"M.A.D."
Veronica is stuck in the Neptune High parking lot, trying to fix her malfunctioning car as other students impatiently wait for her to move. Dick, Logan, and Dick’s brother Beaver (Kyle Gallner) approach and Beaver and Dick start mocking her. Logan tries to defend her and Veronica covers for his inability to be mean to her (see “Weapons of Class Destruction” and “Hot Dogs”). She borrows his knife to fix her car, then shares a secret look with her secret boyfriend before the guys leave. Nearby, a student named Carmen tries to break up with her boyfriend Tad, telling him that she doesn’t want a long distance relationship when he graduates from high school and goes to military school. He gives her a CD containing a song he wrote for her, but she tells him that it’s over. Before she can leave, he shows her a video on his cell phone of her doing something ostensibly naughty. Later, Carmen fills Veronica in on what happened (something dirty went on with a popsicle, though she doesn’t remember) and says that she’s worried Tad will use the video to get back at her. Veronica promises to get the phone for her. Later, Veronica and Logan make out in the bathroom and he apologizes for Dick and Beaver’s behavior. He notes that they have to “keep up appearances” in preparation for Duncan’s return (see “Weapons of Class Destruction”), since he wants to be the one who tells Duncan about him and Veronica. Veronica gives Logan a late slip before he heads to class, then embarks on her mission to help Carmen.
Veronica meets up with Wallace, who complains that their parents were together again the night before (see “Weapons of Class Destruction”). She wonders where they keep going from 6 to 10 on Mondays and Wednesdays. She then gives Wallace a phone number and asks him to call it during class. Veronica performs a “bump and bait,” running into Tad so that Wallace can put a cell phone into his backpack. She heads to class, pretending to talk on another cell phone, which her teacher takes away from her. In his class, Wallace calls the number Veronica gave him; the phone in Tad’s bag rings and the teacher takes it as well. Immediately after her last class, Veronica heads back to the teacher to get her phone, pretending that the one Wallace planted on Tad is actually hers. When Tad comes to get his, he’s surprised that it’s not there but quickly realizes that Veronica must have taken it. At home, Keith happily tells Veronica that with the money he could get from the Kanes for finding Duncan, he could afford to send Veronica to a really good college. He thinks that it’ll be easy to find Duncan, but Veronica admits that she accidentally gave him some pointers (again, see “Weapons of Class Destruction”). Alicia arrives and heads off with Keith, who leaves Veronica to start the search for Duncan. Carmen meets with Veronica, who gives her Tad’s phone and warns that the video could still be out there somewhere in another form. Carmen doesn’t think Tad would have made a copy and smashes the phone. Not long after, Veronica gets an e-mail from Tad with a file of the video attached.
At school, Veronica enlists Mac’s help to track down Duncan. She notes to herself that Carmen is back with Tad, which is the only way she can ensure that he doesn’t send the video to the whole school. Nearby, Weevil and Felix lament the fact that Carmen is dating a white guy. Tad and a friend get into a banter-fest with a gay guy named Seth; Seth thinks that the Navy is quite gay as well. Later, Veronica tells Carmen that she needs something that will ensure mutually assured destruction - something that will threaten to destroy him in order to get him to back off. She tells Carmen to get him to spend the afternoon with her on the boardwalk. Veronica heads to Weevil’s uncle’s yard to get her car fixed; Weevil tells her that he’s heard that the Kanes are offering a reward for Duncan’s return. She blasts him for using her to get into the Kanes’ house (see “Hot Dogs”), but he tells her that he could give her some information if she gave him 10 percent of the finder’s fee. He reveals that Duncan bought an old car from Weevil’s uncle before he left town. Veronica calls Keith to give him the information, then runs into Logan, who takes her to his place for a make-out session. They’re interrupted by Aaron, and after Veronica heads to the bathroom, Dick and Beaver arrive. Dick spots Veronica’s bag and thinks that Logan has a secret girlfriend, but Logan lies that it’s Trina’s and Aaron covers for him. He takes the bag to Veronica and gives her a ride home, telling her that he’ll keep their secret and that he hopes Logan is happy with her.
On the boardwalk, Carmen gets Tad tipsy, then gets him to take silly pictures and get a tattoo. She asks him to go talk to Seth and get some Ecstasy for prom night. As Tad and Seth chat, Veronica secretly takes pictures. Later, Veronica has Carmen call Tad for some sexy talk. Later, Keith tells Veronica that the car Duncan bought was spotted outside of Tijuana. He heads down to get him but learns that Duncan abandoned the car in Mexico. Veronica meets up with Mac and asks her to create “a highly incriminating, thoroughly libelous, sexually explicit website,” with some help from Seth. Veronica and Carmen meet with Tad, returning his smashed phone and telling him that he and Carmen are broken up. Veronica shows Tad the website Mac made, which includes real and Photoshopped pictures of Tad and Seth and Seth’s voice over Carmen’s in the taped phone conversation. Tad tries to pretend that he doesn’t care if the school finds out, but Veronica reveals that she has the e-mail addresses of his future classmates at the Naval Academy and will send them a link to the website. Carmen tells Tad off and leaves. After school, Logan brings Veronica her fixed car, which his father’s driver picked up, and tells her that he’s not going to Mexico to party with the other 09ers. He suggests that they skip school on Friday and hang out on Aaron’s boat. Logan starts to tell Veronica that Aaron felt badly for her when he first heard about her parents, but he’s interrupted by Dick and has to leave. At Mars Investigations, Veronica snoops around and finds a notice of service seeking Lianne, because legal proceedings in her name have been started.
At the sheriff’s department, Cliff chats with Loretta Cancun (see the pilot) and is interrupted by Veronica, who’s looking for information on the notice of service. He tells her that it could have to do with divorce, and that in California, you have to run a notice for seven days before filing for divorce on grounds of abandonment. Veronica learns that Keith has run the notice for six days, so she calls the newspaper to try to get the seventh day cancelled, but fails. Desperate, she tracks his cell phone (as he did to her in “Silence of the Lamb”) to a hotel, where she spots Keith and Alicia taking a ballroom dancing class. Realizing how happy is, Veronica gives up. Back at school, Carmen and Veronica learn that Tad has leaked the video anyway. Later, Carmen cries but tells Veronica that she’d rather have her reputation ruined than have to put up with Tad. Veronica gives her the chance to send the website link to the Naval Academy plebes, but Carmen chooses not to. Veronica catches a couple of kids watching Carmen’s video and realizes that it was taken at Shelly Pomeroy’s party - the party where she was drugged and raped.
At Mars Investigations, Keith notes that Veronica has learned about the notice and tells her that he should have said something. She replies that she wants him to be happy. Mac arrives and tells Veronica that a passport was purchased on the Internet and sent to an airport Marriott. Keith meets Mac and is glad to hear the possible new development in Duncan’s case. Veronica promises to give Mac a cut of the reward, then asks her to help her find out when Carmen’s video was recorded on Tad’s phone. Veronica learns that the video was, in fact, taken the night of the party at Shelly’s. At Kane Software, Wiedman summons Alicia and tells her that she should stop seeing Keith unless she wants to run into trouble at the office. She refuses, but he shows her the bug that Veronica planted in the plant Wallace delivered to his office (see “Betty and Veronica”). Veronica heads to school, planning to turn in a report and then skip to go hang out with Logan. She finds Tad duct-taped to the flagpole (like Wallace in the pilot), thanks to Weevil and the bikers. She offers to cut him down, but he spits out that Carmen is damaged goods and no guy will want to be with her. Veronica shoots back that if she’d been Carmen, she would have taken him down with her. She then asks who gave him the rohypnol he used to drug Carmen at Shelly’s party. He tells her that it was GHB, not roofies, and that it was supplied by Logan. Veronica pulls the bandage off of his new tattoo (revealing the name Seth) and leaves. On Aaron’s boat, Logan waits for Veronica, drinking champagne alone.
WELCOME TO NEPTUNE: Beaver
MEMORABLE QUOTES: Veronica: “Hey, do you think this thing…will ever get more normal?”
Logan: “Did I just get caught by my dad making out on the couch?”
“You just sign right here, dear…. ‘Screw you, pig.’ Nice. Okay, like a big girl now?” - Cliff to Loretta
Written by Phil Klemmer and John Enbom; directed by John T. Kretchmer
Logan: “What, like will we ever hang at the mall and hold hands and buy each other teddy bears with hearts that say ‘I wuv you bear-y much’?”
Veronica: “Yes, exactly that. Except I want my bear won through some sort of demonstration of ring tossing ability.”
Veronica: “Yeah, you got caught by your dad. I got caught by the star of Breaking Point and Beyond the Breaking Point.”