"The Third Lorelai"
Written by Amy Sherman-Palladino; directed by Michael Katleman

Lorelai, Rory, and Emily spend a quiet Friday night dinner together, since Rory and Lorelai are tired. Emily says that the Kennedys used to spend their meals debating everything in the world and quizzing each other on different subjects. Lorelai decides that the best topic to discuss is butt models. “Camelot is truly dead,” Emily replies. Richard arrives and announces that he has received good news from a long distance phone call. Lorelai wonders if he was talking to God, but Richard was speaking to someone in London. After some discussion of whether or not Richard’s mother is God, he announces that she’s coming to visit. Lorelai tells Rory that she was named after her, which Rory thinks makes sense, since Richard’s mother’s name is also Lorelai. Emily keeps asking when the original Lorelai (aka Trix) is coming as Richard talks about how great she is. Upon learning that Trix is coming in one week, Emily leaves the room. Later, Lorelai finds Emily in the basement, unpacking everything Trix has given her and Richard over the past 35 years that she’s hidden away. Lorelai doesn’t think that Trix will remember everything she’s given them, but Emily says that she will because she controls everything about presents she gives.

In the car on the way home, Rory asks for more information on her great-grandmother. Lorelai tells her that she moved to London after her husband died, and her parents would go visit her every year but always leave Lorelai at home. Rory says that Richard told her she reminds him of Trix; Lorelai says that’s the best compliment he could give her. She assures Rory that Trix will love her. Rory hopes that Trix gets along with Emily and Lorelai repeats that Trix will love Rory. At Chilton, Rory, Paris, Madeline, Louise, Tristan, and two other students work on a project together, creating a fake government. Paris, of course, takes control and attempts to appoint Tristan and Rory the king and queen. Rory tries to pass the crown to Paris, but she says that she’s already the head of Parliament. Madeline offers to be the queen and everyone agrees. Louise wants to be the lady-in-waiting, but Paris argues that that’s not a political office. “No, but they get all the sex,” Louise replies. Paris wants the group to work on the project all weekend and has already come up with an outline for their political system. After class, Paris asks Rory what’s up with her and Tristan, since they’re acting weird around each other. Rory tells her that nothing is going on, declining to tell her about their brief kiss in “The Breakup, Part 2.” Paris encourages her to read her manifesto (which Rory thinks makes her sound like the Unabomber); she renames it her doctrine.

Rory heads back to the classroom to get something and runs into Tristan. She says that she thinks they need to talk about the awkwardness between them, since they’re going to be going to school together for another two years. At the inn, Lorelai and Michel bicker over her troubles with the computer. Emily calls, asking Lorelai for a hat rack she gave her for Christmas, which she was actually originally given by Trix. Lorelai is shocked that the hat rack was regifted but agrees to bring the hat rack to her parents’ house that night. Tristan and Rory have their talk, agreeing that they were both upset about their respective breakups and that their kiss didn’t mean anything. She promises that her crying had nothing to do with his kiss. Tristan vows to swear off girls for a while, but Rory doubts that he can accomplish that goal. She suggests that he swear of the kind of girls he’s been with and go for someone like Paris. He agrees to at least consider the possibility. At home, Lorelai tries to rush Rory out the door for Friday night dinner; Rory accuses her of wanting to get there so she can see Emily uncomfortable around Trix. Lorelai denies this and promises to be nice. However, she wants to bring a camera to capture how miserable Emily is. In the car, Lorelai laughs to herself and Rory calls her mean.

At the Gilmores’, Lorelai and Rory drag in the heavy coat rack up to the house and Lorelai suggests just leaving it outside. Emily makes them bring it in, trying to remember exactly where it used to be. Rory and Lorelai head in to meet Trix (Marion Ross), who obviously doesn’t like Emily but seems to like her granddaughter and great-granddaughter. Trix asks about Lorelai’s job and admires the fact that she works hard at the inn. She announces that she wants dinner, but Emily has to admit that it’s not ready yet. Later that evening, Trix gets upset upon learning that Rory wants to go to Harvard. She Richard that he went to Yale, where his father also went, and therefore Rory has to go there, too. She also wonders how Lorelai can afford to send Rory to Chilton. Everyone explains Lorelai’s arrangement with her parents. Trix then criticizes the evening’s menu. At 9 on Saturday morning, Louise and Madeline wait for their classmates at Chilton so they can work on their project. Paris and Rory arrive and the girls are happy to see that Rory has brought donuts and coffee. Tristan shows up and pulls Paris aside, making Madeline and Louise wonder what he wants. When Paris returns, she tells the girls that Tristan asked her out. However, when Louise learns that he wants to go out that night, she thinks that means that he already had plans that wound up being cancelled. Louise adds that Paris isn’t really Tristan’s type, but she and Madeline offer to perform a makeover on Paris.

Back at home, Lorelai shares her day with Rory while she rushes to get ready for dinner. Rory tells her that she needs to stay home to work on her project, then tells her that Tristan asked Paris out, thanks to Rory’s matchmaking. As Lorelai leaves, Rory tells her again to be nice to Emily. Later, Paris shows up at Rory’s, panicking over what to wear on her date. Rory wonders why she didn’t go to Louise or Madeline for advice, but Paris doesn’t think they’d understand how she’s feeling. She’s brought over almost her entire wardrobe, but Rory decides that it would be better to raid her mother’s closet. As they look for clothes, Paris wonders why Tristan asked her out, since she doesn’t think they’re in the same league. Rory encourages her and tells her that she knows how she feels, since she’d never dated anyone before Dean. As Paris goes to change, Rory spots note cards that she’s brought for the evening, in case she needs an interesting subject. Rory thinks that Paris winds up looking great. At dinner, Trix tells Lorelai that she brought their dinner, a rabbit, with her from London - she transported it on the plane in dry ice. After dinner, she tells Lorelai that she doesn’t think she should have to borrow Rory’s tuition money from Richard and Emily. She wants to set up a trust fund for Rory that she can access right now. Richard and Lorelai are appreciative, and Trix says that Lorelai can thank her the next day, when she comes to tea with her and Emily.

Trix heads to bed and Emily asks Lorelai if she’s seriously considering accepting the money. She doesn’t think it’s smart since Rory probably wouldn’t know how to manage the funds. Emily think that once Rory has the money, she won’t think she needs Lorelai anymore, and Lorelai will lose her daughter the way Emily lost her. She says that Rory will have many options and will not have the same relationship with Lorelai that she has now. Lorelai doesn’t believe her and heads home, where she finds that Rory has fallen asleep studying. The next morning, Lorelai tells Sookie what Trix has offered. She admits that she hasn’t told Rory yet and Sookie suggests she send her a singing telegram, or that they call Rory and sing “the money song from Cabaret” (Lorelai will be Liza Minelli and Sookie will be Joel Grey). Sookie doesn’t think that Lorelai wants to tell Rory; Lorelai admits that she’s still worrying about the things that Emily said to her. Sookie says that Emily just wants to stay in control and mess with Lorelai’s mind. She doesn’t think it’s possible that money would change Lorelai and Rory’s relationship. Lorelai heads off for tea, still unsure of what she wants to do. At the Gilmores’, Emily and Richard fight over Trix’s trust fund offer. Emily thinks that once Lorelai has the money for Rory’s tuition, she’ll never come back to their house. Trix and Emily head to tea before Richard and Emily can finish their discussion. Rory and Paris meet up at Chilton and Paris tells Rory that the date went well; there was even a good night kiss.

When Tristan arrives, Paris realizes that leaving five messages on his answering machine was a little too much. He tells her that he thinks they would be better off as friends and admits that Rory was the person who encouraged him to ask her out. Paris confronts Rory, accusing her of pushing her castoff on her. After Paris storms out, Rory blasts Tristan for telling Paris. He tells her that he thought it was better to break things off than to keep dating someone when he likes someone else. Rory thinks that he’s not over Summer yet; it takes her a moment to realize that he was actually talking about her. At tea, Lorelai tells Emily that she hasn’t told Rory about the money yet. Emily realizes that what she said struck a nerve with Lorelai and she’s reconsidered Trix’s offer. Catching on to Emily’s games, Lorelai decides to call Rory and tell her about the money. Emily tries to stop her and Lorelai tells her to stop being controlling and realize that nothing could change her relationship with Rory. Trix returns from the restroom and announces that she has to go back home so that she can pack. She also doesn’t want to sit there and have to listen to Lorelai and Emily fight. She decides that the trust fund is a bad idea after all, since the adults are acting more immature about it than Rory probably would. Trix leaves and Lorelai tells Emily that she’s won, since Lorelai isn’t taking the money now. Emily offers to get Richard to fix thing, but Lorelai decides to stick with the original deal. She also doesn’t want to have to take the hat rack back. Lorelai meets Rory’s bus and Rory admits that she loaned Paris one of Lorelai’s skirts, which she may never see again. Lorelai replies, “You lost out on a quarter of a million dollars today.”


MEMORABLE QUOTES: Emily: “You were on the phone.”
Richard: “Long distance.”
Lorelai: “God?”
Richard: “London.”
Lorelai: “God lives in London?”
Richard: “My mother lives in London.”
Lorelai: “Your mother is God?”
Richard: “Lorelai.”
Lorelai: “So, God is a woman.”
Richard: “Lorelai.”
Lorelai: “And a relative, that’s so cool. I’m gonna totally ask for favors.”
Richard: “Make her stop.”
Rory: “Oh, that I could.”

Emily: “I need the hat rack.”
Lorelai: “The fish flies at night.”

Trix: “You were still in your teens, wild hair flying everywhere. I see you’ve taken care of that.”
Lorelai: “Yes, I joined a support group, bought a hair brush, and just taking it one day at a time.”
Trix: “That was a joke?”
Lorelai: “Yes, it is.”
Trix: “Very good.”

Louise: “Those who simply wait for information to find them spend a lot of time sitting by the phone. Those who go out and find it themselves have something to say when it rings.”
Rory: “Nietzsche?”
Louise: “Dawson.”
Rory: “My next guess.”

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