"Here Comes the Son"
Written and directed by Amy Sherman-Palladino

Lorelai and Rory are at Weston’s Bakery, where Lorelai is going over Spanish phrases the girls might need on their trip to Europe. Lorelai thinks they will need to know how to say, “Does Antonio Banderas live near here?” as well as, “Does Johnny Depp live near here?” when they’re in France. Rory is trying to study for her upcoming finals and tells Lorelai to just bring the phrase books instead of trying to learn a bunch of phrases in a bunch of different languages. Lane arrives with brochures for Seventh Day Adventist colleges; she’s trying to find the good things in each school. This doesn’t work and she tells the girls that her life is over. At home, Lorelai sneaks around in the morning, trying not to wake Rory, who’s actually been awake for hours. She’s realized that at the rate she’s going, she won’t finish all of the work and obligations she has left before graduation. Lorelai thinks that Rory is pushing herself too hard, which she proves when she explains that she’s planned out every second until graduation. She adds that she needs to fit in a time to get together with Emily to pick out a dress to wear to graduation. Lorelai doesn’t want Rory to go but Rory has already promised.

As Rory worries about money for tuition, Luke arrives and tries to get Lorelai’s attention through the window in the back door. She goes outside (telling Rory she’s going to get the newspaper) and Luke tells her that Jess is gone, most likely for good. He tells her that he’s relieved, since Jess was driving him crazy, and points out that he’s 18, so he can do whatever he wants. Lorelai doesn’t think that Rory knows, since she hasn’t said anything, and she needs to figure out the best time to tell her. Luke laments that he failed Jess but Lorelai replies that he gave him a chance. If Jess chose not to take it, there’s nothing Luke could have done. Lorelai asks if Luke knows where Jess went; Luke has an idea. Jess arrives in California and, of course, hates it. Lorelai gets a letter from Yale stating that Rory doesn’t qualify for financial aid. She explains that she gave the $75,000 she recently received to her parents (see “Happy Birthday, Baby!”) to pay them back for paying her Chilton tuition. Yale still won’t give Rory the money, so Lorelai has to figure out another way to pay for school. Jess heads to a house, looking for Jimmy (see “Say Goodnight, Gracie”), and meets a woman named Sasha who has a bunch of dogs. He also meets a girl named Lily who reads in a cabinet.

At Chilton, Madeline and Louise discuss fashion and Rory thanks them for agreeing to pass out yearbooks for her. Emily calls Rory to discuss Emily’s outfit for graduation. Rory agrees to come over that afternoon with a color swatch from her cap and gown. She calls Lorelai to pass this along; Lorelai is in the Chilton cafeteria but Rory won’t go in because she doesn’t want to have to sign peoples’ yearbooks when she could be studying. Lorelai starts to tell Rory to stand up to Paris, who’s giving her more things to do, but she’s interrupted by Paris herself. Paris bugs her about tickets (which she’s selling for the grad night party) and then asks where Rory is. Lorelai says that she doesn’t know, and when Paris walks off, she immediately tells Rory to get out and save herself. In California, Sasha tells Jess that Lily is her daughter, not Jimmy’s. Jess is surprised to learn that they’re not married; Sasha notes that he and Jimmy must not have talked very much. Jimmy works at a hot dog stand, arguing with someone about pickles. Jess and Sasha arrive and father and son make small talk. Jess assures Jimmy that he didn’t come to California just to give him a hard time.

Rory heads to the elder Gilmores’ and meets Emily’s fashion consultant, Miss Celine. Back at Chilton, Louise and Madeline hand out yearbooks, ripping a page out of each because it contains an unflattering picture of them. Brad tells them that that page contained the only picture of him in the whole yearbook, so Madeline rips off his photo and gives it back to him. Paris worries that no one will buy a ticket to the grad night party; she tells Lorelai to unbutton her shirt to attract some guys. Lorelai tries to distract her with college talk and Paris says that her choices are Yale, Princeton, and Columbia. She doesn’t really like Columbia but going there would drive her mother crazy, so she wants to keep it on her list. She does like Princeton, but Jamie goes there and she doesn’t want it to look like she’s going there just to be with him. Lorelai gives her some advice, then tries to hug her. “Just give into it, baby,” she says. In California, Jimmy and Jess head back to Jimmy and Sasha’s house, but then Jess heads back out to check out a bookstore. Sasha confirms that Jimmy was in Connecticut the week before instead of in Sacramento. He tells her that he didn’t say anything because he wasn’t sure how the visit would go. Sasha is upset and doesn’t think their relationship means as much to Jimmy as it does to her. She also can’t believe that Jimmy didn’t ask Jess to spend the night or try to find out how long he’s in California. She thinks that he could be in trouble and, frustrated, tells Jimmy to do whatever he wants.

Lorelai heads over to her parents’ to get Rory; she’s surprised that Miss Celine is still alive. Lorelai tries to make nice with her mother but Emily says that she’s stressed about the busy night she has ahead of her. She and Lorelai argue about dinnertime; Lorelai accuses Emily of saying that dinner isn’t ready so that she doesn’t have to invite Lorelai to stay. Emily says that she actually can’t invite Lorelai to stay because she and Richard have to eat quickly and then leave. Lorelai doesn’t believe her and gets the truth out of Richard. She starts to leave so that Rory can have dinner with her grandparents, but Rory wants to go with her. She goes back inside to get her things and Emily says that she doesn’t know why Lorelai has to make everything so dramatic. “I think you’re being really stupid,” Rory tells her. Back in Stars Hollow, Lorelai and Rory get dinner and Rory tries to get her mother to hurry home so she can stay on schedule. They spot Luke, who rushes back inside instead of talking to them. Lorelai decides that this is the time to tell Rory that Jess has left town.

In California, Jimmy joins Jess at the bookstore and demands to know if he’s in town because he’s in some kind of trouble. Jess points out that Jimmy showed up in Stars Hollow without warning and for no reason as well. Jimmy admits that he went to see Jess but chickened out. Jess tells him that he came to see his father and also would like to stay for a while. Jimmy tells him that he can’t stay - he’s not a father and can’t take care of Jess. Jess points out that he’s already 18 and just needs a place to stay. He asks to just stay a month, telling Jimmy that he has nothing - Luke kicked him out, his mother’s crazy, and he’s not graduating. Jimmy agrees to try things out, as long as Sasha says it’s okay. At home, Rory and Lorelai look through Rory’s yearbook. Lorelai notices that a lot of people are referring to Rory as the valedictorian. Rory confirms that she’s earned the honor but complains that it means she has to write a speech. Lorelai tells her that she’s going to let her freak out and study and do everything she needs to do, but when finals are over, they’re going to celebrate.

MEMORABLE QUOTES: Rory: “I can’t finish all this and sleep at the same time.”
Lorelai: “You have to sleep; it’s what keeps you pretty.”
Rory: “Who cares if I’m pretty if I fail my finals?”
Lorelai: “Okay, you’ve got this so completely backwards.”

Luke: “Can she hear us?”
Lorelai: “Through the walls? No, I put some kryptonite in her waffles.”

Rory: “Louise, what’s your grandmother wearing to graduation?”
Louise: “Hopefully the pearls I get when she kicks.”

Paris: “Unbutton your top.”
Lorelai: “What?”
Paris: “Teenage boys are controlled by one thing. Unbutton your top.”
Lorelai: “No.”
Paris: “Well, me doing it isn’t going to help any.”
Lorelai: “Paris, you need to relax. You need to stop worrying. You need to stop obsessing. You need to stop looking at my boobs.”

Jimmy: “You know, when you left home, were the cops after you?”
Jess: “No.”
Jimmy: “‘No’ ‘cause they shouldn’t be or ‘no’ ‘cause they haven’t found the head yet?”


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