"I Am God"
On a bus, Veronica draws a picture of a figure holding a scythe and standing over nine tombstones. Behind her are a soaking-wet Meg and two other bus crash victims, Peter and Betina. Veronica wakes up in class and is summoned to see Ms. James (last seen in “Clash of the Tritons”), who says that her teacher mentioned she’s been caught wearing headphones in class three times. She also ripped down a poster with photos on it. Veronica admits that she’s being haunted by the kids who died in the bus crash. She then tells Ms. James about each of the kids. Cervando was a smart biker. Betina was Dick’s friend with benefits. Rhonda (see “Blast from the Past”) called her friend Michele just before the crash. Marcos was one of the stars of Neptune’s pirate radio station (see “Ahoy Mateys”); that’s what Veronica has been listening to on her headphones. Peter posted about his love life on the Pirate Ship website (see “Versatile Toppings”). And then there’s Meg, who has told Veronica a lot about a janitor named Lucky. Veronica flashes back to a dream in which she’s on the underwater bus with Meg, who’s wearing a “Baby on Board” T-shirt. Veronica asks her about Lucky, whom Meg explains is a guy from church who her parents invited over for dinner. He would tell them about the four months he served in Iraq before being shot in the rear end. Meg grows upset when she realizes that Veronica has been reading her e-mails (see “Green-Eyed Monster”). She says that Lucky is just a guy who hangs out with high school students like Logan to try to “hang on to his glory days.”
Back in the present, Veronica tells Ms. James that the dreams started after Michele set up a booth to raise money to buy a page in the yearbook for each of the crash students. She thinks Michele is starting to go crazy. In a flashback, Michele tells Veronica that she could even buy audio chips that play the students laughing when the yearbook is opened. In the present, Veronica explains that Rhonda not only left a message for Michele as the bus was crashing, but she left another on Michele’s home answering machine in which Michele could hear all of the kids laughing. In a flashback, Veronica listens to the message, in which Dick can be heard talking to Betina. In the present, Ms. James notes that Dick wasn’t on the bus and asks if Veronica has told Keith about the message. In a flashback, Veronica dreams of being on the bus with Rhonda as it crashes, then wakes up shouting. Keith notices her file on the students and she tells him about Rhonda’s message. She asks him about the drawing on the bus but Keith claims he didn’t see it (see “Rat Saw God”). She shows it to him and they wonder if the person who drew the sketch and wrote “I am God” crashed the bus. Keith wonders why there are nine tombstones, since only eight people dies. Veronica thinks the ninth was supposed to be hers. In the present, Veronica shows Ms. James the drawing and tells her that she needs to find out who drew it.
Veronica goofs off a little with Logan in the hallway, admitting that she hasn’t been sleeping well lately. She asks him about Lucky (whose real name is Tommy Dohanic) and he reminds her that she met him. He flashes back to making out with her in his car, taking a moment before getting to the important part of the story. Lucky (James Jordan) and Dick interrupt the make-out session to take Logan somewhere (possibly to burn down the pool - see “Normal is the Watchword”). In physics, the teacher, Mr. Wu, announces his annual egg drop contest, in which teams of students design a device to protect an egg dropped from increasing heights. The winning team gets to skip the final. After some racist comments, Dick wonders if Mr. Wu is hitting on him and makes a Brokeback Mountain joke. Mr. Wu pairs him up with a girl named Angie, then puts Logan with Wallace. At lunch, Veronica beckons Dick to her by writing, “I know what you did last summer” on her computer. She plays Rhonda’s message for him and then asks him about Betina; he makes it clear that he just needed someone to have sex with. Veronica thinks that she was scorned because of the way she played recordings of him on the bus. Dick says that she shouldn’t have been upset because he gave her his gift bag from the trip to Shark Field. Later, Veronica thinks she spots Keith in the hallway but he doesn’t acknowledge her. She then approaches Maureen, a friend of Betina’s, pretending to help Michele with her yearbook tribute. Maureen tells her that Dick treated Betina “like a free hooker,” and though he just wanted to fool around, Betina wanted to get pregnant so she could tell everyone the baby was his.
In another bus dream, Betina wears a shirt that says “I [heart] Dick Casablancas” while Peter wears a rainbow. Meg announces that she has important information and Peter adds, “Don’t we all?” Before they can share, the bus crashes. Veronica wakes up in class, listening to the end of an “Ahoy Mateys” broadcast. At the Neptune Grand, Wallace and Logan work on their egg contraption, which works. Logan notes that Wallace doesn’t seem to like him much, but Wallace replies that the last time they spent any time together, Logan was taking out Veronica’s headlights (see the pilot). Logan calls that “foreplay.” At the Mars’ apartment, Veronica asks Keith if he was at school; he was wearing the same clothes he has on now, his “dating uniform.” She wonders if he and Ms. James are seeing each other again. Instead of responding, Keith gives her a letter from Stanford University. She thinks it’s “a little anorexic for an acceptance letter,” but she’s wrong, which makes them both happy. At school the next day, Clemmons tells Veronica and Angie that there’s been an error in their class rank calculations - since Angie took a college course, the A she got should be worth five points, not four. Therefore, she’s now ahead of Veronica in the race for the Kane Scholarship. Upset, Veronica goes to see Ms. James again and complains about Angie. She mentions that she’s still having nightmares, but her father is happy. Ms. James is glad to hear this but tells her that they’re not in touch. Later, Veronica and Wallace look at the photos for the yearbook spreads and Wallace notes that Rhonda wasn’t as innocent as she’s being portrayed. She and her sister Natalie were troublemakers, as well as poor white trash.
At the Hut, Keith meets with a woman and they discuss dating services. Angie receives a gift in Mr. Wu’s class as Logan and Wallace prepare to present their egg contraption. Just as Wallace drops it, Angie returns and announces that she got into Stanford. Dick jokes that she can room with Veronica. Angie announces that she’s offended by his comments and tells Mr. Wu she wants a new partner, since Dick didn’t even help with the project. Mr. Wu proves this by asking Dick to pick out his and Angie’s project; of course he can’t. As a result, Dick gets sentenced to summer school. Wallace and Logan decide to keep working on their contraption to see how well they can do. In the parking lot, Wallace and Veronica spot Natalie, who doesn’t look like their idea of poor white trash - especially because she drives a Corvette. Natalie isn’t forthcoming with information about the car, so Veronica calls Keith (who’s on another date at the Hut) and asks him to run the financial records of the families who lost kids in the crash. Logan and Wallace work on the contraption more at the Neptune Grand; Wallace wants to do well so that Angie can’t take a pass on the exam and Veronica will be able to get ahead of her for the scholarship. Logan claims not to be continuing for the same reason, but Wallace doesn’t believe him. After Logan leaves the room, Wallace turns on the TV and comes across the episode of Tinseltown Diaries from “The Quick and the Wed.” Logan catches him, telling him that they run it twice a day, and Wallace seems to sympathize with him a little more.
At the Mars’ residence, Keith cooks chili and tells Veronica that according to the financial records he checked, none of the families of the crash victims got payouts from insurance. However, Rhonda’s family won a lawsuit against Woody’s restaurant after her mother found a finger in a ribwich. At Neptune High, Veronica breaks into Clemmons’ office again to look in the crash students’ personal files in case they hold any interesting information. Hearing people coming, she hides in the closet and overhears Clemmons and Keith talking about a recent rash of generalized anxiety disorder diagnoses. The students with this diagnosis have been labeled section 1123 and all have the same doctor. Clemmons is upset because now they all get extensions on deadlines and unlimited time when they take tests. Keith goes to the closet to get his coat and sees Veronica but doesn’t say anything to Clemmons about her presence. Keith goes on another date at the Hut, but now it’s clear that he’s only with the woman because she’s the office manager for a doctor. At Neptune High, Veronica goes to see Mr. Wu, whom she has learned Peter had a crush on; there was an incident involving him that is mentioned in Peter’s permanent record. Veronica wonders if Peter was planning to out Mr. Wu, since he wanted to out someone, but Mr. Wu denies that he’s gay. Apparently he and Peter ran into each other at a gay bar, but Mr. Wu was only there for his cousin’s birthday party. Veronica also makes no headway in finding out if Peter was an artist.
Veronica dreams of Peter playing with an egg and a baseball mitt, asking if Veronica thinks she knows him just because she read his postings. She looks at her hand and sees her name written on it, like it was on Moran’s hand. He suggests that she ask herself why he was at a baseball stadium. At lunch, Veronica approaches Cassidy, who had a run-in with Cervando during summer school. Cassidy flashes back to Cervando, who just got expensive jeans with money he hustled from Liam Fitzpatrick. Dick sprays the jeans with a water gun, and the next day, Cervando comes back upset because the gun was filled with bleach. He threatens Cassidy instead of Dick because, as Cassidy believes, Dick was too big for Cervando to deal with. “Story of my life,” Cassidy remarks. Keith brings Clemmons a tape of a doctor’s office manager offering to get Veronica a generalized anxiety disorder diagnosis for $1,000. In Mr. Wu’s class, Angie successfully completes the egg drop, but Wallace and Logan don’t have as much luck. After class, Angie tells a friend that she couldn’t study for an English test because of the egg project, but since she’s a section 1123 student, she’ll get an extension. Veronica runs into Logan, who tells her she doesn’t look well after all her sleepless nights. She shoots back sarcastically that he’s a catch and she doesn’t know how Hannah has been able to stay away. Wallace walks up as Logan is leaving, hurt, and suggests that Veronica cut him a break. She’s confused. Just as Angie is preparing to ask for an extension on her test, Clemmons announces that 1123 students will no longer get extensions or exemptions.
Veronica nods off in Mr. Wu’s class and is woken up to work out a problem on the board. As she does so, she’s back on the bus, working out a problem as Cervando watches. He asks her how she got home the day of the crash and she tells him Weevil gave her a ride. He tells her that the bomb didn’t kill the students, just Ed the driver; everyone else except Meg drowned. He draws a diagram, explaining that whoever wanted to take out the whole bus had to have set off the bomb at a certain point, which means he or she had to have been nearby. She realizes that he’s accusing Weevil. “I am God,” Cervando replies. Veronica finds herself back in class, writing, “I am God” on the board as a song with the same lyrics plays. Fortunately, she’s dreaming, and the song is from an “Ahoy Mateys” broadcast. She does an Internet search for the song and discovers that it’s by a group called the Wannabes - and their album cover is the picture from the bus seat. Veronica returns to Ms. James’ office to tell her what she’s figured out and Ms. James asks if she’s done being haunted. Veronica hopes she is. Back at home, Keith tells Veronica that Dick Sr. took out a life insurance policy on Dick and Cassidy three days after he married Kendall. Cassidy and Dick are worth more dead than alive. Veronica dreams again, this time talking to Marcos, who tells her that everyone on the bus died because of her. He holds up a drawing, implying that he was the one who drew the album cover on the bus seat. A cell phone rings and Marcos looks at the caller ID, then tells Veronica it’s for her. It stops ringing as Rhonda leaves Michele a message from the back of the bus. Veronica looks down to see a bag containing C4 attached to two baseballs. The phone starts ringing again.
WELCOME TO NEPTUNE: Lucky
THE SCHOOL BUS CASE: Dick gave Betina his gift bag from Shark Field.
Thanks to a life insurance policy, Dick and Cassidy were worth more dead than alive.
MEMORABLE QUOTES: Veronica: “It was just a bad dream.”
Veronica: “I haven’t been sleeping.”
Wallace: “I’m just trying to avoid flunking. Hearst would yank my scholarship.”
Maureen: “Dick Casablancas is the bastard child of Satan.”
Wallace: “When I die, I want you to raise money for my spread in Vibe.”
“Congratulations. You’ve single-handedly fulfilled the Stanford b%$@# quota.” - Logan to Angie
“Veronica, I think that when you get out in the world a little more, you’ll - you’ll discover that not all well-dressed, articulate, detail-oriented men are gay. Many of them are just Asian.” - Mr. Wu
Ms. James: “The tombstone art work was just an album cover?”
Written by Diane Ruggiero and Cathy Belben; directed by Martha Mitchell
Keith: “Did you watch House of Wax again? You know that Hilton girl gives you nightmares.”
Logan: “Thoughts of me? Hey, I get it. Um, sometimes I’m up all night just thinking about myself.”
Logan: “Excellent. The bar is so low, we can step over it.”
Veronica: “Well, that would explain a lot.”
Veronica: “Oh, didn’t I e-mail you? You’re never allowed to die.”
Veronica: “And Rosebud was just a sled. I didn’t just ruin Citizen Kane for you, did I?”