"Spit and Eggs"
Written and directed by Rob Thomas

The Pi Sigs are throwing a loud party at their frat house, and Piz and Mac are looking at the crowd, noting that they haven’t seen Veronica in a while. Veronica happens to be in Wallace and Piz’s dorm, bloody and seemingly running for her life. She comes to Piz and Wallace’s door and bangs on it, but no one opens it. As she sinks to the ground, someone approaches. Two days earlier, the Lilith House girls throw a mini parade to taunt the Greeks being kicked off campus (see “Lord of the Pi’s”). Logan and Dick approach and Veronica tries to carry on a conversation with Logan as if nothing as happened between them. Dick moons the Lilith girls, then heads off to give Logan and Veronica some time alone. After a few awkward moments, Logan tells Veronica that their relationship isn’t working because he’s not the person she seems to want him to be. He knows she doesn’t like to have to be helped, and he doesn’t like to have to wait around, not doing anything. “I think we can take a tough but survivable amount of pain now, or stay together and deal with unbearable pain later,” Logan says. He opts for the pain now. As he leaves, he tells Veronica that he’ll always be there if she needs him, but then again, she never needs anything.

Weevil fixes Dean O’Dell’s TV while they talk about boxing. As Weevil leaves, Mindy arrives to trade cars with him; she’s on her way to Sacramento on business. On Mindy’s way out, Dean O’Dell’s assistant tells him that there’s a man there to see him, but he wouldn’t offer his name (or put out his cigar). The man, Mel, reminds Dean O’Dell that he’s been very generous with his donations, and he seems to be unhappy about the loss of the frats. In the food court, Wallace and Mac notice Veronica’s sadness, but she tells them she doesn’t want to dwell on her breakup. The three join up with Piz, who tells them that that night’s radio show topic will be what to do with the now-empty frat houses. Dean O’Dell goes to Mars Investigations to share with Keith his suspicions that Mindy is having an affair (see “Hi, Infidelity”). Keith doesn’t think anything’s going on, but Dean O’Dell is pretty sure she’s cheating on him with a coworker. Later, at home, Keith tells Veronica that he’s going to Sacramento to check up on a possibly unfaithful wife. She tells him that she and Logan broke up but encourages him to go to Sacramento anyway. Later, she cries in the shower.

On Piz’s radio show, students discuss the frat houses while Piz wonders if Dean O’Dell will show up. He does arrive, but it’s only to announce that one of the people who voted against the Greeks owns property leased by the houses, so his vote doesn’t count. Dean O’Dell gets the deciding vote, and he’s bringing the Greeks back. The next day, the Pi Sigs celebrate in a makeshift float. They pass Dean O’Dell, whose car is surrounded, rocked, and pelted with eggs. He heads to his office, where Keith is waiting to tell him that Mindy’s coworker is actually gay, so there’s nothing going on between them. Dean O’Dell’s assistant shows him a classified ad warning students to stay away from the party the Pi Sigs are holding, as the rapist will be choosing his next victim there. Elsewhere on campus, Veronica finds Parker at a Take Back the Night table and they discuss the ad. Veronica suspects that Nish placed it so girls won’t go to the party. Parker says if that’s true, it’s not working, since a bunch of girls have dropped by to get special coasters that can be used to test drinks and determine if they contain date-rape drugs. She gives Veronica a bunch of coasters and a rape whistle, though Veronica doesn’t think the whistle would make any difference.

Veronica takes a coaster to Dean O’Dell and encourages him to require them at the Pi Sig party. He agrees. Veronica also tells him that no one knows how the ad got into the paper; it may have been added at the printer’s. Dean O’Dell mentions that Mindy is on her way back from Sacramento and Veronica puts things together. She then heads to Intro to Criminology, where the students get back their Plan a Perfect Murder papers. (Apparently Veronica chose Lamb as her victim.) Veronica receives an A and a note to see Tim after class. When she gets to his office, he’s not there, so she looks at the board where he’s keeping track of the rape case (see “Hi, Infidelity”). Tim seems to have Chip and Dick on his list of suspects. Tim arrives and tells Veronica that when he solves the case, he wants Landry to know that he’s the only one who should get the credit, so he won’t share any theories with Veronica. Veronica declines to share, too. The two are interrupted by Tim’s girlfriend - Bonnie, who has been friendly with some of the Pi Sigs (see “Lord of the Pi’s”). Instead of spilling the beans, Veronica heads home and tells Keith that Mindy is having an affair with Landry. Keith tells her that he’s going to have to tell Dean O’Dell.

Moe pays a visit to Wallace and Piz, who are then joined by Veronica, who invites them to the Pi Sigs’ party. They tell her they were already planning to go, as are most of the students at Hearst. Moe tells Veronica that he’s helping out with the Safe Ride Home cart, so she gives him her phone number and tells him to call if he picks up a girl who might have been drugged. Veronica then goes to Mac’s room to enlist her, who is less than enthusiastic but agrees to go to the party. Keith heads to Dean O’Dell’s office and shares the Mindy/Landry news with him. He’s not pleased. Veronica and friends arrive at the party, where she’s quickly recognized by Drew, the guy she threw a drink at in “The Rapes of Graff.” She hands out coasters and fake IDs to Mac, Wallace, and Piz. Drew tells the group that everyone has to buy a cup - $5 for soda, $10 for beer - and write his or her name on it. (Mac goes for the soda cup; she’s too smart to drink at the party.) Veronica isn’t satisfied by the available coasters and asks to speak to Chip. He doesn’t care that the coasters don’t test drinks, or that Veronica has now tested his date’s drink. Later, Piz dances (badly) to distract a guy so Wallace can test his date’s drink.

Veronica spots Dick with Bonnie and the three trade some barbs. Some guy hits on Mac, admiring her “ask me about my STD” shirt, and she lets him pour some booze into her cup. She tests it, but even after it comes up negative for drugs, she pours it out. Dean O’Dell drinks in his office, complaining to Keith and promising that he won’t be driving anywhere. Piz and Wallace find a girl who’s passed out just as Moe and Fern arrive to take her home. After Keith leaves Dean O’Dell in his office for the night, Dean O’Dell pulls a gun out of his desk. Tim arrives at the Pi Sig party and confronts Bonnie for cheating on him. He tells her that he knew about every guy she was with, and every time she slept with someone new, he did, too. Tim storms off after the one-sided argument, but Bonnie doesn’t seem to care. Veronica runs into Logan and Mercer talking to some girls; Mercer leaves, claiming it’s not to give them time alone but because his radio show is on soon. Before Veronica and Logan can start a conversation, Piz and Wallace arrive with the news that they’ve found a drugged drink. No one has seen Kim, the girl the cup belongs to, but they know where she lives. Logan and Wallace head to her apartment while Veronica announces to the rest of the party that they’re looking for Kim.

Landry and Mindy get friendly at the Neptune Grand but are quickly interrupted by Dean O’Dell. A friend of Kim’s tells Veronica that Kim didn’t come to the party - she loaned her ID to her younger sister Carrie, who went home because she wasn’t feeling well. As Veronica heads off to Carrie’s dorm (which is also Wallace and Piz’s dorm), Mercer’s show begins to air. It’s supposed to be a live call-in show, but Veronica immediately realizes that it’s been taped - Mercer has no alibi for the nights of the rapes, he’s not at the party, and he must be the rapist. The sheriff’s department receives a call about a bomb threat at Hearst, but Sacks thinks the campus police should handle the situation. Mercer heads to Carrie’s dorm room, which contains a unicorn theme, and spots a girl under the bed covers. He turns on some music, sits down on the bed, and starts talking about how raping girls means he doesn’t have to wait to have sex. Just as Mercer is about to start shaving the girl, he hears a noise from the closet - it’s Carrie. Veronica jumps up from the bed and tries to taser him, but he’s too quick and knocks it away. They fight and Veronica manages to hide under the bed, where she’s able to grab a unicorn and stab Mercer in the leg with its horn. This allows her to escape the room, where she runs to Wallace and Piz’s locked room and is met by Moe.

Moe gives Veronica tea while he calls the police. Veronica wants to go back to Carrie’s room, since she’s still there, but Moe tells her to stay while he takes care of things. As Veronica waits, she looks around the room and spots a photo of Moe and Mercer participating in Dr. Kinny’s prison experiment (see “My Big Fat Greek Rush Week”). Too late, she realizes that she’s been given a drug. She’s also locked in the room and can’t go out the window, since the room is too high up. Veronica grabs Moe’s cell phone and calls Keith, but his voice mail picks up. She spots a hammer in the closet, but grabbing it pulls down a few locks of girls’ hair. Mercer and Moe arrive and, unable to find Veronica, think that she got away. Moe apologizes, calling Mercer “sir,” and Mercer hits him. In the closet, the phone rings, and when Moe goes in to get it, Veronica slams the hammer down on his foot. Mercer pulls her out of the closet while trying to come up with a plan. He tells Moe to give him the rest of his GHB so they can drug Veronica beyond remembering anything that’s happened. Moe is out, though, so Mercer tells him to stay with Veronica while he goes to his room to get more.

Veronica blows her rape whistle, which Parker hears just as Mercer is returning. She senses that something’s wrong and screams, alerting a crowd. Mercer convinces them that nothing’s going on, then runs off with Moe. Parker is still suspicious and goes into Mercer’s room, where she finds Veronica. Later that night, Dean O’Dell sleeps back in his office but is awakened when eggs are thrown at his windows. Someone opens the door and Dean O’Dell asks, “What are you doing here?” At the sheriff’s department, Keith blasts Sacks for not evacuating Hearst after the bomb threat. Veronica tells him that she called him from Moe’s phone, so Moe’s number is now saved in Keith’s phone. Keith is able to use this to find Mercer and Moe in a hotel room. At home, Veronica tells her friends that Moe would drug the girls, then call Mercer to come rape them. She also thinks Moe was the one who shaved her in the parking lot (see “Of Vice and Men”) in an attempt to clear Mercer’s name. The two planned their attacks for the same nights as the Pi Sigs’ parties so there would be plenty of other people to blame. Veronica notes that she hasn’t seen Logan recently; this is because he’s busy beating up a police car to get himself thrown in jail so he can confront Mercer. Weevil arrives at Dean O’Dell’s office to find the dean dead from a gunshot wound to the head.

THE RAPE CASE: Mercer taped his call-in show to give himself an alibi while he raped the victims. Moe was Mercer’s lackey, drugging the girls and then calling Mercer to come rape them

THE DEAN O’DELL CASE: Dean O’Dell reinstated the Greeks on campus after possibly being blackmailed by Mel.

Dean O’Dell confronted Mindy and Landry with a gun after learning about their affair.

Eggs were thrown at Dean O’Dell’s window just before someone entered his office and he asked, “What are you doing here?”

Weevil found Dean O’Dell dead of a gunshot wound to the head the morning after he was shot.

MEMORABLE QUOTES: Veronica: “I’m not looking for a pity party.”
Wallace: “That’s good. I always get stuck blowing up the pity balloons.”

“Will they let me in? I think all the glitter has come off my Porn Star tube top.” - Mac

Wallace: “If you see a really cute girl and you want to dance with her?”
Veronica: “Dance. Just know that your libido caused some girl to get raped.”
Wallace: “That kinda takes the fun out of it.”
Veronica: “Hey, it’s your life.”
Wallace: “Since when?”

“Man, when I look at the two of you, all I see are a couple of Petri dishes.” - Veronica to Dick and Bonnie


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