goes to Clemmons’ office to ask about the fire drills; he tells her that they’re just following the district’s policy. Ms. Stafford suggests that Veronica speak to the assistant superintendent instead. She does so, and learns that the policy dictates that the school only has to have one drill per semester.
Veronica runs into Corny (see the pilot), who invites Veronica to come get high with him. He spots a security officer with a dog and fears that he’s going to get busted for possession, but the dog doesn’t notice his drugs. The assistant superintendent calls Clemmons and tells him that Veronica called and mentioned that the school has had a lot of drills. Clemmons reveals that they were actually related to bomb threats, which is why he’s brought in the bomb squad. He doesn’t realize that he’s actually talking to Veronica. Later, she turns in a story about Clemmon’s news, telling Ms. Stafford and Duncan that Clemmons himself confirmed the information. They publish the article, and when it goes out, the students freak about the possibility of being blown up. Veronica and Ms. Stafford are summoned to Clemmons’ office, where they argue about what the students are allowed to write about. He’s not happy to realize that Veronica verified the story through him. In Veronica’s English class, a new student named Ben voices apathetic opinions, much to his friend Norris’ admiration. At the Mars’ apartment, Keith and Alicia happily watch a movie while Veronica and Wallace hang out uncomfortably in her room. Veronica says that she doesn’t think the relationship will last, since her mom will eventually come back. They argue, and after Veronica asks Wallace to do her a favor and wait a few weeks, he shoots back that he’s tired of doing her favors. He hurries Alicia out of the apartment; on the way to the car, she asks him to be mature about the relationship. She tells him that she finally feels comfortable in Neptune and really likes Keith, so she wants Wallace to leave them alone.
At school, Veronica interrupts a conversation between Mac and a guy named Pete to ask Mac to fix her computer. Mac says she’ll take it with her and look at it later. Pete tells Veronica that he has info about her bomb threat article - he saw Norris and Ben throwing exploding tennis balls at stray cats. A little later, Veronica and Wallace easily make up and Veronica quickly asks Wallace about Ben. Wallace tells her that Norris might be a bigger threat, since he wore a shirt that said, “Kill ‘em all. Let God sort ‘em out.” Veronica looks at KillemAll.net, which has a counter counting down 46 hours and 15 minutes. At lunch, Veronica winds up sitting by herself. Meg takes pity on her, though Duncan is reluctant, and Veronica tells them about a case she and Keith are handling in which a guy disappeared so he wouldn’t have to give his ex-wife any money. She explains that the best ways to disappear are to pay for everything in cash, get a prepaid cell phone, get a fake driver’s license and rental car, leave the country, and get a fake passport. Duncan leaves and Meg tells Veronica that he’s been acting strangely all day. Veronica studies Ben and Norris, flashing back to just after Lilly’s death, when an 09er threw spitballs at her and Norris stood up for her. In the present, she heads to their table and pretends that she’s taking a poll, asking who they would want to be in a bomb shelter with. (Norris picks Bruce Lee, Joe Strummer, and Sam Kinison.) Later, Wallace tells Veronica that he tried to find Ben’s file but couldn’t; however, he did get Norris’ file. (He wants the top bunk in exchange.) She thanks him sincerely and he tells her that he’s glad she’s getting help for her mom.
Veronica finds Duncan in the journalism room and spills that Logan told him Veronica is keeping a file on him regarding Lilly’s murder (see “Kanes and Abel’s”). He asks her what the file says and she admits that she knows he has epilepsy. He’s angry that she’s prying into his life and Lilly’s death; he’s even more upset to hear her say that Koontz was paid to confess to Lilly’s murder. He wonders if she thinks that his parents paid Koontz off to protect him. Veronica asks him if he remembers what happened the day of Lilly’s death and he accuses her of believing that he killed his sister, then runs off. Not long after, Veronica overhears Ben and Norris fighting and Norris saying that he can’t hang out with Ben if he’s just going to talk about guns. Veronica tails Ben to the Camelot Motel and a garden store, where she takes photos of him buying fertilizer and putting it in his trunk, next to a big gun. Logan calls Veronica to warn her that Duncan knows about her file on him. They’re interrupted when Ben confronts Veronica and makes her drive him to the Camelot. Before he can do anything to her there, Logan arrives and punches Ben. Veronica stops them from killing each other by looking at Ben’s wallet and revealing that he’s a federal agent. Ben explains that he’s undercover at Neptune, investigating Internet traffic for the ATF. Norris runs a website that raised some suspicions, and Ben wants to make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone. He swears that he’ll take him down, but he needs evidence that Norris has banned weapons or has been talking to dangerous people. He tells Veronica that he’s lost his chance and needs her to try to get close to Norris instead. He advises her to start by asking about Norris’ ancient weapon collection. After Ben leaves, Veronica and Logan share a couple of kisses.
Veronica heads to Norris’ house under the pretenses of wanting to identify stolen weapons for one of Keith’s cases. She tries to snoop around and lures him the garage with the idea of throwing stars with him. After he flirts with her a little, she sits outside in her car and hacks into his wi-fi. She calls Mac and asks for help, realizing that Norris probably wouldn’t have asked her on a date if he was planning on killing a bunch of people. Veronica spots Pete next door, then heads home and leaves a message for Norris to call her. The counter on KillemAll.net is down to 18 hours, 8 minutes, and 34 seconds. At school, Veronica warns Norris that Ben isn’t who he seems and Norris is about to get busted for calling in the bomb threats. Suddenly, ATF agents arrive and Ben arrests Norris. As Veronica tries to reason with the agents, they open Norris’ trunk and find Ben’s gun and fertilizer inside. In the journalism classroom, Veronica looks through her photos and then calls Pete to tell him that the paper will be publishing a story about how Pete framed Norris. He admits that Norris bullied him every day in junior high and his father never cared. Meg comes to get Veronica and tells her that Duncan has disappeared. Later, Veronica fills Ms. Stafford in on the whole bomb threat story and gets permission to publish a story about it. When it’s out, Wallace worries that everyone will figure out that he supplied Norris’ school records, but Veronica promises not to reveal her sources. In journalism class, Veronica and Logan don’t talk to each other. Ms. Stafford announces that Norris has been released from jail, thanks to Veronica’s article, but Ms. Stafford has been asked to leave Neptune. As she goes, Veronica takes over the class, saying, “Okay, buckaroos, we’re burning daylight in here.”
THE TITLE IS A PLAY ON... Weapons of mass destruction.
THE LILLY KANE CASE: After thinking that Veronica believes he killed Lilly, Duncan disappears.
MEMORABLE QUOTES: Veronica: “On the bright side, if our parents get hitched, we could have bunk beds and stay up all night talking.”
Veronica: “So how do I get into the garage without playing dungeon with this whack job?” (she holds up a throwing star)
Veronica: “I need you to walk me through something.”
Veronica: “Mac, if you were planning the Apocalypse on Friday, would you ask someone out on a date for that weekend?”
Written by Jed Seidel; directed by John T. Kretchmer
Wallace: “You’re truly sick.”
Veronica: “I’ve always wanted a little brother I could dress up like a little doll.”
Wallace: “Yeah? See how that works out for you.”
Norris: “Uh, you ever throw one?”
Veronica: “Can’t say that I have.”
Norris: “I got a target in the garage if you wanna try it.”
Veronica voiceover: “Huh. That was easy. I think it, it happens.”
Mac: “What did you ever do before you met me?”
Veronica: “Ever see the first ten minutes of 2001: A Space Odyssey? It was a lot like that.”
Mac: “Me? That’s the only way I’d ask someone out.”